Warrior General Games

because jtrav understandably lives for it

Consolidated list of fail
Week 1 - Drunk Masterminds
Week 2 - Vicious Circle (ADD) Passing
Week 3 - Sunday Funday Offense
Week 4 - Cobden Muskrats Fumble Recovery Fails
Week 5 - BC Lions Red Zone Offense
Week 6 - Dot Bilderberg Agency Final Four Minutes
Week 7 - Victoria Teabaggers Clock Management
Week 8 - Legacy's Runnin with the Real McCoys late-game defense
Week 9 - Dallas Paladins' rush QB defense
Week 10 - Victoria Teabaggers game-losing overtime punt return fumble
Week 11 - Puffington Magic Dragons special teams
Week 12 - Legacy's Runnin with the Real McCoys Time of Possession
Week 13 - Fire Breathing Rubber Duckies Run Defense and Pass Offense
Week 14 - CPL lack of variety
Week 15 - Dot Bilderberg Agency field position
Week 16 - Puffington Magic Dragons offense
Playoffs Round 1 - Vicious Circle turnovers
Playoffs Round 2 - Puffington Magic Dragons
Playoffs Round 3 - Oseberg Vikings
Playoffs Round 4 - none

Who could get plastered by a bunch of incoherent Wineswilling Fancy Boys? Well, the Drunk Masterminds, that's who. In a week of general triumph for the conference we know and love, the Drunk hit the Molson XXX a bit too hard and I'm actually not sure they even showed up to the right field. Austin hammered them on the scoreboard, leaving fans in a stunned stupor. Congrats, Masterminds!

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WEEK 1 FAIL
Drunk Masterminds

one does not go into austin and expect a win
btw...why are declining dots taking up space in pro league?

Originally posted by TrevJo
because jtrav understandably lives for it

Consolidated list of fail
Week 1 - Drunk Masterminds

Few things I get more excited about than the failwhale

Vicious and Brutal are words that go together easily, but in week 2 the story was brutal passing by Vicious. Trailing in a close game throughout the second half, they mustered just 93.5 yards passing on 34 attempts and watched Legacy's Runnin with the Real McCoys put the game away despite less than 23 minutes time of possession for the winning team. 10 hurries and 5 bad throws highlighted the performance. The longest pass of the day was a 17 yard must-have completion on 3rd & 10.5 under two minutes. But shortly thereafter 3 straight incompletions inspired the ADD coaches to just punt and hope for a fumble I guess, with 29 seconds left and no timeouts. Final: Legacy 20, Vicious 13, the second-fewest points needed by a winning team thus far for a CPL team. Congrats, Circle!

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WEEK 2 FAIL
Vicious Circle (ADD) Passing

Belated week 3 fail goes to Sunday's offense. I know they're young, but damn, shut out in consecutive weeks? They didn't even challenge Cobden, falling below the Mendoza line for completion percentage, and rushing for just 23 yards on 13 carries by the backs. Even a second-quarter interception at the Muskrat's 46 couldn't get them on the scoreboard. They lost 2.5 yards and went three and out instead. Well below the standards of the team that was a solid playoff seed in their second season of decline not long ago. Congrats, Funday!

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WEEK 3 FAIL
Sunday Funday Offense

Week 4 fail goes to Cobden's fumble recoveries, or lack thereof. No shame in losing to the Rubber Duckies, but 2 fumbles by each team and all 4 of them recovered by the Fire Breathers? pringles might want to employ some XFL kickoff drills to inspire some hustle on loose balls. Rubber capitalized with 10 points off Cobden cough-ups in the 45-35 win, and pounced on their own whoopses to salvage punts in the first and third quarters. Congrats Muskrats!

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WEEK 4 FAIL
Cobden Muskrats Fumble Recovery Fails

Originally posted by TrevJo
Belated week 3 fail goes to Sunday's offense. I know they're young, but damn, shut out in consecutive weeks? They didn't even challenge Cobden, falling below the Mendoza line for completion percentage, and rushing for just 23 yards on 13 carries by the backs. Even a second-quarter interception at the Muskrat's 46 couldn't get them on the scoreboard. They lost 2.5 yards and went three and out instead. Well below the standards of the team that was a solid playoff seed in their second season of decline not long ago. Congrats, Funday!

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WEEK 3 FAIL
Sunday Funday Offense

wat

Week 5 fail goes to BC's red zone offense. At 2-2 and facing a 1-3 team, they had a chance to get well this week. But in the first half, trailing 7-0, a 3rd & 3 incompletion into double coverage caused them to settle for a field goal. Those missing 4 points would prove key as they wound up trailing by 11 in the red zone with 2 minutes left in the game. Alas, red zone offense failed them again--they gained just 5.5 yards on four plays from the 18.5 (including a short-yardage plunge for a first) then suffered a sack-FF on fourth down to ice the game. Final score: 17-6, getting just 3 points on two red zone possessions. Congrats, Lions!

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WEEK 5 FAIL
BC Lions Red Zone Offense

pure greatness

Week 6 featured two very close games between potential playoff teams. But while you can make an argument for three of the four teams coming up clutch on both offense and defense, Dot Bilderberg fell apart in the final 4 minutes of their loss. In an exciting back-and-forth game with Oseberg, the two teams combined for TDs on 6 straight possessions and the Vikings took a 35-31 lead with just over six minutes left. It looked like it might be 7 straight as DB matriculated down the field for a first at the Oseberg 45 with four minutes remaining. But three plays later, it was 4th & 12.5, and a difficult go/punt decision with 2:28 left went badly: http://goallineblitz.com/game/replay.pl?game_id=2510348&pbp_id=2717449
There was still time. But a 6.5 yard gain on first down set Oseberg up to convert on third and short, burning two Bilderberg timeouts at which point they could only hope to get the ball with about 30 seconds left. Those slim hopes were quickly dashed as the Vikings broke 2 tackles for another fist down to ice it. Congrats, Agency!

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WEEK 6 FAIL
Dot Bilderberg Agency Final Four Minutes

Week 7 fail goes to Victoria's clock management. They played one heck of a game against Dallas, leading 16-14 at halftime, 23-21 after three quarters, before falling behind 30-35 with 3:11 left. Admittedly, this is a bit of a tricky situation as they could not just deploy the four minute offense given that they needed a TD. But they scored so fast (3 plays, 80 yards in 1:09) that Dallas got the ball back before the two minute warning, needing just a field goal to take the lead.
That put the game in the hands of Victoria's defense, who proceeded to let Dallas into field goal range immediately, and the Paladins took their first timeout with 1:20 left at the Tea 38.5. A stop at this point might have resulted in a miss field goal or at least would have gotten the ball back with plenty of time left. Instead Victoria allowed 3 more first downs, tick, tick, tick. Dallas inexplicably spiked the ball twice with goal to go, but still kicked a chip shot go-ahead field goal with 25 seconds left.
At this point Victoria's offense had time for about 3 plays to get into field goal range. But unlike the big plays they had in their previous drive, this time they settled for gains of 10 and 8.5, then threw incomplete. With 4 seconds left they completed another short pass to cross midfield but the clock ran out, leaving them with one timeout still on the board. Congrats, Teabaggers!

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WEEK 7 FAIL
Victoria Teabaggers Clock Management

We finally made it!!

I told the rFB to take a knee before scoring but that greedy bastard kept on running.