Passing
-----------------
How about that Oklahoma Thunder passing game ?
George W. Bush -- 51.5 att/game, 63% comp, 7.5 yds/att, 11.8 yds/comp, 70 TDs, 19 INTs. He only gets sacked once every 43 attempts ! (And one INT for every 43 attempts as well.)
W was very close to becoming a QB who was sacked more than hurried.... Those who fall into that category include Oregon's Knob McDude and Austin's Chet McLawson.
You may remember from the commercials that "Chicks Dig the Longball". No word on if chicks dig him, but Carolina's Jerry Snell led all the real starters in yds/att & yds/comp. Mad props to Carolina's OL for protecting him while waiting for his receivers to get downfield.
Rushing
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The Monkeys' Big Red Stomper was a major homerun hitter averaging 8.4 yds/carry with 42 TDs while only having 18 touches a game. That's a TD every 7.1 touches ! Grezbor Quam from the Sphere had a more impressive #, but still... Allen Rainey Jr. from the Spartans had a TD every 5 rushes !
Allen had 27 TDs coming into the year and 58 this season. Wow.
This Washed Up Rock Star had fumblitis. It's no suprise that Vanilla Ice averaged a fumble every 27 touches and was tied for the league lead in fumbles. Guy couldn't carry a tune or the ball apparently.
Receiving
----------------
Jimmy Turner had a quiet season to say the least. However, he managed to lead the league in receiving TDs, and have a TD at least once every 4 catches.
If you're looking for guys who can put up the RAC yardage (5.8), look no further than the Monkey's Larry Legend and Carolina's oddly-named Cell Phone. (I guess he can really "dial-it-in"... sorry, couldn't resist.)
I don't even have a joke about this... OJ McDuffie drops the ball a lot.
Returners
---------------
Not much to say... It appears that Grezbor Quam is pretty damn good. Sphere love their special teams. FIN.
(Moving on....)
Kickers
--------------
Apparently stamina becomes important for kickers. The two leading kickers in XPA & XPM aren't even in the top 20 in XP %. Austin's Righty Surely and the Hitmen's Clutch Legg surely need a break. Let those Punters kick some XPs !
Punters
--------------
Congrats to the Warlocks CoffinCorner Cruiser for punting 240 times in a season. That is truly embarrassing.
Defense
----------------
The Wafers' Anthony Scirrotto had 146 tackles and only 9 missed. Mighty impressive.
And the Hitmen's Runstuffer McBadass did complete the season with 32 hurries and 0 sacks. Life is tough with stubby arms.
On the other extreme, the Thunder's Pennington Leftwich must have long arms 34 sacks and only 11 hurries. If he gets near ya, you're going down.
Major news... in the final game of the season, the Monkeys' Terrell Buckley #27, managed his first INT of the season after having 39 passes defensed without picking one. Congratulations ! That means the league leader in PDs w/o an INT is now... the Hammer's Hukton Vioxx.
Oklahoma's Brian Johnson only had 40 tackles, but forced 6 fumbles. The man doesn't appear to hit often, but when he does, look out !
-----------------
How about that Oklahoma Thunder passing game ?
George W. Bush -- 51.5 att/game, 63% comp, 7.5 yds/att, 11.8 yds/comp, 70 TDs, 19 INTs. He only gets sacked once every 43 attempts ! (And one INT for every 43 attempts as well.)
W was very close to becoming a QB who was sacked more than hurried.... Those who fall into that category include Oregon's Knob McDude and Austin's Chet McLawson.
You may remember from the commercials that "Chicks Dig the Longball". No word on if chicks dig him, but Carolina's Jerry Snell led all the real starters in yds/att & yds/comp. Mad props to Carolina's OL for protecting him while waiting for his receivers to get downfield.
Rushing
----------------
The Monkeys' Big Red Stomper was a major homerun hitter averaging 8.4 yds/carry with 42 TDs while only having 18 touches a game. That's a TD every 7.1 touches ! Grezbor Quam from the Sphere had a more impressive #, but still... Allen Rainey Jr. from the Spartans had a TD every 5 rushes !
Allen had 27 TDs coming into the year and 58 this season. Wow.
This Washed Up Rock Star had fumblitis. It's no suprise that Vanilla Ice averaged a fumble every 27 touches and was tied for the league lead in fumbles. Guy couldn't carry a tune or the ball apparently.
Receiving
----------------
Jimmy Turner had a quiet season to say the least. However, he managed to lead the league in receiving TDs, and have a TD at least once every 4 catches.
If you're looking for guys who can put up the RAC yardage (5.8), look no further than the Monkey's Larry Legend and Carolina's oddly-named Cell Phone. (I guess he can really "dial-it-in"... sorry, couldn't resist.)
I don't even have a joke about this... OJ McDuffie drops the ball a lot.
Returners
---------------
Not much to say... It appears that Grezbor Quam is pretty damn good. Sphere love their special teams. FIN.
(Moving on....)
Kickers
--------------
Apparently stamina becomes important for kickers. The two leading kickers in XPA & XPM aren't even in the top 20 in XP %. Austin's Righty Surely and the Hitmen's Clutch Legg surely need a break. Let those Punters kick some XPs !
Punters
--------------
Congrats to the Warlocks CoffinCorner Cruiser for punting 240 times in a season. That is truly embarrassing.
Defense
----------------
The Wafers' Anthony Scirrotto had 146 tackles and only 9 missed. Mighty impressive.
And the Hitmen's Runstuffer McBadass did complete the season with 32 hurries and 0 sacks. Life is tough with stubby arms.
On the other extreme, the Thunder's Pennington Leftwich must have long arms 34 sacks and only 11 hurries. If he gets near ya, you're going down.
Major news... in the final game of the season, the Monkeys' Terrell Buckley #27, managed his first INT of the season after having 39 passes defensed without picking one. Congratulations ! That means the league leader in PDs w/o an INT is now... the Hammer's Hukton Vioxx.
Oklahoma's Brian Johnson only had 40 tackles, but forced 6 fumbles. The man doesn't appear to hit often, but when he does, look out !
You should still get 20 touches a game. We'll see how that even works out, might not end up changing a whole lot.
