Warrior General Games

Kenyan Sun Sentinel
Shamus McGrew

In a startling development the Sentinel has learned of a secret tryst between UN star Freddie Mitchell and Cairo receiver Dirty Dirt Diggler(also known as D3). Sentinel sources report the Mitchell and D3 checked into Kenya Vista, a 5 star hotel in Mombasa, late Monday evening. The Vista's concierge reports that several bottles of champagne and baskets of strawberries were sent to the room and that no other guests entered while Mitchell and D3 were registered.

Other disturbing reports were made by other members of the Vista staff. Most notably from the cleaning staff were the reports of used condoms(extra small), jars of K-Y, and a new DVD from FredXXX titled ManLoving.

Mitchell's and D3's agents were not available for comment.

lol

that's just disturbing...

Obviously they hired a midget couple to have have sex while they filmed for a new DVD... they just hid them under their coats on the way in. It's all very logical.

Freddie Mitchell has released a press statement regarding these allegations:


"Now, I have to go back to work on getting ready for the Brownie Eaters game, and I was working on it until pretty late last night. But I want to say one thing to the African people. I want you to listen to me. I'm going to say this again: I did not have sexual relations with that running back, Dirty Dirt Diggler. I never told anybody to lie, not a single time; never. These allegations are false, and I need to go back to work for the good people of Africa. Thank you."

Mitchell is also planning to sue the Kenyan Sun Sentinel into oblivion, and has reassured the fans that the extra small condoms did not belong to him by releasing a new "Fred-XXX" film, titled "Freddie Goes Long, Vol. 3"

His outstanding legal team has proven that "ManLoving" is a fraudulent tape that was made by a few Morocco players after their 104-0 loss to the Peacekeepers, and that the footage of Freddie was shot by a Morocco player who snuck into the UN locker room after the game.

Also, approximately 37 women have voluntarily confirmed that Mitchell was at a local "Freddie's Foxxes" club on Monday night, following UN's 24-13 victory over the Seattle NEThawks.

A little bold for the new QB of the last place team to make these accusations...

Reports coming out of the D3 camp were not surpising. D3 who was unavailable for comments had lead staff members address this breaking scandal.

Lead staff gave detailed accounts as to the whereabouts of the cocky RB. D3 was no where near Mombasa they stated. Camera footage of D3 involved in gaming activties at a local casino in Cairo were released. The video footage is timed stamp and proves that D3 was in fact miles away from the hotel in question.

Lead staff went on to add that this is just one of the many stunts pulled by the Mitchell camp and is not the first time the WR has been seen with a D3 look alike.

Staff: Mitchell is obessed with D3, and its not surpising hes having late night relations with look alikes. Yes we have heard his statements and his plans to sue but frankly we wouldnt be surpised if he was behind this whole scandal and truely belive he is.

lol you guys... this is funny.

It was also noted that the D3 camp plans to sue whoever is behind this disturbeding attempt to discredit the great superstar known as D3.

They added whoever is behind this better have a damn good lawyer.

Freddie Mitchell, standing on the sideline of the practice field, took a minute to address D3's claims:

"What?! He said I'm having sex with ME-3 look alikes? Well congrats ME-3, guess whose name I just added to my $500 million defamation lawsuit. Start looking into homeless shelters, because I'm suing your ass into bankruptcy, bitch"

"My lawyers don't want me to talk about it, so all I'll say is that Franchise Freddie played no part in this scandal, and the condoms AREN'T MINE"

Originally posted by sndhillshntr
A little bold for the new QB of the last place team to make these accusations...

When asked about his involvement in the recent scandal involving FredEx and D3 Guns McCloed of the Morocco Flames had this to say:

"I didn't have anything to do with these allegations. Whatever those two want to do behind closed doors is fine with me. I'm just glad it ain't going on in my locker room. I sure don't no one checking out my package in the shower. Does make you wonder if the next FredXXX movie will be shot exclusively from the UN shower. If it stars Mitchell though I guess they'll have to call it '4th and Short'."

Originally posted by ryan20662
Originally posted by sndhillshntr

A little bold for the new QB of the last place team to make these accusations...

When asked about his involvement in the recent scandal involving FredEx and D3 Guns McCloed of the Morocco Flames had this to say:

"I didn't have anything to do with these allegations. Whatever those two want to do behind closed doors is fine with me. I'm just glad it ain't going on in my locker room. I sure don't no one checking out my package in the shower. Does make you wonder if the next FredXXX movie will be shot exclusively from the UN shower. If it stars Mitchell though I guess they'll have to call it '4th and Short'."


ROFL at the 4th and short comment

bump

bumping dead posts is bad, really ones that mock God!