There aren't enough games that qualify week 7 as an Epic Half-way marker but there are a few interesting never seen before matchups between the tail end of cross division foes that's worth our attention.
"Revenge! Nah...I'm too lazy. I'm going to sit here and let Karma fuck you up"-
(2-4) Live Oak Eagles vs (6-0) 1995 Nebraska Cornhuskers
Nebraska's HB Damen Benning is on a constant roll, having rushed for 171, 173 and 199 yards in back-to-back-to-back games.
The fan's of Damen Benning are encouraging the team to feed the beast more
Nebraska Defense is as ugly as a bulldog chewing on a wasp and I mean that as a compliment.
LB Octavious "The Minister of Defense" Mcfarlin is an absolute monster. A real game changer in Adams with his stellar pass rushing abilities- freak of nature and virtually impossible to block when coming off the edges. He'll hit you so hard, it will un-curl every single pubic hair on your genital.
The Eagles defense has been pretty good against the pass this season, but being a mediocre run stopping defense at best, there will be multiple lanes as wide as race tracks for both Ahman and Damen- Hell...there's even room for Dante at the dinner table.
Nebraska's defense will stifle the Eagles and QB Torance Hatch; the Defending Champs will improve to 7-0.
(1-5) Pittsburgh Titans vs (5-1)Gangsta Wit it'
This game between Pittsburgh and Gangsta is a showcase of two teams heading in opposite directions.
Gangsta with only one defeat, already match their win total from all of season 4, and their defense leads the league.
DE Robo Boss is making a legitimate case for Defensive Player of the Year with his performance thus far. Robo Boss has an unreal burst off the line of scrimmage. He’s also strong enough to engage blockers when they get into his frame and shed them away. Robo’s nose for the ball is phenomenal, and he has all the athletic tools to back it up.
The Titans, meanwhile, have been shut out in four contest and all 4 in Major blowout fashion.
Gangsta Wit it can play their worst possible game and it still wouldn't be enough to get Pittsburgh the win. boldtroll have his team firing on all cylinders, and it won't fall short to any CPU team. Sex with your eyes open and work boots on- Happy Friday!!!
(3-3) LaPaz Challengers vs (4-2) LUELinks LUEshis
Even though the LUELinks LUEshis lost to the Goddesses last week (I know that pain was as real as accidentally sitting on your balls) , incidentally the game did feature a positive development in the form of QB im a virgin. The first time where chaos surrounded the team and it was as ice chips were flowing through his veins.
LUELinks QB im a virgin will have another big game, connecting early and often with WR Alexander Thomas and TE
Jerry Sandusky Tickle Time.
-Is it me or are the Challengers in deep shit?
-Beginning of a downward spiral slump or a short regression?
They're all fair questions to ask when one team starts 3-0 and then turn around and lose 3 straight games.
However the Owner and his humbled staff have been down this road several times so if anyone can ride this shit storm out- Peter Venkman and friends are the ones you lean on.
However, an un-armed pass coverage Challengers won't be able to keep up with the LUELinks Air Raid.
There's little debate that the game will be a one sided shootout
Expect the LUEshis to make you reach for your ankles, with WR Alexander Thomas accounting for possibly a pair of touchdowns in the win. In fact, Alexander will play so well that the game will be over by the first half.
LUELinks will leave LaPaz scratching their asshole and then biting their fingernails
(4-2) Pawnee Goddesses vs (5-1) Minnesota Stunners
Perhaps no game this week will generate more hype than Pawnee's HB Beast Bailey to battle the Stunners, and their lightning in a bottle, HB Jimbo Jumpback who will make you forget all about a happy ending. You can either love him, hate him or masturbate while screaming his name- It's the thought that counts. Unquestionably the game of the week.
Both Teams are excellent and respected when it comes huge games. Stunners in particular will be motivated to eviscerate any team in their way. It just doesn't feel right being in 2nd place.
HB Beast Bailey is no slouch in his own right, having flashed the form of an elite HB in his 6 Adam starts. Pawnee is determined to show the league that they can be every bit as special as the Greatest.
The Goddesses will give it their best shot, but Minnesota three headed monsters in Jimbo, Herc and Cross inflict too much of a handicap toward their opponents and almost unchallenged will rake Pawnee over the coals.
(1-5) Winnipeg Wrath vs (0-6) Redmond's Imposters
This game doesn't exactly have the sizzle that both teams would like, as the one win Winnipeg Wrath host the defeated Redmond's Imposters.
If I were to lit an orphanage on fire the night before Christmas, I still wouldn't be as bad as these two teams been playing.
Good things do not come to those who wait...They come to those who fucking go out and earn it.
Despite the poor records of the participants, the contest will be hallmark with plenty of fireworks, most notably from Wrath QB
Ned Simmons. He will shred the Imposters defense like a hot knife through butter.
Redmond's defense has proven to be completely incompetent on the season and will likely make new Wrath quarterback Ned Simmons look like the 2nd coming of QB Straight Cash Homie. It's all fun and games until someone drink the beer with the cigarette butts in it.
Ned Simmons will lead Winnepeg to victory and continuing the Imposters misery, dropping them to 0-7.
(3-3) Rare Breed Rookies vs (2-4) Eastern European Alliance
Eastern European Alliance passing attack have been totally out of sync. QB Ernest P. Worrell wasn't on the same page last game with his wide outs and it cost them.
Fast-forward to now, and the Alliance aerial assault is still doubtful, O-line slightly looking better but Defense is a no-show and it appears as if the owner is much like the French Army and throwing in the towel early.
Despite the disparity, expect Eastern to come out and play well. European simply has too many good players to keep getting embarrassed, and they will play with pride against the Rookies.
I would like to think Rare Breed will find ways to harass QB Ernest P. Worrell all game. The Rookies had a few extra days to prepare for this game coming off a recent match with the Imposters that required them to do nothing but show up.
There's a new Sheriff in Pass Happy town and it's not Ernest P.
Few quarterbacks displayed the timing, ball placement and accuracy that Blake Bortles have (6’6”, 220 lbs, Jefferson's League Season 4 runner up for TD's, Passing yards and MVP). His passes have the perfect touch and allows his targets to work effortlessly for catches. Even under pressure, Bortles is rarely rattled and throws with command and deadly accuracy.
Breed Rookies will get close enough to kiss you and then twist the blade into your navel. Rare win by double digits.
"Revenge! Nah...I'm too lazy. I'm going to sit here and let Karma fuck you up"-
(2-4) Live Oak Eagles vs (6-0) 1995 Nebraska Cornhuskers
Nebraska's HB Damen Benning is on a constant roll, having rushed for 171, 173 and 199 yards in back-to-back-to-back games.
The fan's of Damen Benning are encouraging the team to feed the beast more
Nebraska Defense is as ugly as a bulldog chewing on a wasp and I mean that as a compliment.
LB Octavious "The Minister of Defense" Mcfarlin is an absolute monster. A real game changer in Adams with his stellar pass rushing abilities- freak of nature and virtually impossible to block when coming off the edges. He'll hit you so hard, it will un-curl every single pubic hair on your genital.
The Eagles defense has been pretty good against the pass this season, but being a mediocre run stopping defense at best, there will be multiple lanes as wide as race tracks for both Ahman and Damen- Hell...there's even room for Dante at the dinner table.
Nebraska's defense will stifle the Eagles and QB Torance Hatch; the Defending Champs will improve to 7-0.
(1-5) Pittsburgh Titans vs (5-1)Gangsta Wit it'
This game between Pittsburgh and Gangsta is a showcase of two teams heading in opposite directions.
Gangsta with only one defeat, already match their win total from all of season 4, and their defense leads the league.
DE Robo Boss is making a legitimate case for Defensive Player of the Year with his performance thus far. Robo Boss has an unreal burst off the line of scrimmage. He’s also strong enough to engage blockers when they get into his frame and shed them away. Robo’s nose for the ball is phenomenal, and he has all the athletic tools to back it up.
The Titans, meanwhile, have been shut out in four contest and all 4 in Major blowout fashion.
Gangsta Wit it can play their worst possible game and it still wouldn't be enough to get Pittsburgh the win. boldtroll have his team firing on all cylinders, and it won't fall short to any CPU team. Sex with your eyes open and work boots on- Happy Friday!!!
(3-3) LaPaz Challengers vs (4-2) LUELinks LUEshis
Even though the LUELinks LUEshis lost to the Goddesses last week (I know that pain was as real as accidentally sitting on your balls) , incidentally the game did feature a positive development in the form of QB im a virgin. The first time where chaos surrounded the team and it was as ice chips were flowing through his veins.
LUELinks QB im a virgin will have another big game, connecting early and often with WR Alexander Thomas and TE
Jerry Sandusky Tickle Time.
-Is it me or are the Challengers in deep shit?
-Beginning of a downward spiral slump or a short regression?
They're all fair questions to ask when one team starts 3-0 and then turn around and lose 3 straight games.
However the Owner and his humbled staff have been down this road several times so if anyone can ride this shit storm out- Peter Venkman and friends are the ones you lean on.
However, an un-armed pass coverage Challengers won't be able to keep up with the LUELinks Air Raid.
There's little debate that the game will be a one sided shootout
Expect the LUEshis to make you reach for your ankles, with WR Alexander Thomas accounting for possibly a pair of touchdowns in the win. In fact, Alexander will play so well that the game will be over by the first half.
LUELinks will leave LaPaz scratching their asshole and then biting their fingernails
(4-2) Pawnee Goddesses vs (5-1) Minnesota Stunners
Perhaps no game this week will generate more hype than Pawnee's HB Beast Bailey to battle the Stunners, and their lightning in a bottle, HB Jimbo Jumpback who will make you forget all about a happy ending. You can either love him, hate him or masturbate while screaming his name- It's the thought that counts. Unquestionably the game of the week.
Both Teams are excellent and respected when it comes huge games. Stunners in particular will be motivated to eviscerate any team in their way. It just doesn't feel right being in 2nd place.
HB Beast Bailey is no slouch in his own right, having flashed the form of an elite HB in his 6 Adam starts. Pawnee is determined to show the league that they can be every bit as special as the Greatest.
The Goddesses will give it their best shot, but Minnesota three headed monsters in Jimbo, Herc and Cross inflict too much of a handicap toward their opponents and almost unchallenged will rake Pawnee over the coals.
(1-5) Winnipeg Wrath vs (0-6) Redmond's Imposters
This game doesn't exactly have the sizzle that both teams would like, as the one win Winnipeg Wrath host the defeated Redmond's Imposters.
If I were to lit an orphanage on fire the night before Christmas, I still wouldn't be as bad as these two teams been playing.
Good things do not come to those who wait...They come to those who fucking go out and earn it.
Despite the poor records of the participants, the contest will be hallmark with plenty of fireworks, most notably from Wrath QB
Ned Simmons. He will shred the Imposters defense like a hot knife through butter.
Redmond's defense has proven to be completely incompetent on the season and will likely make new Wrath quarterback Ned Simmons look like the 2nd coming of QB Straight Cash Homie. It's all fun and games until someone drink the beer with the cigarette butts in it.
Ned Simmons will lead Winnepeg to victory and continuing the Imposters misery, dropping them to 0-7.
(3-3) Rare Breed Rookies vs (2-4) Eastern European Alliance
Eastern European Alliance passing attack have been totally out of sync. QB Ernest P. Worrell wasn't on the same page last game with his wide outs and it cost them.
Fast-forward to now, and the Alliance aerial assault is still doubtful, O-line slightly looking better but Defense is a no-show and it appears as if the owner is much like the French Army and throwing in the towel early.
Despite the disparity, expect Eastern to come out and play well. European simply has too many good players to keep getting embarrassed, and they will play with pride against the Rookies.
I would like to think Rare Breed will find ways to harass QB Ernest P. Worrell all game. The Rookies had a few extra days to prepare for this game coming off a recent match with the Imposters that required them to do nothing but show up.
There's a new Sheriff in Pass Happy town and it's not Ernest P.
Few quarterbacks displayed the timing, ball placement and accuracy that Blake Bortles have (6’6”, 220 lbs, Jefferson's League Season 4 runner up for TD's, Passing yards and MVP). His passes have the perfect touch and allows his targets to work effortlessly for catches. Even under pressure, Bortles is rarely rattled and throws with command and deadly accuracy.
Breed Rookies will get close enough to kiss you and then twist the blade into your navel. Rare win by double digits.
