(Originally written by Novus. Feel free to pass it around, re-post it, or whatever. Just include this line when you do so, please. Thanks!)
Isn't it great that a team in the bottom-tier of the league structure can lose their first round playoff game 213-0 and still get promoted straight up to Elite #2 the following season without having to spend time in Competitive first? Just ask the Chimneyville Defenders in National Minor Elite #2. (
http://goallineblitz.com/game/team.pl?team_id=4780 ) Sure, they're a Level 28 team in a league full of Level 46 players, but they're living the dream in Elite, and I'm sure they'll be able to hold their opponents under 200 points all season long.
Sadly, these sorts of "What the f---?" stories are depressingly common in GLB this season. I just spent the past 90 minutes looking at all of the Pro leagues and all of the Elite leagues on the full-AI side of GLB, running Pabst's Player Value To League Page script on each league to look for teams that were very obviously out-of-place. These teams need to get bumped down one or two notches and replaced with teams that will actually be able to compete.
The biggest consistent source of these sorts of mis-placed teams are teams who made the playoffs in the bottom tier and automatically got promoted up to Elite because of it, even if they only made it into the playoffs as an 8-seed and got destroyed by 200 in the first round. Considering that most bottom-tier leagues are composed of gut-jobs and CPU teams, a freaking
trained monkey could make the playoffs in that situation. Does that mean the trained monkey belongs in Elite #1? No, it doesn't.
Remember, it only took me 90 minutes to put this list together, and I did it while holding a sleeping baby. If I can do it, then Bort and Catch can spare a staffer to do it once every off-season.
Without further ado, here's the list!
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African Pro
http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=832 CPU teams. Why not swap them out with 2 Regional Pro teams?
Eastern Europe Pro
http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=111 team with an empty roster (P-Town Baby Bulls) and 1 team with just 1 human dot (The Legion's Stalingrad Gryphon Army). Again, why not swap them out with 2 Regional Pro teams?
Oceania Pro
http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=171 CPU team, 1 team with an empty roster (Syracuse Synergy) and 1 team with just 1 human dot (All Good Things).
Southeast Asia Pro
http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=131 CPU team, 1 team with an empty roster (NBA Jam Extreme), and 1 team (The Eye Of Horus) who got promoted straight from Regional Pro Competitive #6 to SE Asia Pro and skipped Elite despite losing in the 2nd round of the playoffs and despite being outleveled by 4 to 16 levels by every other team in their new league. Why didn't The Eye Of Horus get promoted up to just Regional Pro Elite to see if they could hack it there first before sending them up to Southeast Asia Pro to get slaughtered?
USA Pro
http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=11 team with an empty roster (LUElinks LUEshis), and 1 team with only 12 dots on their roster (Tennessee Bandits).
Western Europe Pro
http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=93 teams with woefully incomplete rosters: Metz Metal Militia (12 dots), Oslofjorden Seagulls (3 dots), and Philadelphia Marauders II (2 dots).
Regional Pro Elite #1
http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=21 CPU team, 1 team with an empty roster (Fulham Flying Hoodfish), and a slow-build team (Genco Olive Oil) who got promoted from Regional Pro #11 straight up to Regional Pro Elite #1 and skipped Competitive despite having an average level of 38 when everyone else in their new league is in the 50s or higher.
Semi Pro Elite #1
http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=261 team with an empty roster (Montreal Gaulois), plus two slow-build teams (Dubuque WarHawks and Indy Horseshoes) who got promoted from the bottom rung of National Minor straight up to the top rung of National Semi Pro and skipped Competitive despite the fact that they'll be outleveled by at least 13 levels in their new league.
National Minor Elite #1
http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=371 team with an empty roster (Winnipeg Jets) and 1 team with only 11 dots (Malicious Bengals).
National Minor Elite #2
http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=381 CPU team, 1 team with 1 dot (UND Fighting Sioux), 1 team with only 11 dot (Legion of Doom), and the Chimneyville Defenders, who clawed their way up into Elite #2 through a brilliant two-step method: make it to the playoffs in the bottom rung of Regional Minor, then lose in the first round of the playoffs 213-0. Yeah, they belong in Elite! Move 'em on up and skip Competitive!
Regional Minor Elite #1
http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=1371 team with 8 dots (So Cal Marauders), 1 team with 17 dots (Guam Turkeys), and Munqui Tribe, who jumped from the bottom rung of Local Minor straight up to Elite #1 in Regional Minor by making the playoffs and then losing in the 2nd round 252-7. No need to put them in Competitive... send 'em on up to Elite! They'll do fine! Who cares if they're out-leveled by at least 8?
Regional Minor Elite #2
http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=1381 team with 8 dots (Transylvania Pioneers), plus The Irrational Homeless Kittens who made the playoffs in the bottom rung of Local Minor and promptly lost 94-6 in the first round. They bypassed Competitive and went straight up to Elite #2, where they're outleveled by at least 12.
Local Minor Elite #1
http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=1451 team with an empty roster (Guahan Taotaomon'as), and 1 team with only 13 dots (North Dayton Black Rhinos).
Local Minor Elite #2
http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=1461 team with only 3 dots (Lost Island Smoke Monsters) and 1 team with only 6 dots (Auburn Trojans).
University Elite #2
http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=1001 team with only 2 dots (Nashville Snipers).
Prep Elite #1
http://goallineblitz.com/game/league.pl?league_id=2031 team with an empty roster (Pain Gang).