MaRAWK!!o offices were raided today by agents of the Treasury Department today after recent audits have shown that the organization did not have enough cash to back their obligations. It is widely believed that MaRAWK!!o is highly invested in collateralized, goat backed loans. These loans were a complex financial instrument developed during the goat bubble of the last decade.
Not having enough cash on the books means the Treasury Department will take over operations of the team starting on Day 41 and will not be renewing any contracts. All team assets will be sold off in order to help pay off outstanding debt.
Questions have recently arisen around MaRAWK!!o’s goat related assets in recent months. Insiders, who have either remained anonymous or disappeared with no trace, have told intrepid reporters that the goats seem to disappear for a day or two and then suddenly appear in Billsaidsux’s account…only to disappear in another day or two. Federal Investigators are looking into possible connections with underground goat trafficking.
The Treasury Department will hold an auction for the following items. Interested bidders please contact league reps for details:
1. Two unnecessary “!”
2. A huge amount of liquor. Huge may be understating it a bit actually.
3. One ludicrously expensive MaRAWK!!otron 6000
4. A bunch of furniture from the insanely opulent and huge owner’s suite. Most of it has been sat on rarely but slept on often.
5. One coach’s desk and a FredEx nameplate (never used)
6. One trophy case (never used)
Not having enough cash on the books means the Treasury Department will take over operations of the team starting on Day 41 and will not be renewing any contracts. All team assets will be sold off in order to help pay off outstanding debt.
Questions have recently arisen around MaRAWK!!o’s goat related assets in recent months. Insiders, who have either remained anonymous or disappeared with no trace, have told intrepid reporters that the goats seem to disappear for a day or two and then suddenly appear in Billsaidsux’s account…only to disappear in another day or two. Federal Investigators are looking into possible connections with underground goat trafficking.
The Treasury Department will hold an auction for the following items. Interested bidders please contact league reps for details:
1. Two unnecessary “!”
2. A huge amount of liquor. Huge may be understating it a bit actually.
3. One ludicrously expensive MaRAWK!!otron 6000
4. A bunch of furniture from the insanely opulent and huge owner’s suite. Most of it has been sat on rarely but slept on often.
5. One coach’s desk and a FredEx nameplate (never used)
6. One trophy case (never used)
