I know, I know, I know, when you read the Sport's Page you just want to dance the night away..................
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iH9ozkHsRtY
It's not what I usually do at night, but dancing the night away doesn't involve a jar of lube and a tube sock.
It's week 6!!
How the hell did we make it to week 6 already?!?!
I don't really care, but it is goin' by quick!
And if your team hasn't made a movement other than a bowel movement, you just might be out of it right when things are starting to heat the hell ups!!
So on to week 6!!!
The Free Agent Frenzy!!
Ok, so there is another place to go to market or work with others to get some quality free agents to help your team out.
It's called the Free Agent Frenzy!!
It's in it's second season and maybe you will find what you are looking for there.
Need a shut down corner? He could be there.
Need a pass rushing god? He could be there.
Need a power HB or pass blocking OT? They could be there.
All you have to do is send a PM to this dude and tell him SA sent ya' from the Sport's Page and he'll let you in.
http://goallineblitz.com/game/home.pl?user_id=201676
At least look at the avi. What great knockers she has!
Just trying to help the GLB community out any way I can.
SA's Player of the Week
And the POW goes to.....................
So Cal kicker Tom Gun! Yay!
Tom Gun kicked the game winning FG in OT and save the BDC from having to stop the Navigators, who dominated the 4th quarter with 24 points.
Had Mr Gun missed that FG, I'm not too sure if the BDC would have stopped Lincoln and maybe cost them the win.
So here's to you, Tom Gun..............................
http://i378.photobucket.com/albums/oo227/jason41470/Warsteiner_4a9ec543d47f2.jpg
SALUTE!!!
True story.
When old Ben Franklin was flying his kite in the rain, he was heard shouting up at the sky....................
..............................LET'S DO THIS SHIT!!!
You may or may not agree with them, but this is how I see them.
****ALPHA CONFERENCE POWER RANKINGS****
LW = Last Week ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched
#1 Chocolate Blaze (5-0) LW1 - GOW once again!
Next opponent: at #4 Indianapolis Gurupies (4-1)
#2 Warsaw Wrath (5-0) LW2 - Poor Grizzlies, they just got done getting their asses kicked and now they gets another.
Poor Grizzlies.
Next opponent: at #16 Graz Grizzlies (0-5)
#3 East St Louis Tire Fires (4-1) LW3 - It should be smooth sailing for you Tire Fires for the next 5 games until your big showdown with Warsaw.
Have fun.
Next opponent: at #11 Krungthep Garudas (2-3)
#4 Indianapolis Gurupies (4-1) LW4 - Big game awaits you in the GOW!
Next opponent: #1 Chocolate Blaze (5-0)
#5 Queen City Black Cats (3-2) LW7 - Nice way to turn things around!
You might be able to get two more wins to add to your 3 straight, then it's your big game against Warsaw.
Next opponent: at #7 NBA Jam (3-2)
#6 La Tourette Syndrome (3-2) LW8 - All I know is that if you guys want to win more often, you need to trade that lazy HB Johnson Chad.
The guy plays GLB fat, slow and stupid.
The only scoring he has done lately is on my ex and..........................wait a minute...............DAM YOU JOHNSON CHAD!!!.....................you slut.
Next opponent: at #10 Honolulu Hurricane Wife Carriers (2-3)
#7 NBA Jam (3-2) LW11 - Can you make it 2 wins in a row?
You need to stay consistent to hold on to that 7 spot or even move up.
So start "Heating up!!!"
Next opponent: #5 Queen City Black Cats (3-2)
#8 Providence Radicals (3-2) LW5 - Well that was a surprising loss, but it's your own dam fault.
Make a nice rebound win out of the White Rhino's, maybe that will cheer you guys up a bit.
Next opponent: at #13 Windhoek White Rhinos (1-4)
#9 Sparta Battle Chickens (3-2) LW6 - Don't take any chances this week. Go get the W over the Ghost Riders and get set for Warsaw after wards.
Next opponent: at #15 Ghost Riders In The Sky (1-4)
#10 Honolulu Hurricane Wife Carriers (2-3) LW13 - Great job getting the W overProvidence!
Can you make it 2 in a row?
Next opponent: #6 La Tourette Syndrome (3-2)
#11 Krungthep Garudas (2-3) LW9 - Well, you garudas better get ready for a very rocky road ahead.
ESL, Blaze and Gurupies in the next 4 games is a lot to handle.
So pick up the wins where tyou can, like H&D and any of the games after Indy, except for Warsaw.
There may still be enough shots at wins to grab that 8th spot.
Next opponent: #3 East St Louis Tire Fires (4-1)
#12 [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF] (2-3) LW10 - Right now the Wildfire are having troubles of their own, so it would be a great opportunity to get a win and even yourselves back up to .500.
Next opponent: at #14 October Wildfire (1-4)
#13 Windhoek White Rhinos (1-4) LW12 - Well you guys have to get off the losing track. That path usually leads straight to the Hot Chick Lounge.
Providence just lo0st to Honolulu, so there might be a chance for a win.
And La Tourette isn't completely out of the question, but after that are the Tire Fires and the Blaze.
You need a string of W's before this hole gets any deeper.
Next opponent: #8 Providence Radicals (3-2)
#14 October Wildfire (1-4) LW14 - Outstanding!
Superb!
Fan-fucking-tastic!
You guys really went all out and took the Tire Fires to the edge last week! I applaud your great effort, even if it came up a tad short.
But you guys put forth an extraordinary performance and I hope it continues.
The difference between ordinary and extraordinary, is that little extra.
Next opponent: #12 [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF] (2-3)
#15 Ghost Riders In The Sky (1-4) LW15 - Well this next game you will either win or you will lose, so let's not talk about that.
Let's talk about you. Especially your punter Diandra "Sweet Dee" Reynolds.
"It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" is hilarious!
Did you see the "Dayman Cometh" episode and how about Green Man? Oh, it is such funny shit.
What a great show. If you have never seen it, check it out on FX, you just might piss yourself.
Next opponent: #9 Sparta Battle Chickens (3-2)
#16 Graz Grizzlies (0-5) LW16 - Well Grizzlies, if you don't win this one (and you know it won't happen) I think you guys just might be the 1st Alpha team to go into the Hot Chick Lounge.
Next opponent: #2 Warsaw Wrath (5-0)
*****WEEK 6 ALPHA CONFERENCE PREDICTIONS*****
Here's my prediction record week by week.
Week 1: 7-1 Week 2: 6-2 Week 3: 6-2 Week 4: 7-1 Week 5: 5-3
Overall: 31-9
SA’s GOW: 5-0
Magic 8 Ball’s GOW: 3-2
#12 [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF] (2-3) at #14 October Wildfire (1-4) = October Wildfire
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#6 La Tourette Syndrome (3-2) at #10 Honolulu Hurricane Wife Carriers (2-3) = La Tourette Syndrome
Game Rating: 3/6 beers
#8 Providence Radicals (3-2) at #13 Windhoek White Rhinos (1-4) = Providence Radicals
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#9 Sparta Battle Chickens (3-2) at #15 Ghost Riders In The Sky (1-4) = Sparta Battle Chickens
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#5 Queen City Black Cats (3-2) at #7 NBA Jam (3-2) = Queen City Black Cats
Game Rating: 4/6 beers
#3 East St Louis Tire Fires (4-1) at #11 Krungthep Garudas (2-3) = East St Louis Tire Fires
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#2 Warsaw Wrath (5-0) at #16 Graz Grizzlies (0-5) = Warsaw Wrath
Game Rating: 1/6 beers
#1 Chocolate Blaze (5-0) at #4 Indianapolis Gurupies (4-1) = Chocolate Blaze
Game Rating: 6/6 beers
*Game Of The Week* (GOW)
#1 Chocolate Blaze (5-0) at #4 Indianapolis Gurupies (4-1) -
Chocolate and Indianapolis, these two kingdoms have been fighting each other since 1386 when they both had the same country nickname of "Passing Wind" and went to war over it.
I know, it is kinda' dumb to go to war over such a terrible nickname, but the Chocolate Blaze and the Indianapolis Gurupies both love "Passing Wind" so much that they made a big stink over it.
But the age old rivalry ends here dammit!!
No more fighting after this one!
No more killing after this one!
No more putting dog poop in a bag, lighting it on fire and ringing the other team's doorbell and running to hide in the bushes to watch the opponent come out and find said bag of poop on fire and stomp it out with their new pair of high heels that they like to wear in the privacy of their own home.
It's funny as shit.......BUT NO MORE!!!
So yo Bort! What say you quit thinking up ways to screw my player builds up and get to simmin' this mofo'!!
Magic 8 Ball says: http://av.vet.ksu.edu/flash/8ball
Question: Will the Blaze beat the Gurupies?
8 Ball's answer: My sources say no.
SA's Pick: Chocolate Blaze
Magic 8 Ball Pick: Indianapolis Gurupies
22/48 beers! – OK, so there isn't a lot going on this week, but there are 2 games that you should pound away some beers to.
The #5 Queen City Black Cats get ready to take on the #7 NBA Jam in a "Golden Shower Match"! I think you can guess what happens to the loser.
And the #1 Chocolate Blaze goes to Indiana, the Gurupie State, to take on the #4 Indianapolis Gurupies in the GOW!!
How's that for super happy fun GLB action this week?
Yep, it gives me a boner too.
Let’s do this shit!!
Good luck to all the teams in the Alpha!
____________________________________________________________________________
****ZETA CONFERENCE POWER RANKINGS****
LW = Last Week Ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched
#1 Valhalla (5-0) LW1 -
Ho-hum, ho-hum,
another win for Valhalla is so much fun.
Next opponent: #9 Porto Alegre Smugglers (2-3)
#2 Minneapolis Masterminds (4-1) LW2 - Another GOW? You truly are "Masterminds".
Next opponent: at #3 Dakar Dragons (4-1)
#3 Dakar Dragons (4-1) LW4 - Biggest test of the season waits you in the GOW this week!
Next opponent: #2 Minneapolis Masterminds (4-1)
#4 So Cal BDC (4-1) LW5 - Could be a tough battle here and you guys know that if you want to keep that top 4 rank you need to do what?..................win.
Next opponent: #7 Cincinnati Shockers (3-2)
#5 Moose Jaw Roughriders (4-1) LW6 - I know you guys are Roughriders and all, but when you get the win try to keep from doing all that extra rapin', pillagin' and/or plunderin' stuff or at least just do the rapin' part.
And no team would do any rapin', pillagin' and/or plunderin' without a Roughrider condom.
Roughrider is the only all organic condom and has been proven to be the #1 brand choice of those getting raped, pillaged and/or plundered.
So when the time calls for your team to rape, pillage and/or plunder, choose Roughrider.
Next opponent: at #10 Mayan Prophecy (2-3)
#6 Lincoln Navigators (3-2) LW3 - Well C-Town is in a bit of disarray right now, so maybe phone in the win this week. Just call the C-Town stadium officials and tell them you are thinking of showing up for the game and they should go ahead and surrender the W by phone.
Good luck.
Next opponent: at #13 C-Town Hoodlums (1-4)
#7 Cincinnati Shockers (3-2) LW10 - OK Cincy! 3-2 and now you've got somethin' to prove!
This game will decide whether you gots what it takes or you're just gettin' taken out!
Time to Shock the world..................or at least a small part of southern California.
Next opponent: at #4 So Cal BDC (4-1)
#8 Ministry of Dotball (2-3) LW7 - If your QB Elmer Fudd can stop hunting wabbits and start hunting spidah's, you guys may just end up with a W.
Next opponent: #12 Sofia Spiders (1-4)
#9 Porto Alegre Smugglers (2-3) LW8 - Alright team! I think we can turn this thing around! All we need is some wins and we are back in this thing and...................wha?.................you are playing Valhalla next?.............................never mind.
Next opponent: at #1 Valhalla (5-0)
#10 Mayan Prophecy (2-3) LW9 - OK, I really want to help you guys out. So I've been looking through these ancient writings where you get your prophecies from.
I've spent hours and hours learning the language and customs of the ancient and proud people of the Maya.
I spent minutes boning women from the Maya peninsula and have studied the philosophies of the ancient Maya people and their leaders, kings and shamans.
And I think I've unlocked the secret to winning the next game for you.........oh, hold on one sec...................yes, Pizza Guy? I'll take a super supreme Big Hoss sausage pizza and an order of Burning Ass hot wings and a small diet Pepsi, thanks.........sorry about that, but it's lunch time and I got to go pick up my pizza.
See you next week.
Next opponent: #5 Moose Jaw Roughriders (4-1)
#11 Bonn Dynamo (2-3) LW11 - College Town should mean a win and a week end party.
Don't you just love going back to school?
Next opponent: #14 College Town NWA Feeble Minds (1-4)
#12 Sofia Spiders (1-4) LW13 - Congrats Spiders! You finally got your name in the W column! The leg countdown has been stopped for now.
MoD and Prophecy aren't out of reach as far as W's are concerned, so go for 2.
Next opponent: at #8 Ministry of Dotball (2-3)
#13 C-Town Hoodlums (1-4) LW12 - Well you guys have a string of very tough games up next. Lincoln, Cincy, SoCal, MoD, Prophecy, Valhalla. It doesn't bode well for the home team.
But just keep the team motto in mind when you play these tough games: http://i45.tinypic.com/29n8hl4.jpg
Hopefully you can turn things around and make a run for the 8 spot or end up in the HCL and hit the G-Spot.
Next opponent: #6 Lincoln Navigators (3-2
#14 College Town NWA Feeble Minds (1-4) LW14 - Yay! Way to go feeble Mind'ers! You got win #1 on the season and proved you aren't the shit that sinks to the bottom of the toilet. (see two teams below)
Now let's give it the old college try and go for 2
Next opponent: at #11 Bonn Dynamo (2-3)
#15 Korb Destroyers (0-5) LW15 - OK, Korbites, you need to win this one to prove that you are NOT quite ready for the Hot Chick Lounge.
If there is any life left in you Destroyers, now is the time to pull the rabbit out of the pants.
At least that's what my Uncle Morty used to do in his magic show. Poor Uncle Morty can't do his tricks for another 3-5 years with good behavior.
Next opponent: #16 Machu Picchu Hidden Dragons (0-5)
#16 Machu Picchu Hidden Dragons (0-5) LW16 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2001/10brandy/Brandy-21.jpg
Next opponent: at #15 Korb Destroyers (0-5)
*****WEEK 6 ZETA CONFERENCE PREDICTIONS*****
Here's my prediction record week by week.
Week 1: 4-4 Week 2: 4-4 Week 3: 6-2 Week 4: 6-2 Week 5: 5-3
Overall: 25-15
SA’s GOW: 4-1
Magic 8 Ball’s GOW: 3-2
#2 Minneapolis Masterminds (4-1) at #3 Dakar Dragons (4-1) = Minneapolis Masterminds
Game Rating: 6/6 beers
#7 Cincinnati Shockers (3-2) at #4 So Cal BDC (4-1) = So Cal BDC
Game Rating: 5/6 beers
#9 Porto Alegre Smugglers (2-3) at #1 Valhalla (5-0) = Valhalla
Game Rating: 3/6 beers
#5 Moose Jaw Roughriders (4-1) at #10 Mayan Prophecy (2-3) = Moose Jaw Roughriders
Game Rating: 3/6 beers
#12 Sofia Spiders (1-4) at #8 Ministry of Dotball (2-3) = Ministry of Dotball
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#6 Lincoln Navigators (3-2) at #13 C-Town Hoodlums (1-4) = Lincoln Navigators
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#14 College Town NWA Feeble Minds (1-4) at #11 Bonn Dynamo (2-3) = Bonn Dynamo
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#16 Machu Picchu Hidden Dragons (0-5) at #15 Korb Destroyers (0-5) = Korb Destroyers
Game Rating: 1/6 beers
*Game Of The Week* (GOW)
#2 Minneapolis Masterminds (4-1) at #3 Dakar Dragons (4-1) -
#2 vs #3!
Masterminds take on the Dragons in a top 4 war!!
Send it to Thunder Dome!!
Two teams enter!
One team leaves!
If the Dragons win, it proves they may be legit!
If they lose, they suck!
If the Masterminds win, it's just another win!
If the Masterminds lose, they will be Master-baters!
Flying around castles, breathing fire and terrorizing damsels in distress?
YES!!
Mastering your own mind, creating a GLB team and calling it the Masterminds?
DONE!!!
Taking long walks on short piers and pushing your opponent in the water?
Lame, but..................DO IT!!!!
Yo Bort! It's time to get to simmin' and see which team gets all wet!
Magic 8 Ball says: http://av.vet.ksu.edu/flash/8ball
Question: Will the Masterminds beat the Dragons?
8 Ball's answer: As I see it, yes.
SA's Pick: Minneapolis Masterminds
Magic 8 Ball Pick: Minneapolis Masterminds
24/48 beers! – Well we got a whole case of delicious, nutritious, wholesome beer to split between 2 games this week!
The Shockers of Cincinnati go up against the BDC of So Cal in a "You Suck Me First Match"! That's where the first team to fall for that old line "You do me, then I'll do you", LOSES!!! (and in a big way, too)
Then there is the GOW.
The #2 Minneapolis Masterminds take on the #3 Dakar Dragons! This one is for the right to be #2.........well, being number two in a good way, that is.
So end the kids to Grandma's place, pick up the BBQ and open up some nice imported beer, because these two games are like a fine meal. They make you feel fat and stuffed and you don't even have to undo your belt.
Let’s do this shit!!
Good luck to all the teams in Zeta!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iH9ozkHsRtY
It's not what I usually do at night, but dancing the night away doesn't involve a jar of lube and a tube sock.
It's week 6!!
How the hell did we make it to week 6 already?!?!
I don't really care, but it is goin' by quick!
And if your team hasn't made a movement other than a bowel movement, you just might be out of it right when things are starting to heat the hell ups!!
So on to week 6!!!
The Free Agent Frenzy!!
Ok, so there is another place to go to market or work with others to get some quality free agents to help your team out.
It's called the Free Agent Frenzy!!
It's in it's second season and maybe you will find what you are looking for there.
Need a shut down corner? He could be there.
Need a pass rushing god? He could be there.
Need a power HB or pass blocking OT? They could be there.
All you have to do is send a PM to this dude and tell him SA sent ya' from the Sport's Page and he'll let you in.
http://goallineblitz.com/game/home.pl?user_id=201676
At least look at the avi. What great knockers she has!
Just trying to help the GLB community out any way I can.
SA's Player of the Week
And the POW goes to.....................
So Cal kicker Tom Gun! Yay!
Tom Gun kicked the game winning FG in OT and save the BDC from having to stop the Navigators, who dominated the 4th quarter with 24 points.
Had Mr Gun missed that FG, I'm not too sure if the BDC would have stopped Lincoln and maybe cost them the win.
So here's to you, Tom Gun..............................
http://i378.photobucket.com/albums/oo227/jason41470/Warsteiner_4a9ec543d47f2.jpg
SALUTE!!!
True story.
When old Ben Franklin was flying his kite in the rain, he was heard shouting up at the sky....................
..............................LET'S DO THIS SHIT!!!
You may or may not agree with them, but this is how I see them.
****ALPHA CONFERENCE POWER RANKINGS****
LW = Last Week ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched
#1 Chocolate Blaze (5-0) LW1 - GOW once again!
Next opponent: at #4 Indianapolis Gurupies (4-1)
#2 Warsaw Wrath (5-0) LW2 - Poor Grizzlies, they just got done getting their asses kicked and now they gets another.
Poor Grizzlies.
Next opponent: at #16 Graz Grizzlies (0-5)
#3 East St Louis Tire Fires (4-1) LW3 - It should be smooth sailing for you Tire Fires for the next 5 games until your big showdown with Warsaw.
Have fun.
Next opponent: at #11 Krungthep Garudas (2-3)
#4 Indianapolis Gurupies (4-1) LW4 - Big game awaits you in the GOW!
Next opponent: #1 Chocolate Blaze (5-0)
#5 Queen City Black Cats (3-2) LW7 - Nice way to turn things around!
You might be able to get two more wins to add to your 3 straight, then it's your big game against Warsaw.
Next opponent: at #7 NBA Jam (3-2)
#6 La Tourette Syndrome (3-2) LW8 - All I know is that if you guys want to win more often, you need to trade that lazy HB Johnson Chad.
The guy plays GLB fat, slow and stupid.
The only scoring he has done lately is on my ex and..........................wait a minute...............DAM YOU JOHNSON CHAD!!!.....................you slut.
Next opponent: at #10 Honolulu Hurricane Wife Carriers (2-3)
#7 NBA Jam (3-2) LW11 - Can you make it 2 wins in a row?
You need to stay consistent to hold on to that 7 spot or even move up.
So start "Heating up!!!"
Next opponent: #5 Queen City Black Cats (3-2)
#8 Providence Radicals (3-2) LW5 - Well that was a surprising loss, but it's your own dam fault.
Make a nice rebound win out of the White Rhino's, maybe that will cheer you guys up a bit.
Next opponent: at #13 Windhoek White Rhinos (1-4)
#9 Sparta Battle Chickens (3-2) LW6 - Don't take any chances this week. Go get the W over the Ghost Riders and get set for Warsaw after wards.
Next opponent: at #15 Ghost Riders In The Sky (1-4)
#10 Honolulu Hurricane Wife Carriers (2-3) LW13 - Great job getting the W overProvidence!
Can you make it 2 in a row?
Next opponent: #6 La Tourette Syndrome (3-2)
#11 Krungthep Garudas (2-3) LW9 - Well, you garudas better get ready for a very rocky road ahead.
ESL, Blaze and Gurupies in the next 4 games is a lot to handle.
So pick up the wins where tyou can, like H&D and any of the games after Indy, except for Warsaw.
There may still be enough shots at wins to grab that 8th spot.
Next opponent: #3 East St Louis Tire Fires (4-1)
#12 [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF] (2-3) LW10 - Right now the Wildfire are having troubles of their own, so it would be a great opportunity to get a win and even yourselves back up to .500.
Next opponent: at #14 October Wildfire (1-4)
#13 Windhoek White Rhinos (1-4) LW12 - Well you guys have to get off the losing track. That path usually leads straight to the Hot Chick Lounge.
Providence just lo0st to Honolulu, so there might be a chance for a win.
And La Tourette isn't completely out of the question, but after that are the Tire Fires and the Blaze.
You need a string of W's before this hole gets any deeper.
Next opponent: #8 Providence Radicals (3-2)
#14 October Wildfire (1-4) LW14 - Outstanding!
Superb!
Fan-fucking-tastic!
You guys really went all out and took the Tire Fires to the edge last week! I applaud your great effort, even if it came up a tad short.
But you guys put forth an extraordinary performance and I hope it continues.
The difference between ordinary and extraordinary, is that little extra.
Next opponent: #12 [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF] (2-3)
#15 Ghost Riders In The Sky (1-4) LW15 - Well this next game you will either win or you will lose, so let's not talk about that.
Let's talk about you. Especially your punter Diandra "Sweet Dee" Reynolds.
"It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" is hilarious!
Did you see the "Dayman Cometh" episode and how about Green Man? Oh, it is such funny shit.
What a great show. If you have never seen it, check it out on FX, you just might piss yourself.
Next opponent: #9 Sparta Battle Chickens (3-2)
#16 Graz Grizzlies (0-5) LW16 - Well Grizzlies, if you don't win this one (and you know it won't happen) I think you guys just might be the 1st Alpha team to go into the Hot Chick Lounge.
Next opponent: #2 Warsaw Wrath (5-0)
*****WEEK 6 ALPHA CONFERENCE PREDICTIONS*****
Here's my prediction record week by week.
Week 1: 7-1 Week 2: 6-2 Week 3: 6-2 Week 4: 7-1 Week 5: 5-3
Overall: 31-9
SA’s GOW: 5-0
Magic 8 Ball’s GOW: 3-2
#12 [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF] (2-3) at #14 October Wildfire (1-4) = October Wildfire
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#6 La Tourette Syndrome (3-2) at #10 Honolulu Hurricane Wife Carriers (2-3) = La Tourette Syndrome
Game Rating: 3/6 beers
#8 Providence Radicals (3-2) at #13 Windhoek White Rhinos (1-4) = Providence Radicals
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#9 Sparta Battle Chickens (3-2) at #15 Ghost Riders In The Sky (1-4) = Sparta Battle Chickens
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#5 Queen City Black Cats (3-2) at #7 NBA Jam (3-2) = Queen City Black Cats
Game Rating: 4/6 beers
#3 East St Louis Tire Fires (4-1) at #11 Krungthep Garudas (2-3) = East St Louis Tire Fires
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#2 Warsaw Wrath (5-0) at #16 Graz Grizzlies (0-5) = Warsaw Wrath
Game Rating: 1/6 beers
#1 Chocolate Blaze (5-0) at #4 Indianapolis Gurupies (4-1) = Chocolate Blaze
Game Rating: 6/6 beers
*Game Of The Week* (GOW)
#1 Chocolate Blaze (5-0) at #4 Indianapolis Gurupies (4-1) -
Chocolate and Indianapolis, these two kingdoms have been fighting each other since 1386 when they both had the same country nickname of "Passing Wind" and went to war over it.
I know, it is kinda' dumb to go to war over such a terrible nickname, but the Chocolate Blaze and the Indianapolis Gurupies both love "Passing Wind" so much that they made a big stink over it.
But the age old rivalry ends here dammit!!
No more fighting after this one!
No more killing after this one!
No more putting dog poop in a bag, lighting it on fire and ringing the other team's doorbell and running to hide in the bushes to watch the opponent come out and find said bag of poop on fire and stomp it out with their new pair of high heels that they like to wear in the privacy of their own home.
It's funny as shit.......BUT NO MORE!!!
So yo Bort! What say you quit thinking up ways to screw my player builds up and get to simmin' this mofo'!!
Magic 8 Ball says: http://av.vet.ksu.edu/flash/8ball
Question: Will the Blaze beat the Gurupies?
8 Ball's answer: My sources say no.
SA's Pick: Chocolate Blaze
Magic 8 Ball Pick: Indianapolis Gurupies
22/48 beers! – OK, so there isn't a lot going on this week, but there are 2 games that you should pound away some beers to.
The #5 Queen City Black Cats get ready to take on the #7 NBA Jam in a "Golden Shower Match"! I think you can guess what happens to the loser.
And the #1 Chocolate Blaze goes to Indiana, the Gurupie State, to take on the #4 Indianapolis Gurupies in the GOW!!
How's that for super happy fun GLB action this week?
Yep, it gives me a boner too.
Let’s do this shit!!
Good luck to all the teams in the Alpha!
____________________________________________________________________________
****ZETA CONFERENCE POWER RANKINGS****
LW = Last Week Ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched
#1 Valhalla (5-0) LW1 -
Ho-hum, ho-hum,
another win for Valhalla is so much fun.
Next opponent: #9 Porto Alegre Smugglers (2-3)
#2 Minneapolis Masterminds (4-1) LW2 - Another GOW? You truly are "Masterminds".
Next opponent: at #3 Dakar Dragons (4-1)
#3 Dakar Dragons (4-1) LW4 - Biggest test of the season waits you in the GOW this week!
Next opponent: #2 Minneapolis Masterminds (4-1)
#4 So Cal BDC (4-1) LW5 - Could be a tough battle here and you guys know that if you want to keep that top 4 rank you need to do what?..................win.
Next opponent: #7 Cincinnati Shockers (3-2)
#5 Moose Jaw Roughriders (4-1) LW6 - I know you guys are Roughriders and all, but when you get the win try to keep from doing all that extra rapin', pillagin' and/or plunderin' stuff or at least just do the rapin' part.
And no team would do any rapin', pillagin' and/or plunderin' without a Roughrider condom.
Roughrider is the only all organic condom and has been proven to be the #1 brand choice of those getting raped, pillaged and/or plundered.
So when the time calls for your team to rape, pillage and/or plunder, choose Roughrider.
Next opponent: at #10 Mayan Prophecy (2-3)
#6 Lincoln Navigators (3-2) LW3 - Well C-Town is in a bit of disarray right now, so maybe phone in the win this week. Just call the C-Town stadium officials and tell them you are thinking of showing up for the game and they should go ahead and surrender the W by phone.
Good luck.
Next opponent: at #13 C-Town Hoodlums (1-4)
#7 Cincinnati Shockers (3-2) LW10 - OK Cincy! 3-2 and now you've got somethin' to prove!
This game will decide whether you gots what it takes or you're just gettin' taken out!
Time to Shock the world..................or at least a small part of southern California.
Next opponent: at #4 So Cal BDC (4-1)
#8 Ministry of Dotball (2-3) LW7 - If your QB Elmer Fudd can stop hunting wabbits and start hunting spidah's, you guys may just end up with a W.
Next opponent: #12 Sofia Spiders (1-4)
#9 Porto Alegre Smugglers (2-3) LW8 - Alright team! I think we can turn this thing around! All we need is some wins and we are back in this thing and...................wha?.................you are playing Valhalla next?.............................never mind.
Next opponent: at #1 Valhalla (5-0)
#10 Mayan Prophecy (2-3) LW9 - OK, I really want to help you guys out. So I've been looking through these ancient writings where you get your prophecies from.
I've spent hours and hours learning the language and customs of the ancient and proud people of the Maya.
I spent minutes boning women from the Maya peninsula and have studied the philosophies of the ancient Maya people and their leaders, kings and shamans.
And I think I've unlocked the secret to winning the next game for you.........oh, hold on one sec...................yes, Pizza Guy? I'll take a super supreme Big Hoss sausage pizza and an order of Burning Ass hot wings and a small diet Pepsi, thanks.........sorry about that, but it's lunch time and I got to go pick up my pizza.
See you next week.
Next opponent: #5 Moose Jaw Roughriders (4-1)
#11 Bonn Dynamo (2-3) LW11 - College Town should mean a win and a week end party.
Don't you just love going back to school?
Next opponent: #14 College Town NWA Feeble Minds (1-4)
#12 Sofia Spiders (1-4) LW13 - Congrats Spiders! You finally got your name in the W column! The leg countdown has been stopped for now.
MoD and Prophecy aren't out of reach as far as W's are concerned, so go for 2.
Next opponent: at #8 Ministry of Dotball (2-3)
#13 C-Town Hoodlums (1-4) LW12 - Well you guys have a string of very tough games up next. Lincoln, Cincy, SoCal, MoD, Prophecy, Valhalla. It doesn't bode well for the home team.
But just keep the team motto in mind when you play these tough games: http://i45.tinypic.com/29n8hl4.jpg
Hopefully you can turn things around and make a run for the 8 spot or end up in the HCL and hit the G-Spot.
Next opponent: #6 Lincoln Navigators (3-2
#14 College Town NWA Feeble Minds (1-4) LW14 - Yay! Way to go feeble Mind'ers! You got win #1 on the season and proved you aren't the shit that sinks to the bottom of the toilet. (see two teams below)
Now let's give it the old college try and go for 2
Next opponent: at #11 Bonn Dynamo (2-3)
#15 Korb Destroyers (0-5) LW15 - OK, Korbites, you need to win this one to prove that you are NOT quite ready for the Hot Chick Lounge.
If there is any life left in you Destroyers, now is the time to pull the rabbit out of the pants.
At least that's what my Uncle Morty used to do in his magic show. Poor Uncle Morty can't do his tricks for another 3-5 years with good behavior.
Next opponent: #16 Machu Picchu Hidden Dragons (0-5)
#16 Machu Picchu Hidden Dragons (0-5) LW16 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2001/10brandy/Brandy-21.jpg
Next opponent: at #15 Korb Destroyers (0-5)
*****WEEK 6 ZETA CONFERENCE PREDICTIONS*****
Here's my prediction record week by week.
Week 1: 4-4 Week 2: 4-4 Week 3: 6-2 Week 4: 6-2 Week 5: 5-3
Overall: 25-15
SA’s GOW: 4-1
Magic 8 Ball’s GOW: 3-2
#2 Minneapolis Masterminds (4-1) at #3 Dakar Dragons (4-1) = Minneapolis Masterminds
Game Rating: 6/6 beers
#7 Cincinnati Shockers (3-2) at #4 So Cal BDC (4-1) = So Cal BDC
Game Rating: 5/6 beers
#9 Porto Alegre Smugglers (2-3) at #1 Valhalla (5-0) = Valhalla
Game Rating: 3/6 beers
#5 Moose Jaw Roughriders (4-1) at #10 Mayan Prophecy (2-3) = Moose Jaw Roughriders
Game Rating: 3/6 beers
#12 Sofia Spiders (1-4) at #8 Ministry of Dotball (2-3) = Ministry of Dotball
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#6 Lincoln Navigators (3-2) at #13 C-Town Hoodlums (1-4) = Lincoln Navigators
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#14 College Town NWA Feeble Minds (1-4) at #11 Bonn Dynamo (2-3) = Bonn Dynamo
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#16 Machu Picchu Hidden Dragons (0-5) at #15 Korb Destroyers (0-5) = Korb Destroyers
Game Rating: 1/6 beers
*Game Of The Week* (GOW)
#2 Minneapolis Masterminds (4-1) at #3 Dakar Dragons (4-1) -
#2 vs #3!
Masterminds take on the Dragons in a top 4 war!!
Send it to Thunder Dome!!
Two teams enter!
One team leaves!
If the Dragons win, it proves they may be legit!
If they lose, they suck!
If the Masterminds win, it's just another win!
If the Masterminds lose, they will be Master-baters!
Flying around castles, breathing fire and terrorizing damsels in distress?
YES!!
Mastering your own mind, creating a GLB team and calling it the Masterminds?
DONE!!!
Taking long walks on short piers and pushing your opponent in the water?
Lame, but..................DO IT!!!!
Yo Bort! It's time to get to simmin' and see which team gets all wet!
Magic 8 Ball says: http://av.vet.ksu.edu/flash/8ball
Question: Will the Masterminds beat the Dragons?
8 Ball's answer: As I see it, yes.
SA's Pick: Minneapolis Masterminds
Magic 8 Ball Pick: Minneapolis Masterminds
24/48 beers! – Well we got a whole case of delicious, nutritious, wholesome beer to split between 2 games this week!
The Shockers of Cincinnati go up against the BDC of So Cal in a "You Suck Me First Match"! That's where the first team to fall for that old line "You do me, then I'll do you", LOSES!!! (and in a big way, too)
Then there is the GOW.
The #2 Minneapolis Masterminds take on the #3 Dakar Dragons! This one is for the right to be #2.........well, being number two in a good way, that is.
So end the kids to Grandma's place, pick up the BBQ and open up some nice imported beer, because these two games are like a fine meal. They make you feel fat and stuffed and you don't even have to undo your belt.
Let’s do this shit!!
Good luck to all the teams in Zeta!
Edited by Smiling Assasain on Apr 17, 2010 09:36:56
Edited by Smiling Assasain on Apr 17, 2010 09:34:01
Edited by Smiling Assasain on Apr 17, 2010 09:08:16
