ESPN Africa reporter Chris Bortensen caught up with Africa League legend Freddie Mitchell to address some rumors that have been swirling around lately.
Bortensen: "It's been a while since I talked to you. How did you like the World League?"
Freddie: "Man, my team didn't know how to use me. These hands were made for more than blocking, you know? It was fun to go up against great competition, but if I had some competent coaches I'd be carrying a MVP trophy right now."
Bortensen: "So Freddie, is it true that you'll be returning to APL in Season 12?"
Freddie: "Yes, it is. I mean, I'm a realist, and my career is winding down, so I gotta get ready for my next gig in the media, and I gotta watch over my brand down here. I'm still a superstar in Africa and my Freddie's Foxxxes chain is providing people with phallic pleasures even during the recession. Plus, might as well pick up a MVP award while I'm at it."
Bortensen: "You're guaranteeing that you'll win MVP?"
Freddie: "Damn right, and when I win, I'm melting that trophy down into a chain and wearing that shit around my neck. People should be able to recognize greatness 24/7."
Bortensen: "So what team will you be joining?"
Freddie: "That's confidential."
Bortensen: "OK, we're running short on time here, so do you have anything else to say?"
Freddie: "Of course. I've pulled some strings with African governments and the entire continent will be observing 'Freddie Mitchell Day' this Saturday. It's great for the fans, because all my merchandise - jerseys, sex tapes, private sessions at Freddie's Foxxxes, rap albums - is 84% off. And we'll be having celebrations in every corner of the continent. That will also be the day on which I'll sign with a team for next season, so stay tuned."
Bortensen: "Weird, I've been given Saturday off..."
Freddie: "Yeah, I've bought all 24 hours of Friday programming on ESPN Africa. I understand you'd be showing the WNBA otherwise, so you're welcome in advance."
Bortensen: "It's been a while since I talked to you. How did you like the World League?"
Freddie: "Man, my team didn't know how to use me. These hands were made for more than blocking, you know? It was fun to go up against great competition, but if I had some competent coaches I'd be carrying a MVP trophy right now."
Bortensen: "So Freddie, is it true that you'll be returning to APL in Season 12?"
Freddie: "Yes, it is. I mean, I'm a realist, and my career is winding down, so I gotta get ready for my next gig in the media, and I gotta watch over my brand down here. I'm still a superstar in Africa and my Freddie's Foxxxes chain is providing people with phallic pleasures even during the recession. Plus, might as well pick up a MVP award while I'm at it."
Bortensen: "You're guaranteeing that you'll win MVP?"
Freddie: "Damn right, and when I win, I'm melting that trophy down into a chain and wearing that shit around my neck. People should be able to recognize greatness 24/7."
Bortensen: "So what team will you be joining?"
Freddie: "That's confidential."
Bortensen: "OK, we're running short on time here, so do you have anything else to say?"
Freddie: "Of course. I've pulled some strings with African governments and the entire continent will be observing 'Freddie Mitchell Day' this Saturday. It's great for the fans, because all my merchandise - jerseys, sex tapes, private sessions at Freddie's Foxxxes, rap albums - is 84% off. And we'll be having celebrations in every corner of the continent. That will also be the day on which I'll sign with a team for next season, so stay tuned."
Bortensen: "Weird, I've been given Saturday off..."
Freddie: "Yeah, I've bought all 24 hours of Friday programming on ESPN Africa. I understand you'd be showing the WNBA otherwise, so you're welcome in advance."
Edited by FredEx on Sep 23, 2009 14:44:12
Edited by FredEx on Sep 23, 2009 14:43:46
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