Ok, so since we lost our fun-loving, shit-talking poster, Mob-6 to promotion ("Sell Out!"), I'll take a stab at posting this season on behalf of the Naga conference. And as an added bonus, I get to take some extra shots at Ack Attack and Dodgerdan, rekindling our love of yesteryear.
So, here we go... How *I* see things shaking down, considering half of these motherfucking teams are new and I have little to no knowledge about them, nevermind the rest of the conference....
"Chuck Norris' ":
1 - Phnom Penh Kung Fu Panda - A great team all around that should win most of it's games this upcoming season. Considering 3 of last seasons 5 losses came to teams that are no longer around, only a few stand in the way of this potential juggernaut. However, Kung Fu did struggle vs. some surefire 'Shoulda Wons' last season, so nothing is set in stone.
2 - Kathmandu Mountaineers - Didn't really think they should climb to number two, (perhaps 3 or 4), however there wasn't really anyone left to counter them. Last season's 12-4 record set the mark, and though there's still some recruiting to attend to, it looks as if Kathmandu will be yodeling from the top of the conference yet again...just in time to choke in the playoffs.
3 - Hellas Hokies - Well, HELL! Originally had them as the #1, before seeing the potential shambles they could be in shortly, given their roster and expiring contracts. Should they be able to secure that area, they'll surely be a force in this conference and could even finish with the overall seed. If not, well - at least their basement will have a roaring fire to keep things cozy and warm. Your bet is as good as mine - to hell with it.
4 - American Patriots - A tough call for the clean-up spot, but the Patriots DO have a solid talent base and could definitely contend for a home playoff game or two. Don't look for these nationalistic bastards to finish as the overall top seed, but 2nd to 4th overall is more than attainable. But watch out, already sitting at almost a million in the red, they may be in need of their own federal bailout.
"Mr. Miyagi's":
5 - Bangkok Black Knights - A super underrated team last year, only getting better. They could contend for a home playoff game, if things go their way down the stretch. They are my dark horse this season (no pun intended; see logo), so be warned. Checkmate or Go Fish?
6 - Burma Bulldogs - Fresh off of a demotion, and then going CPU, it's hard to say what to expect here. Still, they seem to have put together a fairly decent team, capable of making the playoffs (IMO). Their potential is good, but many questions still remain regarding this newcomer and how it 'lines up' vs. the existing SEA AA contingent. Go fetch, Rover.
7 - Shaolin Zen Masters - A decent defensive team, with the likes of fumble master (LB) "Harold and Kumar", look for Shaolin to take a leap forward into the playoffs this season - something they just barely missed last year. Perhaps still just the student, Shaolin is on the road to becoming their own master.
8 - Ack Attack - I'm going to do it. I'm going to say the Attack are at least partially back and somehow sneak into the 8th an final playoff spot, with a record of around 8-8 or 7-9. They are the best of the promoted teams to arrive in my view and have a nice slow build team coming along. A second tour of duty by the FB (Buster) & CB (Speedy ), brings back memories. But please, don't bring back Herb Sanders!
"Jean-Claude Van Damme's":
9 - Mongolian Horde - Another great team from A7 that has finally turned the corner and worked it's way up to AA. Was a really tough call between them and the Ack, and frankly, I gave the edge to the team that won last season's head to head battle. I expect nothing short of a playoff push from Team Mongo, right into the last week of the season.
10 - Changu Dragons - Another good team coming up from below, to replace some of the weaker teams part of the league last season. As a result, we should see better, more competitive games in the conference. However, don't expect these Dragons to be on the winning end of those games as often as they're on the losing end. They can fly, but don't expect them to breathe fire quite yet.
11 - Pekin Dragons - The second of the dragon teams coming off of a promotion. Very similar in levels to Changu, and very successful last season as well. Still, not quite as defensively strong as the CD's, so they'll need to be better gameplanners. Still a season away from a playoff birth, I'd say.
12 - Taipei Giant Pandas - An up and coming team, these furry bamboo crunchers aren't the cuddly teddy bears you might take them for. Look for a record of 6-10 or 7-9, contending for a playoff spot up until the bitter end, falling just short by about two wins, but improving slightly on last season's record.
"Steven Segal's":
13 - Phnom Penh Warriors - It hurts me to rank these guys this far down, as despite being out-leveled for the most part, they play well beyond their experience. Still, some of last seasons mediocre teams had their way with the Warriors, and looks like they may yet again.
14 - Akita Akuma's - First off, what's with the apostrophe in the wrong spot! Bugged me in Season 6, still bugs me now. Looking at Akita, their levels seem decent, but that never was the problem. They outleveled competition in the past and still finished out of the playoffs. Until they show they belong here, this is as high as I can rank them.
15 - Gobi Desert Wolves - A team that might as well keep Mob's edible description from last season, the "Dessert Wolves" will pose no serious threat to anyone in the conference, sans Wuhan. I spy with my little eye, a 1-15 season, topped with a sprinkle of despair, a swirl of obliteration and a scoop of vanilla ice cream.
16 - Wuhan Wolverines - These clawless beasts are the freak show of SEA "AA". This year's TC Williams, it's no contest. Ring the bell, throw in the towel, they are the worst of the worst, having elected to go slow-build. And for some reason, they were not 'relocated'. Anything besides an 0-16 season would be an absolute shocker. Word to yo momma.
So, here we go... How *I* see things shaking down, considering half of these motherfucking teams are new and I have little to no knowledge about them, nevermind the rest of the conference....
"Chuck Norris' ":
1 - Phnom Penh Kung Fu Panda - A great team all around that should win most of it's games this upcoming season. Considering 3 of last seasons 5 losses came to teams that are no longer around, only a few stand in the way of this potential juggernaut. However, Kung Fu did struggle vs. some surefire 'Shoulda Wons' last season, so nothing is set in stone.
2 - Kathmandu Mountaineers - Didn't really think they should climb to number two, (perhaps 3 or 4), however there wasn't really anyone left to counter them. Last season's 12-4 record set the mark, and though there's still some recruiting to attend to, it looks as if Kathmandu will be yodeling from the top of the conference yet again...just in time to choke in the playoffs.
3 - Hellas Hokies - Well, HELL! Originally had them as the #1, before seeing the potential shambles they could be in shortly, given their roster and expiring contracts. Should they be able to secure that area, they'll surely be a force in this conference and could even finish with the overall seed. If not, well - at least their basement will have a roaring fire to keep things cozy and warm. Your bet is as good as mine - to hell with it.
4 - American Patriots - A tough call for the clean-up spot, but the Patriots DO have a solid talent base and could definitely contend for a home playoff game or two. Don't look for these nationalistic bastards to finish as the overall top seed, but 2nd to 4th overall is more than attainable. But watch out, already sitting at almost a million in the red, they may be in need of their own federal bailout.
"Mr. Miyagi's":
5 - Bangkok Black Knights - A super underrated team last year, only getting better. They could contend for a home playoff game, if things go their way down the stretch. They are my dark horse this season (no pun intended; see logo), so be warned. Checkmate or Go Fish?
6 - Burma Bulldogs - Fresh off of a demotion, and then going CPU, it's hard to say what to expect here. Still, they seem to have put together a fairly decent team, capable of making the playoffs (IMO). Their potential is good, but many questions still remain regarding this newcomer and how it 'lines up' vs. the existing SEA AA contingent. Go fetch, Rover.
7 - Shaolin Zen Masters - A decent defensive team, with the likes of fumble master (LB) "Harold and Kumar", look for Shaolin to take a leap forward into the playoffs this season - something they just barely missed last year. Perhaps still just the student, Shaolin is on the road to becoming their own master.
8 - Ack Attack - I'm going to do it. I'm going to say the Attack are at least partially back and somehow sneak into the 8th an final playoff spot, with a record of around 8-8 or 7-9. They are the best of the promoted teams to arrive in my view and have a nice slow build team coming along. A second tour of duty by the FB (Buster) & CB (Speedy ), brings back memories. But please, don't bring back Herb Sanders!
"Jean-Claude Van Damme's":
9 - Mongolian Horde - Another great team from A7 that has finally turned the corner and worked it's way up to AA. Was a really tough call between them and the Ack, and frankly, I gave the edge to the team that won last season's head to head battle. I expect nothing short of a playoff push from Team Mongo, right into the last week of the season.
10 - Changu Dragons - Another good team coming up from below, to replace some of the weaker teams part of the league last season. As a result, we should see better, more competitive games in the conference. However, don't expect these Dragons to be on the winning end of those games as often as they're on the losing end. They can fly, but don't expect them to breathe fire quite yet.
11 - Pekin Dragons - The second of the dragon teams coming off of a promotion. Very similar in levels to Changu, and very successful last season as well. Still, not quite as defensively strong as the CD's, so they'll need to be better gameplanners. Still a season away from a playoff birth, I'd say.
12 - Taipei Giant Pandas - An up and coming team, these furry bamboo crunchers aren't the cuddly teddy bears you might take them for. Look for a record of 6-10 or 7-9, contending for a playoff spot up until the bitter end, falling just short by about two wins, but improving slightly on last season's record.
"Steven Segal's":
13 - Phnom Penh Warriors - It hurts me to rank these guys this far down, as despite being out-leveled for the most part, they play well beyond their experience. Still, some of last seasons mediocre teams had their way with the Warriors, and looks like they may yet again.
14 - Akita Akuma's - First off, what's with the apostrophe in the wrong spot! Bugged me in Season 6, still bugs me now. Looking at Akita, their levels seem decent, but that never was the problem. They outleveled competition in the past and still finished out of the playoffs. Until they show they belong here, this is as high as I can rank them.
15 - Gobi Desert Wolves - A team that might as well keep Mob's edible description from last season, the "Dessert Wolves" will pose no serious threat to anyone in the conference, sans Wuhan. I spy with my little eye, a 1-15 season, topped with a sprinkle of despair, a swirl of obliteration and a scoop of vanilla ice cream.
16 - Wuhan Wolverines - These clawless beasts are the freak show of SEA "AA". This year's TC Williams, it's no contest. Ring the bell, throw in the towel, they are the worst of the worst, having elected to go slow-build. And for some reason, they were not 'relocated'. Anything besides an 0-16 season would be an absolute shocker. Word to yo momma.
Last edited Apr 16, 2009 22:23:24
