The South African Ratels went from missing the playoffs to one game from the Lion Conference Championship in one year. Last year, they looked like the clumsy, hot girl with bad acne who you looked at and wondered what went wrong. Now they are the belle of the ball and if they can pull off one more upset of the African Hotheads, will be facing almost sure promotion to AAA.
It seems a lot of these guys are Marines so you know they are competitive. But what you may not know is the word Marine comes from the Latin word that roughly translated, ‘wish we were Air Force.’ By coupling the competitive nature with the inferiority complex you have one angry rodent on game days.
I was able to talk to USMC5813, owner of the Ratels, after they beat the Durban Deserthawks to get his thoughts on the game and his view on tomorrow’s playoff versus the African Fever. Here is copy of the transcript.
Radja - Great win! You guys now have won 10 in a row. That must feel really nice.
USMC - We hate Air Force. Hate them! Hate them! Hate them! They may fly us places and provide air cover for us and drop bombs and missiles on the enemy, but when you need someone to run up a beach head facing almost certain death, who do they send? Us, the most important people in the Armed Forces.
Radja - OK cool. What that has to do with the 10 game win streak....I don’t know, but good job. Ummmm.Where did you get your Goal Line Blitz name?
USMC - Well, it’s a combo of my IQ and ACT score. The Marines said I am gifted. I can make general someday.
Radja - Don’t you get a 10 for just spelling your name righ.... never mind. Uuuum, so how did beating the Hawks feel?
USMC - We hate the Hawks like the Air Force.
Radja - That hate must run pretty...(Interupted)
USMC - That’s because they both fly you know.
Radja - I got the analogy... Thanks Forrest. So.. (Interupted)
USMC - What are you talking about? We’re in the desert. Like the Hawks.
Radja - Oh. Yeah, I can see that. I am not gifted. So you got the African Fever next. They are a very tough team. Do you think you can take them?
USMC - Our CO had us watch a film on that and we got shots afterward. We are totally immune.
Radja - But the African Fever is...
USMC - It’s called Malaria. It is from mosquitoes. They fly too. We hate them.
Radja - That’s awesome. I am sure you guys will do well. So since you are immunized from the Fever, when you get past them you will likely face Tanzania or Quicama. They are either Park Rangers or Lumberjacks and they don’t fly, so what do you have planned for them?
USMC - We are Marines and we are well trained. Lumberjacks aren’t Marines. Park Rangers are too timid to be Marines. Protecting the world from what? Misplaced soda pop cans?!?!!? Please....We are well trained machines. We run more in one week than all the other armed forces do all year. So we are going to run on them. Opie Taylor is going to run. Then we are going to run and then throw them off with a draw play.
Radja - They will never see that coming. Well good luck. I think you guys can do it. Congrats on a great season.
I have great respect for these rodents. When the playoffs began nobody picked them to do anything. Now they can do some serious damage and earn some serious respect. With at least 4 teams dropping from AAA Lion next year all the way down to A, I strongly believe in the possibility we will be losing at least three of the remaining 4 playoff teams to promotion.
Great job, South Africa. I am rooting for you to win it all.
It seems a lot of these guys are Marines so you know they are competitive. But what you may not know is the word Marine comes from the Latin word that roughly translated, ‘wish we were Air Force.’ By coupling the competitive nature with the inferiority complex you have one angry rodent on game days.
I was able to talk to USMC5813, owner of the Ratels, after they beat the Durban Deserthawks to get his thoughts on the game and his view on tomorrow’s playoff versus the African Fever. Here is copy of the transcript.
Radja - Great win! You guys now have won 10 in a row. That must feel really nice.
USMC - We hate Air Force. Hate them! Hate them! Hate them! They may fly us places and provide air cover for us and drop bombs and missiles on the enemy, but when you need someone to run up a beach head facing almost certain death, who do they send? Us, the most important people in the Armed Forces.
Radja - OK cool. What that has to do with the 10 game win streak....I don’t know, but good job. Ummmm.Where did you get your Goal Line Blitz name?
USMC - Well, it’s a combo of my IQ and ACT score. The Marines said I am gifted. I can make general someday.
Radja - Don’t you get a 10 for just spelling your name righ.... never mind. Uuuum, so how did beating the Hawks feel?
USMC - We hate the Hawks like the Air Force.
Radja - That hate must run pretty...(Interupted)
USMC - That’s because they both fly you know.
Radja - I got the analogy... Thanks Forrest. So.. (Interupted)
USMC - What are you talking about? We’re in the desert. Like the Hawks.
Radja - Oh. Yeah, I can see that. I am not gifted. So you got the African Fever next. They are a very tough team. Do you think you can take them?
USMC - Our CO had us watch a film on that and we got shots afterward. We are totally immune.
Radja - But the African Fever is...
USMC - It’s called Malaria. It is from mosquitoes. They fly too. We hate them.
Radja - That’s awesome. I am sure you guys will do well. So since you are immunized from the Fever, when you get past them you will likely face Tanzania or Quicama. They are either Park Rangers or Lumberjacks and they don’t fly, so what do you have planned for them?
USMC - We are Marines and we are well trained. Lumberjacks aren’t Marines. Park Rangers are too timid to be Marines. Protecting the world from what? Misplaced soda pop cans?!?!!? Please....We are well trained machines. We run more in one week than all the other armed forces do all year. So we are going to run on them. Opie Taylor is going to run. Then we are going to run and then throw them off with a draw play.
Radja - They will never see that coming. Well good luck. I think you guys can do it. Congrats on a great season.
I have great respect for these rodents. When the playoffs began nobody picked them to do anything. Now they can do some serious damage and earn some serious respect. With at least 4 teams dropping from AAA Lion next year all the way down to A, I strongly believe in the possibility we will be losing at least three of the remaining 4 playoff teams to promotion.
Great job, South Africa. I am rooting for you to win it all.






























