Windy City Whippin'
Bel Air Beardogs 37
Chicago Clams 0
When you think top end performance automobile, how many horsepower would you think? 500? In this case, the Beardog high performance machine is run by only 2 horsepower: Beard OG and Furious Monotony. Each pulled their weight on the way to a 335 yard rushing day for the Beardogs, adding four touchdowns to the yard total.
Coupled with another flawless Mikey Black performance, the Beardog machine manufactured another easy W. It didn't come easy though... actually, yeah it did. Chicago's resistance came in the form of 40.5 total yards (only half a yard rushing) and they were only able to grab one first down the entire game.
Defensively, Sudden Terror took advantage of a coaching decision that found he and Tyrone Knizzle switching Defensive End positions. Terror had a huge game with 8 tackles, a sack, hurry, and two tackles for loss. Obviously the decision had its merits, as can be seen in the results!
Chicago's defense, exhaust though they were, had some stars shine in the dim light of this game. Mack Lovin (LB) grabbed 12 tackles and Bull Shnott had 11 with one for a loss. High tackle totals, but how can you not grab a ton of tackles when you are on the field the entire game?
The hometown Chicago fans came out in full force to see this contest, but most left at halftime. Partly due to the fact that their Clams were down 17-0 at the half, but more so because they could not generate any type of offense. The Beardog D smothered any attempts to gain positive yards, making for an agonizingly long day for Clam players and fans alike.
AROUND THE LEAGUE
This weeks games are brought to you by the number 3! Why 3, you may be asking yourself? Two contests (Ambridge/Grand Haven and Las Vegas/Great Plains) which viewers believed would be close were in fact... not. Both ended with a lot of 3s in the score (33-3, 23-3) in favor of the home team. Which is more impressive? Great Plains. Their complete dominance of a playoff contender should give the conference cause for concern.
Scottsdale 16
Waco 26
Scottsdale fought hard all game, giving the hometown fans something to sweat about when Stone Dragoon rushed up the middle for a two yard score with 4:26 left in the 3rd, Sun Devils down by only 7. Touchdown tied the score right? Wrong. Sabia Kicker missed the extra point but still, moral victory right? Wrong. Waco charged right down the field and made 4 huge plays in a row to answer back, widening the lead to 23-16. Scottsdale went three and out on their next possession and watched as Waco devoured the first 6 minutes of the 4th quarter with a drive ending on the Scottsdale 39.5 yard line. The ensuing punt by Raymund Guy demoralized the Sun Devils, leaving them pinned coffin corner style on their own 2.5 yard line. To their credit, they managed to the ball rolling at least in the form of one first down, but failed to do much after that. Waco added another FG late in the 4th to seal the deal, but the game was much closer than the final score may indicate (and extremely entertaining). Wolfgang Puck's 116 rushing yards and a score were huge for Waco, mainly because they were efficient yards (only 19 carries). Waco kicker Filipovic was perfect again when his points were sorely needed.
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Portland 23
Two quarterbacks and three wide receivers air mailed their Portland squad to an easy win in this one. Johnny Danger (158/TD) and Mike Vick(135/TD), the quarterbacks, found receivers Dick N. Balzonia (6/95/TD), Lucas Expo (5/88), and Paulie Cicero (9/76/TD) all night. Sucksat Soccer added 3 field goals to equal the score as you see it. I would give up talking about Awooga if he didn't continue to play well in the face of such overwhelming odds. In this one he got 18 carries for 81.5 yards (4.5 yard rushing average when the team couldn't do jack on offense) and 14 broken tackles. Team Strategy : 100% run, 100% RB
Spicewood 16
Dallas 10
The Longhorns cooked up this W on the backs of RJ Stew and Karl Roberts, who connected 6 times for 83 yards and a touchdown. In all, Stew was able to accumulate 227 yards to go along with that scoring play to Roberts. Maija Vilkkumaa also received 7 darts for 69 yards from Stew. While the rest of the Dallas secondary was busy not doing their job, the same can't be said for Complete Lockdown whose 11 tackles, interception, and dual pass deflections led the Dallas defense in their efforts to stop the bombardment. It didn't work... but at least they tried.
Oakland 15
New Brunswick 10
At halftime, the outcome of this game was very much in question. New Brunswick led 10-9 after Seth Logan missed a PAT right before the half. While Oakland was busy getting fired up at halftime, New Brunswick well... wasn't. Coming out for the 2nd half, the n00bs weren't able to extend a drive until 3 minutes into the 4th quarter. They barely missed feasible field goal (even though Allison had made a 49 yard attempt earlier) range and saw a kick from their David Allison fall short of the 48.5 yard mark. Hellen Keller and the Oakland offense answered quickly, firing away on their way to a 42 yard field goal of their own. With just under 2 minutes left in the game at that point, New Brunswick stalled again and made what could have been a hugely dramatic ending not so dramatic. All of us can sit here and say that the game was much closer than a lot of people believed, and Greg Martin's n00bs get a lot of credit for that. Credit doesn't really matter in the grand scheme, but hey its what I have to offer.
Ambridge 3
Grand Haven 33
Ambridge scored first, but did not score often. The 3-0 lead quickly disintegrated and spiraled into pure chaos as Grand Haven pounded out 33 unanswered points. The total yard differential is probably the easiest way to indicate how ridiculously one-sided this game turned out to be. Grand Haven : 425, Ambridge : 129.5. Grand Haven used 7 running backs and 9 receivers on their way to colossal offensive numbers. No one really "shined" in their commities but they all played well and fresh legs were constantly on the field. Good win for Grand Haven but lets not get ahead of ourselves... it is Ambridge after all.
Las Vegas 3
Great Plains 23
Who saw this coming? Not the result, Great Plains is a great squad, but a blowout of this magnitude against such a strong Vegas squad? It was obvious that the roster changes and lack of chemistry affected the Stunners on this night, where the lack of changes and the ability to form a solid team unit aided Great Plains. Tweeder's EZD had 10 catches for 97 to go along with Lincoln's 5 for 54 and a TD. Zip Yourpantsup chimed in with 2 picks on the defensive side. For Las Vegas, the best performance has to go to Guiherme TheWall with 8 tackles, a sack, 2 pass deflections, and 5 tackles for loss. The game wasn't really close, and Las Vegas needs to discover if they can come together as a team before playoff time or they may be looking at an early exit, if they make the race at all.
Miami 10
Hartford 3
For awhile, Miami was staring at a pretty dismal season. They'd gone 1 and 6 with their only win coming against a pathetic Clams team with tough games against Oakland, New Brunswick, and Las Vegas upcoming. Best way to get back on track? A HUGE win over Hartford (who played Oakland close and beat playoff contender Dallas). The game was close but Hartford just couldn't find an answer for the sole Miami touchdown: a rocket fired from the Korean Cannon to Corey Mendgik for a 15 yard gain. Miami may not win any of the next three games, but at least they did what they needed to do to get morale going in the right direction.
CLOSING STATEMENTS
They say behind every great quarterback is a great offensive line. Don't get me wrong, that statement is definitly true, but a pattern is emerging in 7 West. Behind all our great quarterbacks, there are superb tight ends. Spicewood's RJ Stew? Maija Vilkkumaa. Waco's Hugh Laurie? Theboy Marlowe. Great Plains Hayden Fry? Abra-CRUSH Lincoln. Even Oakland's combo of Cody Wilson and Sara Grimp, which hasn't put up the same numbers as these other pairs, has the potential to be a truly dangerous duo. I wanted to take this time to give the tight ends some noise, because we've got a lot of them making huge plays in the vertical game for their ball clubs. Keep on doin what your doin, as long as it isn't against the Beardogs! WOOF!
Bel Air Beardogs 37
Chicago Clams 0
When you think top end performance automobile, how many horsepower would you think? 500? In this case, the Beardog high performance machine is run by only 2 horsepower: Beard OG and Furious Monotony. Each pulled their weight on the way to a 335 yard rushing day for the Beardogs, adding four touchdowns to the yard total.
Coupled with another flawless Mikey Black performance, the Beardog machine manufactured another easy W. It didn't come easy though... actually, yeah it did. Chicago's resistance came in the form of 40.5 total yards (only half a yard rushing) and they were only able to grab one first down the entire game.
Defensively, Sudden Terror took advantage of a coaching decision that found he and Tyrone Knizzle switching Defensive End positions. Terror had a huge game with 8 tackles, a sack, hurry, and two tackles for loss. Obviously the decision had its merits, as can be seen in the results!
Chicago's defense, exhaust though they were, had some stars shine in the dim light of this game. Mack Lovin (LB) grabbed 12 tackles and Bull Shnott had 11 with one for a loss. High tackle totals, but how can you not grab a ton of tackles when you are on the field the entire game?
The hometown Chicago fans came out in full force to see this contest, but most left at halftime. Partly due to the fact that their Clams were down 17-0 at the half, but more so because they could not generate any type of offense. The Beardog D smothered any attempts to gain positive yards, making for an agonizingly long day for Clam players and fans alike.
AROUND THE LEAGUE
This weeks games are brought to you by the number 3! Why 3, you may be asking yourself? Two contests (Ambridge/Grand Haven and Las Vegas/Great Plains) which viewers believed would be close were in fact... not. Both ended with a lot of 3s in the score (33-3, 23-3) in favor of the home team. Which is more impressive? Great Plains. Their complete dominance of a playoff contender should give the conference cause for concern.
Scottsdale 16
Waco 26
Scottsdale fought hard all game, giving the hometown fans something to sweat about when Stone Dragoon rushed up the middle for a two yard score with 4:26 left in the 3rd, Sun Devils down by only 7. Touchdown tied the score right? Wrong. Sabia Kicker missed the extra point but still, moral victory right? Wrong. Waco charged right down the field and made 4 huge plays in a row to answer back, widening the lead to 23-16. Scottsdale went three and out on their next possession and watched as Waco devoured the first 6 minutes of the 4th quarter with a drive ending on the Scottsdale 39.5 yard line. The ensuing punt by Raymund Guy demoralized the Sun Devils, leaving them pinned coffin corner style on their own 2.5 yard line. To their credit, they managed to the ball rolling at least in the form of one first down, but failed to do much after that. Waco added another FG late in the 4th to seal the deal, but the game was much closer than the final score may indicate (and extremely entertaining). Wolfgang Puck's 116 rushing yards and a score were huge for Waco, mainly because they were efficient yards (only 19 carries). Waco kicker Filipovic was perfect again when his points were sorely needed.
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Portland 23
Two quarterbacks and three wide receivers air mailed their Portland squad to an easy win in this one. Johnny Danger (158/TD) and Mike Vick(135/TD), the quarterbacks, found receivers Dick N. Balzonia (6/95/TD), Lucas Expo (5/88), and Paulie Cicero (9/76/TD) all night. Sucksat Soccer added 3 field goals to equal the score as you see it. I would give up talking about Awooga if he didn't continue to play well in the face of such overwhelming odds. In this one he got 18 carries for 81.5 yards (4.5 yard rushing average when the team couldn't do jack on offense) and 14 broken tackles. Team Strategy : 100% run, 100% RB
Spicewood 16
Dallas 10
The Longhorns cooked up this W on the backs of RJ Stew and Karl Roberts, who connected 6 times for 83 yards and a touchdown. In all, Stew was able to accumulate 227 yards to go along with that scoring play to Roberts. Maija Vilkkumaa also received 7 darts for 69 yards from Stew. While the rest of the Dallas secondary was busy not doing their job, the same can't be said for Complete Lockdown whose 11 tackles, interception, and dual pass deflections led the Dallas defense in their efforts to stop the bombardment. It didn't work... but at least they tried.
Oakland 15
New Brunswick 10
At halftime, the outcome of this game was very much in question. New Brunswick led 10-9 after Seth Logan missed a PAT right before the half. While Oakland was busy getting fired up at halftime, New Brunswick well... wasn't. Coming out for the 2nd half, the n00bs weren't able to extend a drive until 3 minutes into the 4th quarter. They barely missed feasible field goal (even though Allison had made a 49 yard attempt earlier) range and saw a kick from their David Allison fall short of the 48.5 yard mark. Hellen Keller and the Oakland offense answered quickly, firing away on their way to a 42 yard field goal of their own. With just under 2 minutes left in the game at that point, New Brunswick stalled again and made what could have been a hugely dramatic ending not so dramatic. All of us can sit here and say that the game was much closer than a lot of people believed, and Greg Martin's n00bs get a lot of credit for that. Credit doesn't really matter in the grand scheme, but hey its what I have to offer.
Ambridge 3
Grand Haven 33
Ambridge scored first, but did not score often. The 3-0 lead quickly disintegrated and spiraled into pure chaos as Grand Haven pounded out 33 unanswered points. The total yard differential is probably the easiest way to indicate how ridiculously one-sided this game turned out to be. Grand Haven : 425, Ambridge : 129.5. Grand Haven used 7 running backs and 9 receivers on their way to colossal offensive numbers. No one really "shined" in their commities but they all played well and fresh legs were constantly on the field. Good win for Grand Haven but lets not get ahead of ourselves... it is Ambridge after all.
Las Vegas 3
Great Plains 23
Who saw this coming? Not the result, Great Plains is a great squad, but a blowout of this magnitude against such a strong Vegas squad? It was obvious that the roster changes and lack of chemistry affected the Stunners on this night, where the lack of changes and the ability to form a solid team unit aided Great Plains. Tweeder's EZD had 10 catches for 97 to go along with Lincoln's 5 for 54 and a TD. Zip Yourpantsup chimed in with 2 picks on the defensive side. For Las Vegas, the best performance has to go to Guiherme TheWall with 8 tackles, a sack, 2 pass deflections, and 5 tackles for loss. The game wasn't really close, and Las Vegas needs to discover if they can come together as a team before playoff time or they may be looking at an early exit, if they make the race at all.
Miami 10
Hartford 3
For awhile, Miami was staring at a pretty dismal season. They'd gone 1 and 6 with their only win coming against a pathetic Clams team with tough games against Oakland, New Brunswick, and Las Vegas upcoming. Best way to get back on track? A HUGE win over Hartford (who played Oakland close and beat playoff contender Dallas). The game was close but Hartford just couldn't find an answer for the sole Miami touchdown: a rocket fired from the Korean Cannon to Corey Mendgik for a 15 yard gain. Miami may not win any of the next three games, but at least they did what they needed to do to get morale going in the right direction.
CLOSING STATEMENTS
They say behind every great quarterback is a great offensive line. Don't get me wrong, that statement is definitly true, but a pattern is emerging in 7 West. Behind all our great quarterbacks, there are superb tight ends. Spicewood's RJ Stew? Maija Vilkkumaa. Waco's Hugh Laurie? Theboy Marlowe. Great Plains Hayden Fry? Abra-CRUSH Lincoln. Even Oakland's combo of Cody Wilson and Sara Grimp, which hasn't put up the same numbers as these other pairs, has the potential to be a truly dangerous duo. I wanted to take this time to give the tight ends some noise, because we've got a lot of them making huge plays in the vertical game for their ball clubs. Keep on doin what your doin, as long as it isn't against the Beardogs! WOOF!
Last edited May 13, 2008 06:53:21
