Originally posted by The Big Cack Envy
amace, you are walking the thin line of blasphemy,
careful1 In the beginning Bort created the sim and bought the domain name. 2 Now the website was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of Bort was hovering over the waters.
3 And Bort said, “Let there be GUI,” and there was GUI. 4 Bort saw that the GUI was good, and he separated the GUI from the darkness, making the site public. 5 Bort called the game “GLB,” and the users called it "dotball.” And there was teams, and there was players—the first day.
6 And Bort said, “Let there be forums to interact between the members.” 7 So Bort made the forums and separated them int shit, and shittier sub-forums. And it was so. 8 Bort called the forums “forums.” And there was much rejoicing --- "yay", and there was poosting, and fun was had.
9 And Bort said, “Let the forums be kept in order, and let other enforce these rules.” And it was so. 10 Bort called the these enforcers "moderators,” and the others who overlook the moderators were "Admins.” And Bort saw that it was good.
11 Then Bort said, “Let the Sim I have created become more complex.” And it was so. 12 The Sim produced AI, playbooks, packages, new plays, features: And Bort saw that it was good. 13 And there Coaches, but nobody wanted coaches except for Bort—the third day.
14 And Bort said, “those who moderate the forums no longer be moderators, and let some asshole 12 year olds take over, 15 and let them be have full reign of warnings and bans.” And it was so. 16 Bort made two new changes—free flex become reward points, which are slightly less useful. He also made the rules of the forums which are to create order and avoid any confusion. 17 Bort made them mandatory to read for every member, so they would know exactly where the line is in the forums, 18 to govern the sim and the forums, and to separate the good from the evil. And Bort saw that it was good. 19 And there was good, and there was evil—the fourth day.
20 And Bort said, “Let the Catch22 speak for me, so I no longer have to.” 21 So Bort created the Catch22 who was to be like our big informed friend. Catch did as he could, but was held back by the mighty Bort. 23 And there was joy, but also frustration—the fifth day.
24 And Bort said, “Let the Moderators have even more power, and let anyone who can locate their own dick get moderating powers.” And it was so. 25 Bort made the points system according to recommendations from r8, but it turned against him.
26 Then Bort said, “You may use this to enforce the rules, as per the outlines I provided”
27 So Bort unleashed this mayhem into the forums,
in the image of Bort, he created them;
But the mods don't understant.
28 Bort blessed them and said to them, “The rules are clearly outlined, and any violation and punishment will be used.”
29 But the mods could not follow rules. 30. they ban people for quote pyramids, "spamming" FFA, saying "gay", posting FFA messages in FFA, etc.
31 The users cried out, but Bort ignored. Users like TEY, Darkus, liked and paying users left in protest.
32. then Bort had his DD come to brush it off, but it was not to be had. -- this was day 6.
33. On the seventh day, Bort rested, and GLB died.