(In a Yoda voice.....) Season's Greetings!
Money's short and times are hard,
Here's your Phucking Christmas Card!
(Ah-hem...)
Twas the night before Christmas
and all through the house
Everybody felt sh*tty
even the mouse
Mom at the wh*rehouse
and Dad smoking grass
Had just settled down
for a nice piece of @ss
When out on the lawn
I heard such a clatter
I sprung from my place
to see what was the matter
When out on the lawn
I saw a Big Prick
I knew in a moment
it must be St. Nick
He came down the chimney
Like a bat out of hell (Meatloaf guitar thrash in background)
I knew in a moment
The phucker had fell!
He filled the stockings
With pretzels and beer
and a Big Rubber D*ck
For my brother the queer
He rose up the chimney
With a thunderous Fart
The Son of a B*tch
blew the Chimney apart!
He swore and he cursed
as he rode out of sight
your momma's a wh*re
and that chick is a dike!
(Storm Shadow voice.....) Thank you son.....
Money's short and times are hard,
Here's your Phucking Christmas Card!
(Ah-hem...)
Twas the night before Christmas
and all through the house
Everybody felt sh*tty
even the mouse
Mom at the wh*rehouse
and Dad smoking grass
Had just settled down
for a nice piece of @ss
When out on the lawn
I heard such a clatter
I sprung from my place
to see what was the matter
When out on the lawn
I saw a Big Prick
I knew in a moment
it must be St. Nick
He came down the chimney
Like a bat out of hell (Meatloaf guitar thrash in background)
I knew in a moment
The phucker had fell!
He filled the stockings
With pretzels and beer
and a Big Rubber D*ck
For my brother the queer
He rose up the chimney
With a thunderous Fart
The Son of a B*tch
blew the Chimney apart!
He swore and he cursed
as he rode out of sight
your momma's a wh*re
and that chick is a dike!
(Storm Shadow voice.....) Thank you son.....