Welcome back ladies and gentlemen!! It's been an exciting week here on Mars.
Let's get straight to the business..
In the Alpha Division
The Wiggle Warriors move to 2-0 with a 28-10 win against the new division rival Grape Apes. I Want A Hug started off the second half on a mission in this one, running the ball 9 times for 154 yds and 2 scores. The Wiggle Warriors now sit alone atop the Alpha division. 2-0
Incredible Builds evens out their record at 1-1 after an incredible performance by The Supreme God Of GLB as he just terrorized the Terminus defense to the tune of 705 yds passing and 7 TD's. After last weeks loss this could be the momentum Incredible Buids needed to keep up with the Wiggle Warriors as we dive into the meat of the season. 1-1
Speaking of meat.... It was another rough one for Terminus with the defense having no answer for the Incredible Builds passing game losing 55-17 on their way to 0-2. A couple late TDS in garbage time being the brightest moments for the team. 0-2
The Grapes Apes drop to 1-1 after a heartbreaking loss to the Wiggle Warriors. Shutting out the division rivals in the first half only to run from the Hugger in the 3rd quarter. Despite a late effort from Stupid Sexy Slombo, they couldn't catch up to the new division leader Wiggle Warriors. 1-1
In the Beta Division
The Azteca Dragons sit at the top of the division at 2-0 after they handed the division rival 95 Skers a devastating loss 66-0. Rashaad Penny took over this ballgame from the start with 750 combined yds and 8 scores. Dragons are real people, Dragons are real!!! 2-0
The Logzilla Boys rebounded this week with a close win against 2.0, 28-24. A fourth quarter TD by Rusher was the difference in this one. Rusher ran for 187 yds and 3 scores leading his team into the win column. 1-1
The 95 Skers had the unfortunate luck of facing a Dragon's team that's running people down and got burned as they couldn't get anything going on either side of the ball. Here's looking to next week. 1-1
2.0 looked good this week despite the 4th quarter loss to The Logzilla Boys. Paul Keys providing the teams highlights as he threw for 312 yds and 3 TD'S in this weeks loss. 0-2
In the Gamma Division
The Compton Conspiracy Theorists sit alone atop the division after beating the reigning champion Jarvis Street Coffee Squirrels in nail biter 7-6. Self Help Guru kept the defense fresh running for 213 yds on 40 carries and the games only score. Credit to the defense holding the reigning champs to two FG'S. 2-0
The reigning champion Coffee Squirrels drop a close one to Compton this week as the offense just couldn't get going only providing 2 FG'S for a defense that put on a show this week allowing just a TD to Compton. Is this the fall of our favorite rodents or the motivation for a mid season run to the top?? 1-1
The League of Unremarkable Individuals came out strong after the week one loss defeating the division rival Mediocre Mayhem in a blowout 52-7. The running game was on this week as The Mandalorian and Hem averaged 10.6 yds a carry making short work of the Mediocre defense. 1-1
Mediocre Mayhem drops another one this week and it was ugly. The defense had no answer for the running game and the offense just couldn't get going. The only highlight being a great 31 yd TD pass to Robero Blanco. 0-2
Next week:
The 1-1 Grape Apes head to Incredible Builds
0-2 Terminus heads to visit the undefeated Wiggle Warriors
The 1-1 95 Skers take on the 1-1 Logzilla Boys
0-2 2.0 heads to the fiery land of Azteca to visit the 2-0 Dragons
2-0 Compton goes to The League in the game of the week
The 1-1 Defending Champ Coffee Squirrels face of against 0-2 Mediocre Mayhem
Again this is Daserpent signing out from Mars, the Division where men are made and heroes are written about. Happy Hunting!!