Welcome to Whore Island for the final game of the regular season between the Grape Apes and Bird Valley Eagles. This game will decide who wins Gamma division.
hello to you all. im Jibber Jabber filling in for Biff Barf on Whore Radio. its a snowy day in Whore Island as the Eagles host the Apes.
the Apes receive the opening kickoff and start there first offensive possession with an unusual 3 straight passes to start the drive. thankfully after pressure forced 2 incompletion the Apes managed to hit the TE for a first down. Happy Feet may be a penguin movie but he starts off with a decent gain. a PD on second down and a failed 3rd down rushing conversion lead to our first punt of the game and a touchback.
here comes the Eagles offense for there first possession. a strung out handoff for no gain is followed by a 15 yard completion. the Apes manage to get pressure on the next pass but follow it up by allowing a pitch to get outside contain for a first down. a quick pass is nearly intercepted. a counter sweep allows the blocking to get set up and goes for another first down. the strong Apes defense we have seen all season has not shown up yet today. 3 consecutive rushing plays almost get the first down but MJH gets around the pulling G and blows the play up behind the line of scrimmage.
a quality directional punt pins the Apes inside there own 5 yard line. after a failed attempt to create some room to work by running on first down the Apes manage to escape the shadow of there own goalpost with a 17 yard completion on second down. after a 1 yard rush and an incompletion Your Super Sexy Mom (YSSM) finds VC again for another first down. a Slombo 5 yard rush is followed by a sack to bring up 3rd and long near midfield. throwing at an overload blitz leads to a completion to Mike Hunt just short of a first down.
The Apes punt and the kick leaves them with a failed opportunity to down the ball as it takes a bounce forward into the endzone from the 3 yard line. the Eagles will begin there second offense possession from the 20. Sherman rolls left to avoid pressure but the pass is deflected by Lick Em. after a short rush on second down the Eagles fail to convert a 3rd down pass and will come out to punt. the Apes take over at there own 36 yard line. after Slombo runs for no gain and Happy Feet comes up just short of the line to gain Slombo stumbles forward for a 1 yard gain and a first down. YSSM had all day but could not hook up with Daytime Hooker. after a short run and a incomplete pass the Apes punting unit comes back out on the field. this is looking like it will be a defense game as the snow continues to fall and complicate things for both offenses.
the Eagles take over just past there own 20 yard line but go 3 and out. The Apes almost blow a chance to start with excellent field position by fumbling the punt return. thankfully ol Rusty managed to fall on it and the Apes offense takes the field at the 42 yard line. unfortunately things quickly reverse as Slombo loses a fumble giving the Eagles excellent field position recovering at the Apes 47. Twitch picks up the Apes first sack of the game putting the Eagles behind the chains. a PD and another sack force the Eagles to punt.
the Apes take over from the 20 after a touchback. Happy Feet runs 30 yards to gain 1. YSSM hooks up with Cybertron for a much needed first down only to take a sack the next play after not attempting to step up in the pocket to avoid the rush. Slombo drops a pass but makes up for it by breaking a big run off tackle and picking up 28 yards. not to be outdone Happy Feet carries out of a 4WR formation and outruns the defense for our first score of the game and a 45 yard TD.
The Eagles start there possession with a short gain followed by consecutive TFL. the Apes start at there 34 after the 3 and out but YSSM takes a sack to open the possession. an incomplete pass and a run for no gain bring out the punting unit. The Eagles start from there own 36 yardline with a 5 yard gain. after a modest gain on second down Dennis scrambles to the left but cant get past the defense and the play goes for no gain. the Apes take over inside there own 25 yardline.
3 consecutive rushing plays show a conservative offense that looks like it just wants to get in out of the snowy cold for halftime. after a punt the Eagles take over at the 35 with 3:16 remaining in the half. after a TLF MJY comes up with a strip sack which Very Nice recovers to give the Apes there best starting field position of the game. Mario Williams who has been harassing YSSM all game turns the tables the very next play with there own strip sack and the Eagles have the ball back.
Disparaging 2 Women comes up with a sack as its looking like both offensive lines are ready to give up and go home. somehow Jeff Green comes down with a big catch for 18 yards that secures a crucial 1st down. fellow TE Red Bird follows this up with there own 15 yard catch as the Eagles cross midfield. Dennis avoids a coverage sack and scrambles for 6 yards. the clock is becoming a factor as the Eagles use there first timeout. Dennis scrambles again and picks up a first down well getting out of bounds to stop the clock. its 1st and 10 from the 20 yardline with 1:11 left to play in the first half. Dennis comes back to reality with an incomplete pass and then takes a sack. for some reason the Eagles elect not to use there 2nd timeout and follow that up with a rushing play for no gain. Yung Hoe Ku hits a 45 yard FG as the second half ends. at halftime the score is Apes 7 - Eagles 3.
Bird Valley gets the ball to open the second half. not a strong start with 2 TLF followed by a sack and the Eagles will be punting. The Apes start with 2 short runs before YSSM hooks up with Mike Hunt again for a huge 56 yard TD pass. The Eagles have the ball again trailing 14-3. TFL, Sack and 1 yard gain as they go 3 and out as moral starts to take control of the game. the Apes open there drive with an 8 yard rush followed by YSSM hitting Tight Whore for a 1st down. after a pair of incompletions YSSM continues the Apes drive down the field by hooking up with Tight Whore again converting a 3rd and 10 via a 17 yard gain. after Slombo softens up the Eagles defense Happy Feet goes untouched up the middle for a 30 yard TD as this game starts to get out of hand.
Eagles go 3 and out again after 3 plays net them 2 yards. YSSM starts the next series off hot with a pair of daggers over the middle as the Apes come out firing. after taking 1 play to run the ball YSSM connects again for another 1st down. after an incomplete pass and 2 running plays the Apes will be happy to take the 41 yard FG and start playing the clock.
the Eagles manage to get one 1st down before MJY picks up another strip sack which Sex Very Nice recovers to give the Apes the ball deep in Eagles territory. not content to rush more then once at a time YSSM hits Tight Whore who is tackles inside the 5 yardline. Slombo converts his on his second attempt for a rushing TD.
can the Eagles do anything to jump start a comeback down 31-3 early in the 4th quarter? the Eagles march down the field over 6 plays and get into the redzone only to be sacked right back out of it. another sack after an incomplete pass takes them our of FG range as they line up to punt. after a pair of inside rushes to play the clock YSSM has had enough of this game and hits Mike Hunt for a massive 80 yard touchdown.
The Eagles manage to lose yards on there next drive despite converting for a 1st down. this game has really gotten away from them in the second half. The Apes go 3 and out but with 2 rushing plays they are salting away the clock. the Eagles turn the ball over on downs as this game reaches the final 3 minutes after a Slombo run. followed up by a 20+ yard run for the mighty Slombo we see a pair of carries to cover the 2 minute warning and force and Eagles to take there 2nd time out only for YSSM to hit Mike Hunt once again on 3rd down for a 16 yard TD.
the Apes TEs have really come up huge in the second half to help break the game open. The Eagles start to drive down the field only for Rey Roy to come up with what is more or less a game ending interception. Bird Vally gets the ball back on last time but cant score before the clock runs out. Final score Apes 45 - Eagles 3
hello to you all. im Jibber Jabber filling in for Biff Barf on Whore Radio. its a snowy day in Whore Island as the Eagles host the Apes.
the Apes receive the opening kickoff and start there first offensive possession with an unusual 3 straight passes to start the drive. thankfully after pressure forced 2 incompletion the Apes managed to hit the TE for a first down. Happy Feet may be a penguin movie but he starts off with a decent gain. a PD on second down and a failed 3rd down rushing conversion lead to our first punt of the game and a touchback.
here comes the Eagles offense for there first possession. a strung out handoff for no gain is followed by a 15 yard completion. the Apes manage to get pressure on the next pass but follow it up by allowing a pitch to get outside contain for a first down. a quick pass is nearly intercepted. a counter sweep allows the blocking to get set up and goes for another first down. the strong Apes defense we have seen all season has not shown up yet today. 3 consecutive rushing plays almost get the first down but MJH gets around the pulling G and blows the play up behind the line of scrimmage.
a quality directional punt pins the Apes inside there own 5 yard line. after a failed attempt to create some room to work by running on first down the Apes manage to escape the shadow of there own goalpost with a 17 yard completion on second down. after a 1 yard rush and an incompletion Your Super Sexy Mom (YSSM) finds VC again for another first down. a Slombo 5 yard rush is followed by a sack to bring up 3rd and long near midfield. throwing at an overload blitz leads to a completion to Mike Hunt just short of a first down.
The Apes punt and the kick leaves them with a failed opportunity to down the ball as it takes a bounce forward into the endzone from the 3 yard line. the Eagles will begin there second offense possession from the 20. Sherman rolls left to avoid pressure but the pass is deflected by Lick Em. after a short rush on second down the Eagles fail to convert a 3rd down pass and will come out to punt. the Apes take over at there own 36 yard line. after Slombo runs for no gain and Happy Feet comes up just short of the line to gain Slombo stumbles forward for a 1 yard gain and a first down. YSSM had all day but could not hook up with Daytime Hooker. after a short run and a incomplete pass the Apes punting unit comes back out on the field. this is looking like it will be a defense game as the snow continues to fall and complicate things for both offenses.
the Eagles take over just past there own 20 yard line but go 3 and out. The Apes almost blow a chance to start with excellent field position by fumbling the punt return. thankfully ol Rusty managed to fall on it and the Apes offense takes the field at the 42 yard line. unfortunately things quickly reverse as Slombo loses a fumble giving the Eagles excellent field position recovering at the Apes 47. Twitch picks up the Apes first sack of the game putting the Eagles behind the chains. a PD and another sack force the Eagles to punt.
the Apes take over from the 20 after a touchback. Happy Feet runs 30 yards to gain 1. YSSM hooks up with Cybertron for a much needed first down only to take a sack the next play after not attempting to step up in the pocket to avoid the rush. Slombo drops a pass but makes up for it by breaking a big run off tackle and picking up 28 yards. not to be outdone Happy Feet carries out of a 4WR formation and outruns the defense for our first score of the game and a 45 yard TD.
The Eagles start there possession with a short gain followed by consecutive TFL. the Apes start at there 34 after the 3 and out but YSSM takes a sack to open the possession. an incomplete pass and a run for no gain bring out the punting unit. The Eagles start from there own 36 yardline with a 5 yard gain. after a modest gain on second down Dennis scrambles to the left but cant get past the defense and the play goes for no gain. the Apes take over inside there own 25 yardline.
3 consecutive rushing plays show a conservative offense that looks like it just wants to get in out of the snowy cold for halftime. after a punt the Eagles take over at the 35 with 3:16 remaining in the half. after a TLF MJY comes up with a strip sack which Very Nice recovers to give the Apes there best starting field position of the game. Mario Williams who has been harassing YSSM all game turns the tables the very next play with there own strip sack and the Eagles have the ball back.
Disparaging 2 Women comes up with a sack as its looking like both offensive lines are ready to give up and go home. somehow Jeff Green comes down with a big catch for 18 yards that secures a crucial 1st down. fellow TE Red Bird follows this up with there own 15 yard catch as the Eagles cross midfield. Dennis avoids a coverage sack and scrambles for 6 yards. the clock is becoming a factor as the Eagles use there first timeout. Dennis scrambles again and picks up a first down well getting out of bounds to stop the clock. its 1st and 10 from the 20 yardline with 1:11 left to play in the first half. Dennis comes back to reality with an incomplete pass and then takes a sack. for some reason the Eagles elect not to use there 2nd timeout and follow that up with a rushing play for no gain. Yung Hoe Ku hits a 45 yard FG as the second half ends. at halftime the score is Apes 7 - Eagles 3.
Bird Valley gets the ball to open the second half. not a strong start with 2 TLF followed by a sack and the Eagles will be punting. The Apes start with 2 short runs before YSSM hooks up with Mike Hunt again for a huge 56 yard TD pass. The Eagles have the ball again trailing 14-3. TFL, Sack and 1 yard gain as they go 3 and out as moral starts to take control of the game. the Apes open there drive with an 8 yard rush followed by YSSM hitting Tight Whore for a 1st down. after a pair of incompletions YSSM continues the Apes drive down the field by hooking up with Tight Whore again converting a 3rd and 10 via a 17 yard gain. after Slombo softens up the Eagles defense Happy Feet goes untouched up the middle for a 30 yard TD as this game starts to get out of hand.
Eagles go 3 and out again after 3 plays net them 2 yards. YSSM starts the next series off hot with a pair of daggers over the middle as the Apes come out firing. after taking 1 play to run the ball YSSM connects again for another 1st down. after an incomplete pass and 2 running plays the Apes will be happy to take the 41 yard FG and start playing the clock.
the Eagles manage to get one 1st down before MJY picks up another strip sack which Sex Very Nice recovers to give the Apes the ball deep in Eagles territory. not content to rush more then once at a time YSSM hits Tight Whore who is tackles inside the 5 yardline. Slombo converts his on his second attempt for a rushing TD.
can the Eagles do anything to jump start a comeback down 31-3 early in the 4th quarter? the Eagles march down the field over 6 plays and get into the redzone only to be sacked right back out of it. another sack after an incomplete pass takes them our of FG range as they line up to punt. after a pair of inside rushes to play the clock YSSM has had enough of this game and hits Mike Hunt for a massive 80 yard touchdown.
The Eagles manage to lose yards on there next drive despite converting for a 1st down. this game has really gotten away from them in the second half. The Apes go 3 and out but with 2 rushing plays they are salting away the clock. the Eagles turn the ball over on downs as this game reaches the final 3 minutes after a Slombo run. followed up by a 20+ yard run for the mighty Slombo we see a pair of carries to cover the 2 minute warning and force and Eagles to take there 2nd time out only for YSSM to hit Mike Hunt once again on 3rd down for a 16 yard TD.
the Apes TEs have really come up huge in the second half to help break the game open. The Eagles start to drive down the field only for Rey Roy to come up with what is more or less a game ending interception. Bird Vally gets the ball back on last time but cant score before the clock runs out. Final score Apes 45 - Eagles 3
