This week write up is straight shots, no chasers.
(4-1) Compton Con Men vs (0-5) Orlando Warriors
Warriors hits the road to take on CCM in Week 6, and there are just four stats you need to know to understand where this game is going: Orlando scores in the neighborhood of 14 points per game and allows over 40. Con Men tosses up between 30 to 40 plus and restricts teams to a stingy diet of 2 TD's (limit) per game.
While surfinhi is calculating how to get the ball down-field, QB Dexter Morgan is going to be showing them exactly how it's done with TE Bramble Pan Axl and WR Danny Amendola.
Compton averages through the air what Orlando does in total yards per game. This will not be fun for Warriors, and likely to end up in a shutout.
(4-1) Drunken Potato Farmers vs (1-4) Drunken RedZone Zombies
Similarities between the two teams? Well, they're both Drunken, and...well, that's it.
Drunken Potato has faced some crazy rough competition in Con Men and Philadelphia, and slid upwards to finish off the Hellraisers. HB Big Gain is a sexy piece of dynamite waiting to explode.
For the last few games, the RedZone Zombies was busy getting finger fucked by D.C, CCM and the Stunners after its lone win over Orlando Warriors. DRZ's QB Joe Montana seemed to figure out the whole "offense" in the 2nd and 3rd week, but faltered again in back-to-back clashes. The issue here is that, regardless of its opponent, their offense has serious issues finding the end zone-- when needing to close out a big game.
Unless something drastic changes before kickoff, this game will be another notch in BadgerPhil's belt.
(4-1) MMArmy Can Crushers vs (3-2) D.C. Corrupt Politicians
D.C is averaging over 600 passing yards per game this season, and it has virtually no rushing attack. (Why would the Politicians even care with that aerial assault?)*** But please do not allow these numbers to bitch you into thinking Corrupt has a shot in hell.
MMArmy's offense should theoretically have its way with D.C's defense. Whether it's Big Ben from under center or the Turbo Torres/Hulkamania Runnin Wild On You tandem in the backfield, no formation is going to stop all three of them at once.
Crushers is not a lock for the play-offs by any means, but it's going to take a superior talented and gritty squad to beat the Can. And Corrupt is not that team.
(5-0) Minnesota Stunners vs (3-2) Jersey Goons
The Goons are trying to move past the Philly upset as quickly and painlessly as possible.
The deciding factor here is not going to be as deep as in some other games. Both offenses rely heavily on the run (Minnesota exclusively on the ground), and rushing defense will determine the outcome.
Jersey just learned firsthand exactly what happens when you walk into a game expecting to win. Now they get another tough lesson in what it feels like to play the STUNNERS!
The most entertaining part of this game are the colors Yellow and Blue. It's going to be everywhere.
(0-5) Oregon Ducks vs (1-4) Alliance Cobras
When you merge the two records, you get 1-9 this season, and they have the misfortune of holding this week's "somebody-has-to-suck-more-than-us" bowl. Stats between these two teams are laughable, as they mean less than nothing. If you are both losing terribly, does it really matter who's losing less badly? (In some cases, yes, but not in this one.)
Alliance had a fluffy game against the Bling in Week 1, then shit hit the fan. This doesn't say that the Cobras are destined to fail for seasons to come, but it does mean that a rebuilding roster is going to hit them extremely hard.
Oregon haven't won a single league match this season. Despite unexpectedly competing well against Compton for majority of the game, the Ducks are still a stone's throw away from their 1st win~ even over a team like the Cobras. If Oregon plays to its recent level, it will keep this game close.
GM coachjbax should want the win badly, but desire is not going to stop QB Ryan Tannyhill and SS Beat Down all by itself. .
(2-3) Drinkin Hellraisers vs (3-2) Philadelphia Bling
Drinkin still hasn't proven that it can cope with belonging to such an awesome league. They have shown that they have the raw talent to win against a good number of teams, but the problem is execution. Philly outclass the Hellraisers in almost every facets of the game. Drinkin have just one advantage over Bling, and that's the pass.
Would of this game happened in Week 2, the prediction might have been different. This bout will be good, but it won't be as good as some may have hoped during the off-season for those who cared to forecast the schedule.
But now knowing what you know- If you don't take WR Thomas Richardson against the Hellraisers defense, you have a lot more faith in Kyle Stobie than most others do.
When the clock strikes zero in the fourth quarter, Philadelphia is going to be tired, sweaty and victorious.
(4-1) Compton Con Men vs (0-5) Orlando Warriors
Warriors hits the road to take on CCM in Week 6, and there are just four stats you need to know to understand where this game is going: Orlando scores in the neighborhood of 14 points per game and allows over 40. Con Men tosses up between 30 to 40 plus and restricts teams to a stingy diet of 2 TD's (limit) per game.
While surfinhi is calculating how to get the ball down-field, QB Dexter Morgan is going to be showing them exactly how it's done with TE Bramble Pan Axl and WR Danny Amendola.
Compton averages through the air what Orlando does in total yards per game. This will not be fun for Warriors, and likely to end up in a shutout.
(4-1) Drunken Potato Farmers vs (1-4) Drunken RedZone Zombies
Similarities between the two teams? Well, they're both Drunken, and...well, that's it.
Drunken Potato has faced some crazy rough competition in Con Men and Philadelphia, and slid upwards to finish off the Hellraisers. HB Big Gain is a sexy piece of dynamite waiting to explode.
For the last few games, the RedZone Zombies was busy getting finger fucked by D.C, CCM and the Stunners after its lone win over Orlando Warriors. DRZ's QB Joe Montana seemed to figure out the whole "offense" in the 2nd and 3rd week, but faltered again in back-to-back clashes. The issue here is that, regardless of its opponent, their offense has serious issues finding the end zone-- when needing to close out a big game.
Unless something drastic changes before kickoff, this game will be another notch in BadgerPhil's belt.
(4-1) MMArmy Can Crushers vs (3-2) D.C. Corrupt Politicians
D.C is averaging over 600 passing yards per game this season, and it has virtually no rushing attack. (Why would the Politicians even care with that aerial assault?)*** But please do not allow these numbers to bitch you into thinking Corrupt has a shot in hell.
MMArmy's offense should theoretically have its way with D.C's defense. Whether it's Big Ben from under center or the Turbo Torres/Hulkamania Runnin Wild On You tandem in the backfield, no formation is going to stop all three of them at once.
Crushers is not a lock for the play-offs by any means, but it's going to take a superior talented and gritty squad to beat the Can. And Corrupt is not that team.
(5-0) Minnesota Stunners vs (3-2) Jersey Goons
The Goons are trying to move past the Philly upset as quickly and painlessly as possible.
The deciding factor here is not going to be as deep as in some other games. Both offenses rely heavily on the run (Minnesota exclusively on the ground), and rushing defense will determine the outcome.
Jersey just learned firsthand exactly what happens when you walk into a game expecting to win. Now they get another tough lesson in what it feels like to play the STUNNERS!
The most entertaining part of this game are the colors Yellow and Blue. It's going to be everywhere.
(0-5) Oregon Ducks vs (1-4) Alliance Cobras
When you merge the two records, you get 1-9 this season, and they have the misfortune of holding this week's "somebody-has-to-suck-more-than-us" bowl. Stats between these two teams are laughable, as they mean less than nothing. If you are both losing terribly, does it really matter who's losing less badly? (In some cases, yes, but not in this one.)
Alliance had a fluffy game against the Bling in Week 1, then shit hit the fan. This doesn't say that the Cobras are destined to fail for seasons to come, but it does mean that a rebuilding roster is going to hit them extremely hard.
Oregon haven't won a single league match this season. Despite unexpectedly competing well against Compton for majority of the game, the Ducks are still a stone's throw away from their 1st win~ even over a team like the Cobras. If Oregon plays to its recent level, it will keep this game close.
GM coachjbax should want the win badly, but desire is not going to stop QB Ryan Tannyhill and SS Beat Down all by itself. .
(2-3) Drinkin Hellraisers vs (3-2) Philadelphia Bling
Drinkin still hasn't proven that it can cope with belonging to such an awesome league. They have shown that they have the raw talent to win against a good number of teams, but the problem is execution. Philly outclass the Hellraisers in almost every facets of the game. Drinkin have just one advantage over Bling, and that's the pass.
Would of this game happened in Week 2, the prediction might have been different. This bout will be good, but it won't be as good as some may have hoped during the off-season for those who cared to forecast the schedule.
But now knowing what you know- If you don't take WR Thomas Richardson against the Hellraisers defense, you have a lot more faith in Kyle Stobie than most others do.
When the clock strikes zero in the fourth quarter, Philadelphia is going to be tired, sweaty and victorious.
