How competitive is this year's crop of rookies? Well, we lost the last undefeated rookie team a while back, there are currently 3 teams tied for #9 on the ladder, and we've yet to have the same #1 team even two ladder games in a row since I started writing my countdowns.
Spoiler alert on that last point. I don't think we're going to have it happen this time either.
#9 (tied) Cedar Rapids Reapers vs #5 Baby BANGER
Welcome to the top ten Cedar Rapids! Take a look around. Make yourself comfortable. Maybe grab some of the complimentary packs of honey roasted peanuts from the bar. But make it quick since you won't be here long.
You see, while SoggyTaco might be somewhat obnoxious (pot...kettle...black...I know), he has put together a pretty good team. On the other hand, y'all are stuck with JohnHunstman2016 who might very well someday go down in GLB2 history as the losingest coach of all time.
BANGER 30 - Reapers 13
#9 (tied) Alaska Assassins vs #6 1995 Nebraska Future Convicts
Alaska has been happy to hang out around the fringes of the top ten for a while now. They are a good team, but they just haven't found that last little bit that will get them solidly into contention for winning the rookie ladder. Given that they are likely one of the best balanced teams in the rookie top ten, it's going to be scary for the rest of the rookies if they ever do.
Nebraska, on the other hand, is extremely heavy into running. If you can stop that running game, they don't really have anything to fall back on. That's a problem because a couple teams have already done just that this season, and you have to figure it will eventually occur to everyone else to simply cut and paste those defensive gameplans (hint hint).
Alaska 24 - Nebraska 7
#9 (tied) Lincoln City Red Imps vs #15 South End Revenge
We finally come to the last of our three #9 teams. I'm not sure who Lincoln City bribed to get what is likely the easiest of the top ten ladder matchups, but I'd like their name so Yorick's can never again get stuck playing a team in a ladder match coached by the same people that BOTH of their likely playoff opponents are coached by.
Anyway, it's tough to see how the Red Imps don't run away with this. South End might not even be a playoff team, and they really don't match up well against the Red Imps's high scoring offense. Their one chance might be that the Red Imps have struggled against the pass defensively, and South End has solid, albeit not spectacular, passing game.
Red Imps 44 - Revenge 30
#8 Sexy Dance Fighters vs #7 Rhode Island Falcons
Last ladder, Sexy was held to no points in regulation. Fortunately for them, their opponents fared no better. The only thing that kept that game from being a soccer match was a really luck dice roll in overtime that finally let them break a big play. The problem is that you can't count on lucky dice rolls against a team like the Falcons.
Offensively, these two teams are polar opposites. The Falcons have a a low-risk possession pass attack. The Dance Fighters are all about high-risk running plays. They can both put up points. It's on defense, though, that the Falcons have the advantage. They simply don't give up a lot of points, and they'll have the advantage of knowing that Sexy lives and dies with outside runs whereas the Dance Fighters are going to see a variety of WR's catching the ball all over the field.
Falcons 27 - Sexy 14
#4 Victorious Secret vs #2 Jesse Venturas
Last week I made another in my series of snarky comments about how stupid the name "Stunners" is for a team and was rewarded with a completely unwanted pro wrestling history lesson for my trouble. Fine. Y'all want pro wrestling, from here on out I shall refer to the Minnesota Stunners as the Jesse Venturas.
This might very well be the best game of the round. The entire game hinges on one thing: can Victorious stop what is one of the most effective run teams in the rookie ranks in the Venturas. Given that Secret has only allowed 370 yards rushing in their league play, they have as good a chance at it as anyone. Still, I just don't think it's going to be enough, and we're likely to see the Venturas at the top of next round's ladder.
Jesse Venturas 14 - Victorious Secret 10
#3 Nigerian Minimares vs #1 All Madden
I want to apologize to the Minimares. Last game I made a My Little Pony joke. Unfortunately, this got them all hot and bothered thinking about that sexy, sexy Pinkie Pie and left them totally unable to focus on the game. The result was a 57 to nil beatdown at the hand of the Jesse Venturas. This week I promise not to mention any My Little Ponies, and especially not Twilight, Apple Jack, Fluttershy, Rarity, or Rainbow Dash.
With that out of the way, let's talk about what is sure to be the second best game of this round (unless of course the Minimares can't stop thinking about getting some tail. which is funny cuz horses have tails. get it?). All Madden is an outstanding team, and if any team is going to hold on to the top spot two rounds, they'd be my pick. But I just think that friendship really will be magic and the Minimares can pull off the upset.
Nigerian 10 - All Madden 7
Spoiler alert on that last point. I don't think we're going to have it happen this time either.
#9 (tied) Cedar Rapids Reapers vs #5 Baby BANGER
Welcome to the top ten Cedar Rapids! Take a look around. Make yourself comfortable. Maybe grab some of the complimentary packs of honey roasted peanuts from the bar. But make it quick since you won't be here long.
You see, while SoggyTaco might be somewhat obnoxious (pot...kettle...black...I know), he has put together a pretty good team. On the other hand, y'all are stuck with JohnHunstman2016 who might very well someday go down in GLB2 history as the losingest coach of all time.
BANGER 30 - Reapers 13
#9 (tied) Alaska Assassins vs #6 1995 Nebraska Future Convicts
Alaska has been happy to hang out around the fringes of the top ten for a while now. They are a good team, but they just haven't found that last little bit that will get them solidly into contention for winning the rookie ladder. Given that they are likely one of the best balanced teams in the rookie top ten, it's going to be scary for the rest of the rookies if they ever do.
Nebraska, on the other hand, is extremely heavy into running. If you can stop that running game, they don't really have anything to fall back on. That's a problem because a couple teams have already done just that this season, and you have to figure it will eventually occur to everyone else to simply cut and paste those defensive gameplans (hint hint).
Alaska 24 - Nebraska 7
#9 (tied) Lincoln City Red Imps vs #15 South End Revenge
We finally come to the last of our three #9 teams. I'm not sure who Lincoln City bribed to get what is likely the easiest of the top ten ladder matchups, but I'd like their name so Yorick's can never again get stuck playing a team in a ladder match coached by the same people that BOTH of their likely playoff opponents are coached by.
Anyway, it's tough to see how the Red Imps don't run away with this. South End might not even be a playoff team, and they really don't match up well against the Red Imps's high scoring offense. Their one chance might be that the Red Imps have struggled against the pass defensively, and South End has solid, albeit not spectacular, passing game.
Red Imps 44 - Revenge 30
#8 Sexy Dance Fighters vs #7 Rhode Island Falcons
Last ladder, Sexy was held to no points in regulation. Fortunately for them, their opponents fared no better. The only thing that kept that game from being a soccer match was a really luck dice roll in overtime that finally let them break a big play. The problem is that you can't count on lucky dice rolls against a team like the Falcons.
Offensively, these two teams are polar opposites. The Falcons have a a low-risk possession pass attack. The Dance Fighters are all about high-risk running plays. They can both put up points. It's on defense, though, that the Falcons have the advantage. They simply don't give up a lot of points, and they'll have the advantage of knowing that Sexy lives and dies with outside runs whereas the Dance Fighters are going to see a variety of WR's catching the ball all over the field.
Falcons 27 - Sexy 14
#4 Victorious Secret vs #2 Jesse Venturas
Last week I made another in my series of snarky comments about how stupid the name "Stunners" is for a team and was rewarded with a completely unwanted pro wrestling history lesson for my trouble. Fine. Y'all want pro wrestling, from here on out I shall refer to the Minnesota Stunners as the Jesse Venturas.
This might very well be the best game of the round. The entire game hinges on one thing: can Victorious stop what is one of the most effective run teams in the rookie ranks in the Venturas. Given that Secret has only allowed 370 yards rushing in their league play, they have as good a chance at it as anyone. Still, I just don't think it's going to be enough, and we're likely to see the Venturas at the top of next round's ladder.
Jesse Venturas 14 - Victorious Secret 10
#3 Nigerian Minimares vs #1 All Madden
I want to apologize to the Minimares. Last game I made a My Little Pony joke. Unfortunately, this got them all hot and bothered thinking about that sexy, sexy Pinkie Pie and left them totally unable to focus on the game. The result was a 57 to nil beatdown at the hand of the Jesse Venturas. This week I promise not to mention any My Little Ponies, and especially not Twilight, Apple Jack, Fluttershy, Rarity, or Rainbow Dash.
With that out of the way, let's talk about what is sure to be the second best game of this round (unless of course the Minimares can't stop thinking about getting some tail. which is funny cuz horses have tails. get it?). All Madden is an outstanding team, and if any team is going to hold on to the top spot two rounds, they'd be my pick. But I just think that friendship really will be magic and the Minimares can pull off the upset.
Nigerian 10 - All Madden 7
