Welcome to week 11, chuckle heads!!!!!
Some teams have stepped up and some have stepped off a cliff.
where has your team gone?
GLB is one big ass mystery...........................
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FysobubtDcI
A lot of crazy action happened last week, upset losses, surprising defeats and some teams just kept rolling on.
It just goes to show that some teams are stepping up to the challenge that is World League competition.
If you can't stand the heat, drink another Pina Colada and pass the fuck out!!
At least that's what my Uncle Morty used to say. He died, btw, from alcoholism and a severe sun burn.
Let's get to the action!!!!!!!
Even More New Hot Chick Lounge Members!!!
Well we had to do it. We had no choice but to put some new teams into the Lounge where they will be cared for and fed and sheltered by some of the sluttiest and trshiest women ever known to man, woman or a 12 inch vibrator. (God bless there little hearts)
So the new teams come to us from Zeta this week.
The College Town NWA Feeble Minds have flunked out of school and will be spending time with the Lounge cheer leading squad.
And the C-Town Hoodlums. They are usually the ones doin' the bitch slappin', but they will be the ones getting slapped by the girls in the HCL. It was their request and they did pay a little extra for that kind of action.
So see ya' guys next season and enjoy the booze, broads and the always free penicillin shots given out by students that almost passed the MCAT's. They might have passed had they not gone to College Town.
SA's Player of the Week
And the POW goes to.....................
Queen City kicker, Sebastian "Sea Bass" Janikowski! YAY!!
"Sea Bass" was a mad polish powder head in the 4th quarter of the game against Sparta last week. He traded off FG's back and forth with the Sparta kicker and sending it to OT where Janikowski kicked the game winner as well!
That's what I call moxie!
So here's to you, Sebastian "Sea Bass" Janikowski..............................
http://i378.photobucket.com/albums/oo227/jason41470/Warsteiner_4a9ec543d47f2.jpg
SALUTE!!!
An SA Fairy Tale.
When the three bears came home, they saw Goldilocks fast asleep in their bed.
They stripped off their clothes, popped a Viagra, looked at each other and said....................
..............................LET'S DO THIS SHIT!!!
...................true story, chuckle heads.
You may or may not agree with them, but this is how I see them.
****ALPHA CONFERENCE POWER RANKINGS****
LW = Last Week ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched
#1 Chocolate Blaze (9-0) LW1 - Welcome to double digit wins!!!! YAY!!!
Next opponent: at #13 Windhoek White Rhinos (2-7)
#2 Warsaw Wrath (8-1) LW2 - Well that loss just sucked. But you can take out some Wrath on some kids with Tourettes if you like.
Go ahead, kick them while they are down, it will make you feel better to beat up these goofy bastards.
Next opponent: #10 La Tourette Syndrome (4-5)
#3 East St Louis Tire Fires (7-2) LW3 - You guys could go take a nap and still get the win here. Congrats on win #8 and please remember to thank the Ghost Riders, maybe send them a nice fruit basket or a soft core porn.
Next opponent: at #15 Ghost Riders In The Sky (1-8)
#4 Indianapolis Gurupies (7-2) LW5 - Well it doesn't take a genius to know who the stud is on the O-line, it's LOT Bi curious.
he can play the right or the left side with ease and enjoys playing either side.
Yep, you guessed it, bi Curious goes both ways.
Next opponent: at #11 Honolulu Hurricane Wife Carriers (3-6)
#5 Providence Radicals (7-2) LW4 - You guys are 7-2, the Battle chickens are 5-4. You both are looking to keep winning, but only one will. You guys want to be the one that keeps on winning, right?
Then I guess it's time that you guys went and choked the chicken. (Ok, you guys knew I would have to use that reference sooner or later.)
Next opponent: at #9 Sparta Battle Chickens (5-4)
#6 [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF] (6-3) LW7 - G...........O............W............!
Next opponent: at #8 NBA Jam (5-4)
#7 Queen City Black Cats (6-3) LW8 - Man that was a close win! And after a nail biter like that, you guys probably need a................
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2RHTiXvELNg
...............VACATION!!!
Enjoy, fun, sun, fine dining and shopping!!!
There's nothing a bunch of queens like more than a day of shopping and acting like the Sex in the City girls.
Next opponent: at #16 Graz Grizzlies (0-9)
#8 NBA Jam (5-4) LW9 - Ooooh-weeee!! It's the GOW for you Jam'ers!!
Btw, great upset win over ESL, it couldn't have come at a better time.
Next opponent: #6 [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF] (6-3)
#9 Sparta Battle Chickens (5-4) LW6 - I am not going to lie to you Battle Chickens. You gots a tough road ahead of you and getting enough wins to make it to the playoffs will be difficult, some of you may not make it alive.
Actually, most of you may not make it alive.
In fact, none of you may make it back alive from this stretch of games.
You will ALL die.
Have fun.
Next opponent: #5 Providence Radicals (7-2)
#10 La Tourette Syndrome (4-5) LW11 - Congrats on that last win! I think it is all due to that CB duo of CJ Woodson and Franky4Fingers.
Franky used to be a prison guard at Leavenworth and lost six of his ten fingers in a tragic anal cavity search accident.
How he got six fingers in one ass, you got me.
CJ Woodson changed his name from BJ Woodson, I'll let your imaginations run wild to what BJ stood for.
Next opponent: at #2 Warsaw Wrath
#11 Honolulu Hurricane Wife Carriers (3-6) LW10 - After this next loss to the Gurupies, you guys could start tearing through the second half. Maybe 9 wins if you work at it, maybe a post season invite if you persevere, maybe a front row seat in the HCL if you suck.
Next opponent: #4 Indianapolis Gurupies (7-2)
#12 October Wildfire (2-7) LW14 - A certain somebody, I won't mention NiborRis' name, but he talked me into sparing the Wildfire from going into the Hot Chick Lounge, so far you guys are proving worth saving with a win, but can you keep it up is the real question.
Next opponent: at #14 Krungthep Garudas (2-7)
#13 Windhoek White Rhinos (2-7) LW12 - Blaze and Indy both up next equals loss 8 and loss 9, which equals an invite to the Lounge.
I think it's time.
Next opponent: #1 Chocolate Blaze (9-0)
#14 Krungthep Garudas (2-7) LW13 - Ok, here's the situation. You guys have the opportunity to make a big run at 8-8 if you can start AND maintain a win streak. Coincidentally, starting and maintaining is the problem I supposedly had according to the ex.......................you know what she is.
Next opponent: #12 October Wildfire (2-7)
#15 Ghost Riders In The Sky (1-8) LW15 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2002/07manda/Manda-22.jpg
Next opponent: #3 East St Louis Tire Fires (7-2)
#16 Graz Grizzlies (0-9) LW16 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2002/07michelle/Michelle-05.jpg
Next opponent: #7 Queen City Black Cats (6-3)
*****WEEK 10 ALPHA CONFERENCE PREDICTIONS*****
Here's my prediction record week by week.
Week 1: 7-1 Week 2: 6-2 Week 3: 6-2 Week 4: 7-1 Week 5: 5-3 Week 6: 6-2 Week 7: 7-1 Week 8: 7-1 Week 9: 5-3
Overall: 56-16
SA’s GOW: 8-1
Magic 8 Ball’s GOW: 4-5
#12 October Wildfire (2-7) at #14 Krungthep Garudas (2-7) = October Wildfire
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#7 Queen City Black Cats (6-3) at #16 Graz Grizzlies (0-9) = Queen City Black Cats
Game Rating: 1/6 beers
#6 [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF] (6-3) at #8 NBA Jam (5-4) = NBA Jam
Game Rating: /6 beers
#5 Providence Radicals (7-2) at #9 Sparta Battle Chickens (5-4) = Providence Radicals
Game Rating: 5/6 beers
#3 East St Louis Tire Fires (7-2) at #15 Ghost Riders In The Sky (1-8) = East St Louis Tire Fires
Game Rating: 1/6 beers
#4 Indianapolis Gurupies (7-2) at #11 Honolulu Hurricane Wife Carriers (3-6) = Indianapolis Gurupies
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#10 La Tourette Syndrome (4-5) at #2 Warsaw Wrath (8-1) = Warsaw Wrath
Game Rating: 3/6 beers
#1 Chocolate Blaze (9-0) at #13 Windhoek White Rhinos (2-7) = Chocolate Blaze
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
*Game Of The Week* (GOW)
#6 [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF] (6-3) at #8 NBA Jam (5-4) -
We have a GOW game that has post season implications written all over it!!!
Hurf and Durf and the NBA Jam both need this win to keep them ahead of the rest!
If I mixed a tablespoon of toughness with a teaspoon of roughness and stirred it into a gallon of GLBalls, then baked at 350 for 45 minutes and served them with care, you would get these two teams right here!!
There is only one way to settle this kind of match!
This one will be a "Who Dropped the Soap Match"!!!!
I don't think I really need to 'splain this one to yous guys, but I will anyways.
You see, in prison there are no video games, no watching DVD's in Hi-Def or Blue Ray, there is no web surfing for fine, upstanding, good old fashioned God fearing porn, there is only wine made from raisins being fermented in toilets and a bunch of grown men showering together.
Now, I have had the toilet wine before, it has a robust ammonia aroma to it and a delightful fruity quality with just a hint of 2000 Flushes and a slight nuttiness that really gives it a bite, but make sure the bits of corn have been strained out before sipping the wine at a toilet wine tasting party.
But the big event in prison is the Dropping of the Soap, it's kind of like the Running of the Bulls but it happens just about every night instead of once a year.
Long story short, you do NOT want to be the one that drops the soap.
The first team to have the most players to drop the soap and come out of the showers unscathed, WINS!!!!
Yo Bort! Get off the toilet and sim this week already!!
Magic 8 Ball says: http://av.vet.ksu.edu/flash/8ball
Question: Will the [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF] beat the NBA Jam?
8 Ball's answer: As I see it, yes.
SA's Pick: NBA Jam
Magic 8 Ball Pick: [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF]
22/48 beers! – We have 22 beers to divide up amongst two good match ups this week, so figure it out yourself this week!
The Providence Radicals take on the Sparta battle chickens in a top 8 ranking battle!
And the NBA Jam tries to knock down the Hurf and Durf in the GOW!!
I think if GLB had a beer it would be called Punch to the Nuts Ale.
because not only does the excitement make you feel like you've been punched in the nuts, but all the flex you spend on the game will make you say "I spent how much on flex?! Somebody just punch me in the nuts!"
And then it does.
Let’s do this shit!!
Good luck to all the teams in the Alpha!
____________________________________________________________________________
****ZETA CONFERENCE POWER RANKINGS****
LW = Last Week Ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched
#1 Valhalla (9-0) LW1 - Another challenge of your supremacy awaits in the GOW!!
Next opponent: #4 Lincoln Navigators (7-2)
#2 So Cal BDC (8-1) LW2 - Cruise past the Prophecy and get ready for the last two troublesome teams on your schedule, Dakar and Valhalla.
It will be a tough two games, but the big show down with Valhalla could decide the new Zeta #1, if you don't fuck up the Dakar game first.
Next opponent: at #11 Mayan Prophecy (3-6)
#3 Minneapolis Masterminds (7-2) LW3 - You don't have to be a Mastermind to know how this one will end up. Uhm, a win, maybe?
Next opponent: at #16 Machu Picchu Hidden Dragons (0-9)
#4 Lincoln Navigators (7-2) LW4 - Time to navigate your way back to the GOW!
Next opponent: at #1 Valhalla (9-0)
#5 Moose Jaw Roughriders (6-3) LW6 - I just love going to a college town. There is always a party going on, the beer is cheap and there are plenty of chicks that will do anything to go to bed with a Pro Dotballer. So give your Moose Jaw a rest and let some drunken, loose college chick wear her jaw out on ya'.
Oh, and if you have time, don't forget to pick up the win.
Next opponent: at #13 College Town NWA Feeble Minds (2-7)
#6 Cincinnati Shockers (6-3) LW7 - Ok, this one is a big game. Beating Dakar will not only give you the edge on them for playoff rankings, it will not only put some distance between you and the rest of the pack, it will not only give you bragging rights, but a win in a big game like this can get you laid like a mofo!!!
Next opponent: at #7 Dakar Dragons (5-4)
#7 Dakar Dragons (5-4) LW5 - This one is big for you Dragons. A 10-6 record would definitely put you in line for a post season invite and with SoCal and Valhalla left to play, you can't afford to drop too many more games.
Next opponent: #6 Cincinnati Shockers (6-3)
#8 Porto Alegre Smugglers (5-4) LW8 - You guys have a pretty tough second half schedule and it just might be too much for you guys. There are still a couple opportunities for wins, but top get enough to get you an invitation to the post season jamboree will take some great fucking game planning.
Next opponent: at #9 Bonn Dynamo (5-4)
#9 Bonn Dynamo (5-4) LW9 - Don't screw this one up, it has playoff implications and if you have playoff aspirations get some inspiration and do some vindication then celebrate with elation................or some light masturbation.
Next opponent: #8 Porto Alegre Smugglers (5-4)
#10 Ministry of Dotball (3-6) LW10 - You guys may need to win ALL of your last 7 games to make the post season, but with Valhalla still to play in week 14 it could be a lost season.
Next opponent: #14 C-Town Hoodlums (1-8)
#11 Mayan Prophecy (3-6) LW11 - Well you guys have shots at 4 of your last games being wins for you, but that will give you only 7 wins on the season which won't be enough to make the playoffs.
Better game plan really well when facing Valhalla, Dakar and Socal. You will need to win 2 or all 3 of those games to make it.
Next opponent: #2 So Cal BDC (8-1)
#12 Sofia Spiders (2-7) LW12 - You guys will need to put in a little extra effort in the games ahead. You guys have the chance to run the table, but it won't come easy for a spider on it's last legs.
Next opponent: at #15 Korb Destroyers (1-8)
#13 College Town NWA Feeble Minds (2-7) LW13 - Ok College Town, school is O-U-W-T, OUWT!! It's time to watch the rest of the season from the cozy confines of a hot chick's booth. And no trying that college stunt to see how many will fit in her booth, you have to pay a little extra for that kind of action.
Thanks for playing.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2002/09samantha/Samantha-08.jpg
Next opponent: #5 Moose Jaw Roughriders (6-3)
#14 C-Town Hoodlums (1-8) LW14 - Well Hood, it is time or you guys to go knock on the doors to the Hot Chick Lounge. 8 losses with Valhalla and Dakar still on the schedule, I think the time has come to arrest the Hoodlums. Yep, I'll let the girls in the lounge use hand cuffs on you guys. Feel better?
Thanks for playing.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2002/09giovanna/Giovanna-12.jpg
Next opponent: at #10 Ministry of Dotball (3-6)
#15 Korb Destroyers (1-8) LW15 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2002/11beth/Beth-23.jpg
Next opponent: #12 Sofia Spiders (2-7)
#16 Machu Picchu Hidden Dragons (0-9) LW16 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2002/11catherine/Catherine-13.jpg
Next opponent: #3 Minneapolis Masterminds (7-2)
*****WEEK 10 ZETA CONFERENCE PREDICTIONS*****
Here's my prediction record week by week.
Week 1: 4-4 Week 2: 4-4 Week 3: 6-2 Week 4: 6-2 Week 5: 5-3 Week 6: 8-0 Week 7: 7-1 Week 8: 8-0 Week 9: 8-0
Overall: 56-16
SA’s GOW: 8-1
Magic 8 Ball’s GOW: 4-5
#4 Lincoln Navigators (7-2) at #1 Valhalla (9-0) = Valhalla
Game Rating: 6/6 beers
#6 Cincinnati Shockers (6-3) at #7 Dakar Dragons (5-4) = Cincinnati Shockers
Game Rating: 5/6 beers
#8 Porto Alegre Smugglers (5-4) at #9 Bonn Dynamo (5-4) = Bonn Dynamo
Game Rating: 5/6 beers
#2 So Cal BDC (8-1) at #11 Mayan Prophecy (3-6) = So Cal BDC
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#5 Moose Jaw Roughriders (6-3) at #13 College Town NWA Feeble Minds (2-7) = Moose Jaw Roughriders
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#14 C-Town Hoodlums (1-8) at #10 Ministry of Dotball (3-6) = Ministry of Dotball
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#12 Sofia Spiders (2-7) at #15 Korb Destroyers (1-8) = Sofia Spiders
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#3 Minneapolis Masterminds (7-2) at #16 Machu Picchu Hidden Dragons (0-9) = Minneapolis Masterminds
Game Rating: 1/6 beers
*Game Of The Week* (GOW)
#4 Lincoln Navigators (7-2) at #1 Valhalla (9-0) -
Holy shit balls!
Week after week the Sport's Page brings you the best GLB action that hard earned money can be wasted on!!
#4 vs #1!!!
The Lincoln Navigators are looking to unseat the still undefeated Valhalla!!
The Navigators can use, their 12 cup holders, the On-Star computer system and 4-wheel drive!
Valhalla can use Valkyries, Vikings and Volvo's!!!!
This week's GOW is brought to you by Tampax Tampons.
Wearing white shorts when your bleeding starts?
Then shove a Tampax Tampon up your lady parts.
Yo Bort! Put the Krispy Kreme down and let's get to some dotball action!!
Magic 8 Ball says: http://av.vet.ksu.edu/flash/8ball
Question: Will the Navigators beat the Valhalla?
8 Ball's answer: Very doubtful.
SA's Pick: Valhalla
Magic 8 Ball Pick: Valhalla
24/48 beers! – Are you ready for some exciting Zeta action? No? Ok, I'll wait.......................................................
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......................................................ready now?
OK here we go!!!
This week we have 3 excellent games to keep an eye on in Zeta.
First we have the Smugglers taking on the Dynamo in a battle for a top 8 spot!!
Then we have the Shockers battling the Dragons!! Both teams want to break into the top 4, but only one will move up!!
And in the GOW we have the #4 Lincoln Navigators going for the win against an undefeated Valhalla!!
Another week of great match
Three great Zeta match ups that will knock a bitch out so you can finally quit listening to her nag about how you spend more time and money on GLB than you do on her!!!!
Let’s do this shit!!
Good luck to all the teams in Zeta!
Some teams have stepped up and some have stepped off a cliff.
where has your team gone?
GLB is one big ass mystery...........................
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FysobubtDcI
A lot of crazy action happened last week, upset losses, surprising defeats and some teams just kept rolling on.
It just goes to show that some teams are stepping up to the challenge that is World League competition.
If you can't stand the heat, drink another Pina Colada and pass the fuck out!!
At least that's what my Uncle Morty used to say. He died, btw, from alcoholism and a severe sun burn.
Let's get to the action!!!!!!!
Even More New Hot Chick Lounge Members!!!
Well we had to do it. We had no choice but to put some new teams into the Lounge where they will be cared for and fed and sheltered by some of the sluttiest and trshiest women ever known to man, woman or a 12 inch vibrator. (God bless there little hearts)
So the new teams come to us from Zeta this week.
The College Town NWA Feeble Minds have flunked out of school and will be spending time with the Lounge cheer leading squad.
And the C-Town Hoodlums. They are usually the ones doin' the bitch slappin', but they will be the ones getting slapped by the girls in the HCL. It was their request and they did pay a little extra for that kind of action.
So see ya' guys next season and enjoy the booze, broads and the always free penicillin shots given out by students that almost passed the MCAT's. They might have passed had they not gone to College Town.
SA's Player of the Week
And the POW goes to.....................
Queen City kicker, Sebastian "Sea Bass" Janikowski! YAY!!
"Sea Bass" was a mad polish powder head in the 4th quarter of the game against Sparta last week. He traded off FG's back and forth with the Sparta kicker and sending it to OT where Janikowski kicked the game winner as well!
That's what I call moxie!
So here's to you, Sebastian "Sea Bass" Janikowski..............................
http://i378.photobucket.com/albums/oo227/jason41470/Warsteiner_4a9ec543d47f2.jpg
SALUTE!!!
An SA Fairy Tale.
When the three bears came home, they saw Goldilocks fast asleep in their bed.
They stripped off their clothes, popped a Viagra, looked at each other and said....................
..............................LET'S DO THIS SHIT!!!
...................true story, chuckle heads.
You may or may not agree with them, but this is how I see them.
****ALPHA CONFERENCE POWER RANKINGS****
LW = Last Week ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched
#1 Chocolate Blaze (9-0) LW1 - Welcome to double digit wins!!!! YAY!!!
Next opponent: at #13 Windhoek White Rhinos (2-7)
#2 Warsaw Wrath (8-1) LW2 - Well that loss just sucked. But you can take out some Wrath on some kids with Tourettes if you like.
Go ahead, kick them while they are down, it will make you feel better to beat up these goofy bastards.
Next opponent: #10 La Tourette Syndrome (4-5)
#3 East St Louis Tire Fires (7-2) LW3 - You guys could go take a nap and still get the win here. Congrats on win #8 and please remember to thank the Ghost Riders, maybe send them a nice fruit basket or a soft core porn.
Next opponent: at #15 Ghost Riders In The Sky (1-8)
#4 Indianapolis Gurupies (7-2) LW5 - Well it doesn't take a genius to know who the stud is on the O-line, it's LOT Bi curious.
he can play the right or the left side with ease and enjoys playing either side.
Yep, you guessed it, bi Curious goes both ways.
Next opponent: at #11 Honolulu Hurricane Wife Carriers (3-6)
#5 Providence Radicals (7-2) LW4 - You guys are 7-2, the Battle chickens are 5-4. You both are looking to keep winning, but only one will. You guys want to be the one that keeps on winning, right?
Then I guess it's time that you guys went and choked the chicken. (Ok, you guys knew I would have to use that reference sooner or later.)
Next opponent: at #9 Sparta Battle Chickens (5-4)
#6 [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF] (6-3) LW7 - G...........O............W............!
Next opponent: at #8 NBA Jam (5-4)
#7 Queen City Black Cats (6-3) LW8 - Man that was a close win! And after a nail biter like that, you guys probably need a................
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2RHTiXvELNg
...............VACATION!!!
Enjoy, fun, sun, fine dining and shopping!!!
There's nothing a bunch of queens like more than a day of shopping and acting like the Sex in the City girls.
Next opponent: at #16 Graz Grizzlies (0-9)
#8 NBA Jam (5-4) LW9 - Ooooh-weeee!! It's the GOW for you Jam'ers!!
Btw, great upset win over ESL, it couldn't have come at a better time.
Next opponent: #6 [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF] (6-3)
#9 Sparta Battle Chickens (5-4) LW6 - I am not going to lie to you Battle Chickens. You gots a tough road ahead of you and getting enough wins to make it to the playoffs will be difficult, some of you may not make it alive.
Actually, most of you may not make it alive.
In fact, none of you may make it back alive from this stretch of games.
You will ALL die.
Have fun.
Next opponent: #5 Providence Radicals (7-2)
#10 La Tourette Syndrome (4-5) LW11 - Congrats on that last win! I think it is all due to that CB duo of CJ Woodson and Franky4Fingers.
Franky used to be a prison guard at Leavenworth and lost six of his ten fingers in a tragic anal cavity search accident.
How he got six fingers in one ass, you got me.
CJ Woodson changed his name from BJ Woodson, I'll let your imaginations run wild to what BJ stood for.
Next opponent: at #2 Warsaw Wrath
#11 Honolulu Hurricane Wife Carriers (3-6) LW10 - After this next loss to the Gurupies, you guys could start tearing through the second half. Maybe 9 wins if you work at it, maybe a post season invite if you persevere, maybe a front row seat in the HCL if you suck.
Next opponent: #4 Indianapolis Gurupies (7-2)
#12 October Wildfire (2-7) LW14 - A certain somebody, I won't mention NiborRis' name, but he talked me into sparing the Wildfire from going into the Hot Chick Lounge, so far you guys are proving worth saving with a win, but can you keep it up is the real question.
Next opponent: at #14 Krungthep Garudas (2-7)
#13 Windhoek White Rhinos (2-7) LW12 - Blaze and Indy both up next equals loss 8 and loss 9, which equals an invite to the Lounge.
I think it's time.
Next opponent: #1 Chocolate Blaze (9-0)
#14 Krungthep Garudas (2-7) LW13 - Ok, here's the situation. You guys have the opportunity to make a big run at 8-8 if you can start AND maintain a win streak. Coincidentally, starting and maintaining is the problem I supposedly had according to the ex.......................you know what she is.
Next opponent: #12 October Wildfire (2-7)
#15 Ghost Riders In The Sky (1-8) LW15 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2002/07manda/Manda-22.jpg
Next opponent: #3 East St Louis Tire Fires (7-2)
#16 Graz Grizzlies (0-9) LW16 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2002/07michelle/Michelle-05.jpg
Next opponent: #7 Queen City Black Cats (6-3)
*****WEEK 10 ALPHA CONFERENCE PREDICTIONS*****
Here's my prediction record week by week.
Week 1: 7-1 Week 2: 6-2 Week 3: 6-2 Week 4: 7-1 Week 5: 5-3 Week 6: 6-2 Week 7: 7-1 Week 8: 7-1 Week 9: 5-3
Overall: 56-16
SA’s GOW: 8-1
Magic 8 Ball’s GOW: 4-5
#12 October Wildfire (2-7) at #14 Krungthep Garudas (2-7) = October Wildfire
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#7 Queen City Black Cats (6-3) at #16 Graz Grizzlies (0-9) = Queen City Black Cats
Game Rating: 1/6 beers
#6 [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF] (6-3) at #8 NBA Jam (5-4) = NBA Jam
Game Rating: /6 beers
#5 Providence Radicals (7-2) at #9 Sparta Battle Chickens (5-4) = Providence Radicals
Game Rating: 5/6 beers
#3 East St Louis Tire Fires (7-2) at #15 Ghost Riders In The Sky (1-8) = East St Louis Tire Fires
Game Rating: 1/6 beers
#4 Indianapolis Gurupies (7-2) at #11 Honolulu Hurricane Wife Carriers (3-6) = Indianapolis Gurupies
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#10 La Tourette Syndrome (4-5) at #2 Warsaw Wrath (8-1) = Warsaw Wrath
Game Rating: 3/6 beers
#1 Chocolate Blaze (9-0) at #13 Windhoek White Rhinos (2-7) = Chocolate Blaze
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
*Game Of The Week* (GOW)
#6 [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF] (6-3) at #8 NBA Jam (5-4) -
We have a GOW game that has post season implications written all over it!!!
Hurf and Durf and the NBA Jam both need this win to keep them ahead of the rest!
If I mixed a tablespoon of toughness with a teaspoon of roughness and stirred it into a gallon of GLBalls, then baked at 350 for 45 minutes and served them with care, you would get these two teams right here!!
There is only one way to settle this kind of match!
This one will be a "Who Dropped the Soap Match"!!!!
I don't think I really need to 'splain this one to yous guys, but I will anyways.
You see, in prison there are no video games, no watching DVD's in Hi-Def or Blue Ray, there is no web surfing for fine, upstanding, good old fashioned God fearing porn, there is only wine made from raisins being fermented in toilets and a bunch of grown men showering together.
Now, I have had the toilet wine before, it has a robust ammonia aroma to it and a delightful fruity quality with just a hint of 2000 Flushes and a slight nuttiness that really gives it a bite, but make sure the bits of corn have been strained out before sipping the wine at a toilet wine tasting party.
But the big event in prison is the Dropping of the Soap, it's kind of like the Running of the Bulls but it happens just about every night instead of once a year.
Long story short, you do NOT want to be the one that drops the soap.
The first team to have the most players to drop the soap and come out of the showers unscathed, WINS!!!!
Yo Bort! Get off the toilet and sim this week already!!
Magic 8 Ball says: http://av.vet.ksu.edu/flash/8ball
Question: Will the [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF] beat the NBA Jam?
8 Ball's answer: As I see it, yes.
SA's Pick: NBA Jam
Magic 8 Ball Pick: [HURF]ifax Explo[/DURF]
22/48 beers! – We have 22 beers to divide up amongst two good match ups this week, so figure it out yourself this week!
The Providence Radicals take on the Sparta battle chickens in a top 8 ranking battle!
And the NBA Jam tries to knock down the Hurf and Durf in the GOW!!
I think if GLB had a beer it would be called Punch to the Nuts Ale.
because not only does the excitement make you feel like you've been punched in the nuts, but all the flex you spend on the game will make you say "I spent how much on flex?! Somebody just punch me in the nuts!"
And then it does.
Let’s do this shit!!
Good luck to all the teams in the Alpha!
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****ZETA CONFERENCE POWER RANKINGS****
LW = Last Week Ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched
#1 Valhalla (9-0) LW1 - Another challenge of your supremacy awaits in the GOW!!
Next opponent: #4 Lincoln Navigators (7-2)
#2 So Cal BDC (8-1) LW2 - Cruise past the Prophecy and get ready for the last two troublesome teams on your schedule, Dakar and Valhalla.
It will be a tough two games, but the big show down with Valhalla could decide the new Zeta #1, if you don't fuck up the Dakar game first.
Next opponent: at #11 Mayan Prophecy (3-6)
#3 Minneapolis Masterminds (7-2) LW3 - You don't have to be a Mastermind to know how this one will end up. Uhm, a win, maybe?
Next opponent: at #16 Machu Picchu Hidden Dragons (0-9)
#4 Lincoln Navigators (7-2) LW4 - Time to navigate your way back to the GOW!
Next opponent: at #1 Valhalla (9-0)
#5 Moose Jaw Roughriders (6-3) LW6 - I just love going to a college town. There is always a party going on, the beer is cheap and there are plenty of chicks that will do anything to go to bed with a Pro Dotballer. So give your Moose Jaw a rest and let some drunken, loose college chick wear her jaw out on ya'.
Oh, and if you have time, don't forget to pick up the win.
Next opponent: at #13 College Town NWA Feeble Minds (2-7)
#6 Cincinnati Shockers (6-3) LW7 - Ok, this one is a big game. Beating Dakar will not only give you the edge on them for playoff rankings, it will not only put some distance between you and the rest of the pack, it will not only give you bragging rights, but a win in a big game like this can get you laid like a mofo!!!
Next opponent: at #7 Dakar Dragons (5-4)
#7 Dakar Dragons (5-4) LW5 - This one is big for you Dragons. A 10-6 record would definitely put you in line for a post season invite and with SoCal and Valhalla left to play, you can't afford to drop too many more games.
Next opponent: #6 Cincinnati Shockers (6-3)
#8 Porto Alegre Smugglers (5-4) LW8 - You guys have a pretty tough second half schedule and it just might be too much for you guys. There are still a couple opportunities for wins, but top get enough to get you an invitation to the post season jamboree will take some great fucking game planning.
Next opponent: at #9 Bonn Dynamo (5-4)
#9 Bonn Dynamo (5-4) LW9 - Don't screw this one up, it has playoff implications and if you have playoff aspirations get some inspiration and do some vindication then celebrate with elation................or some light masturbation.
Next opponent: #8 Porto Alegre Smugglers (5-4)
#10 Ministry of Dotball (3-6) LW10 - You guys may need to win ALL of your last 7 games to make the post season, but with Valhalla still to play in week 14 it could be a lost season.
Next opponent: #14 C-Town Hoodlums (1-8)
#11 Mayan Prophecy (3-6) LW11 - Well you guys have shots at 4 of your last games being wins for you, but that will give you only 7 wins on the season which won't be enough to make the playoffs.
Better game plan really well when facing Valhalla, Dakar and Socal. You will need to win 2 or all 3 of those games to make it.
Next opponent: #2 So Cal BDC (8-1)
#12 Sofia Spiders (2-7) LW12 - You guys will need to put in a little extra effort in the games ahead. You guys have the chance to run the table, but it won't come easy for a spider on it's last legs.
Next opponent: at #15 Korb Destroyers (1-8)
#13 College Town NWA Feeble Minds (2-7) LW13 - Ok College Town, school is O-U-W-T, OUWT!! It's time to watch the rest of the season from the cozy confines of a hot chick's booth. And no trying that college stunt to see how many will fit in her booth, you have to pay a little extra for that kind of action.
Thanks for playing.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2002/09samantha/Samantha-08.jpg
Next opponent: #5 Moose Jaw Roughriders (6-3)
#14 C-Town Hoodlums (1-8) LW14 - Well Hood, it is time or you guys to go knock on the doors to the Hot Chick Lounge. 8 losses with Valhalla and Dakar still on the schedule, I think the time has come to arrest the Hoodlums. Yep, I'll let the girls in the lounge use hand cuffs on you guys. Feel better?
Thanks for playing.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2002/09giovanna/Giovanna-12.jpg
Next opponent: at #10 Ministry of Dotball (3-6)
#15 Korb Destroyers (1-8) LW15 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2002/11beth/Beth-23.jpg
Next opponent: #12 Sofia Spiders (2-7)
#16 Machu Picchu Hidden Dragons (0-9) LW16 - Click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2002/11catherine/Catherine-13.jpg
Next opponent: #3 Minneapolis Masterminds (7-2)
*****WEEK 10 ZETA CONFERENCE PREDICTIONS*****
Here's my prediction record week by week.
Week 1: 4-4 Week 2: 4-4 Week 3: 6-2 Week 4: 6-2 Week 5: 5-3 Week 6: 8-0 Week 7: 7-1 Week 8: 8-0 Week 9: 8-0
Overall: 56-16
SA’s GOW: 8-1
Magic 8 Ball’s GOW: 4-5
#4 Lincoln Navigators (7-2) at #1 Valhalla (9-0) = Valhalla
Game Rating: 6/6 beers
#6 Cincinnati Shockers (6-3) at #7 Dakar Dragons (5-4) = Cincinnati Shockers
Game Rating: 5/6 beers
#8 Porto Alegre Smugglers (5-4) at #9 Bonn Dynamo (5-4) = Bonn Dynamo
Game Rating: 5/6 beers
#2 So Cal BDC (8-1) at #11 Mayan Prophecy (3-6) = So Cal BDC
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#5 Moose Jaw Roughriders (6-3) at #13 College Town NWA Feeble Minds (2-7) = Moose Jaw Roughriders
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#14 C-Town Hoodlums (1-8) at #10 Ministry of Dotball (3-6) = Ministry of Dotball
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#12 Sofia Spiders (2-7) at #15 Korb Destroyers (1-8) = Sofia Spiders
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#3 Minneapolis Masterminds (7-2) at #16 Machu Picchu Hidden Dragons (0-9) = Minneapolis Masterminds
Game Rating: 1/6 beers
*Game Of The Week* (GOW)
#4 Lincoln Navigators (7-2) at #1 Valhalla (9-0) -
Holy shit balls!
Week after week the Sport's Page brings you the best GLB action that hard earned money can be wasted on!!
#4 vs #1!!!
The Lincoln Navigators are looking to unseat the still undefeated Valhalla!!
The Navigators can use, their 12 cup holders, the On-Star computer system and 4-wheel drive!
Valhalla can use Valkyries, Vikings and Volvo's!!!!
This week's GOW is brought to you by Tampax Tampons.
Wearing white shorts when your bleeding starts?
Then shove a Tampax Tampon up your lady parts.
Yo Bort! Put the Krispy Kreme down and let's get to some dotball action!!
Magic 8 Ball says: http://av.vet.ksu.edu/flash/8ball
Question: Will the Navigators beat the Valhalla?
8 Ball's answer: Very doubtful.
SA's Pick: Valhalla
Magic 8 Ball Pick: Valhalla
24/48 beers! – Are you ready for some exciting Zeta action? No? Ok, I'll wait.......................................................
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......................................................ready now?
OK here we go!!!
This week we have 3 excellent games to keep an eye on in Zeta.
First we have the Smugglers taking on the Dynamo in a battle for a top 8 spot!!
Then we have the Shockers battling the Dragons!! Both teams want to break into the top 4, but only one will move up!!
And in the GOW we have the #4 Lincoln Navigators going for the win against an undefeated Valhalla!!
Another week of great match
Three great Zeta match ups that will knock a bitch out so you can finally quit listening to her nag about how you spend more time and money on GLB than you do on her!!!!
Let’s do this shit!!
Good luck to all the teams in Zeta!
Edited by Smiling Assasain on Apr 25, 2010 19:04:02
Edited by Smiling Assasain on Apr 25, 2010 16:50:55
Edited by Smiling Assasain on Apr 25, 2010 10:55:26
Edited by Smiling Assasain on Apr 25, 2010 10:50:08
Edited by Smiling Assasain on Apr 25, 2010 10:48:54
At least she reduced the value of the pic with her tears.
