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arcadecowboy
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And we start with the computer script rankings, based on "talent" alone. I'll pretend that these are 100% accurate if you will...

PRESEASON RANKINGS

Rnk ..... Off ..... Def .... SoS ........... W-L-T... Team
1.. ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Nairobi Death Squad
2.. ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Santa Ana Swine Flu
3.. ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 The Dead Presidents
3.. ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Blacc's Bastards
5.. ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Toro Nation
6.. ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Fulham Flying Hellfish
7.. ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Al Qahira Inferno
8.. ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Vereenging Zombie Monkeys
9.. ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Flashdancing Platypi
10 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Kenya Diggits
11 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Sterling Bulldawgs
12 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Mayotte Metal Militia
13 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Dogs of War
14 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Covington Black Knights
15 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 West Yorkshire Bandits
15 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Zimbabwe Rebels
17 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 San Antonio Venom
18 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Nile Crocodiles
19 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Colonial Zoners
19 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Nigerian Nightmares
21 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 P-Funk Allstars
22 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 BURUNDI BUCSH WARRIORS
23 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Barcelona Blaze
24 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Zimbabwe Bulls
25 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 West Nile Mosquitos
26 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Lyon Flames
27 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Longreach Wildcats
28 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Alexandria Crimson Evil Aces
29 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Hungry Hungry Hippos
30 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Patagonia Punishers
31 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Montreal Clown Suit Wearers
32 ........ 1 ........ 1 ........ NaN ........ 0-0--4 Algeria Dune Hoppers

thanks to gongadan for the work on the script
Edited by arcadecowboy on Apr 6, 2010 20:07:40
Edited by arcadecowboy on Apr 6, 2010 20:07:04
Edited by arcadecowboy on Apr 6, 2010 20:06:03
Edited by arcadecowboy on Apr 6, 2010 20:05:23
 
AZSEAfan
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Thanks for the effort AC. Will be interesting to see how things play out.

TDP should be about #8-10 though.
Edited by AZSEAfan on Apr 6, 2010 20:41:22
 
drezplace
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Thanks arcadecowboy for taking the time to post this. Now hopefully the Black Knight can make our way up the rankings.
 
babyowl
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23rd?!?!?!
 
arcadecowboy
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lol, week 14 is *really* circled on your calender now, isn't it?

! Blame the script !
 
drezplace
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I think some one is not happy
 
AZSEAfan
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Originally posted by babyowl
23rd?!?!?!


I think there might be a couple CPU teams ahead of the Blaze there
 
arcadecowboy
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Just this once, all of last year's AAA2 Elephants are in bold.

1. Santa Ana Swine Flu - Last week: Broke the scoreboard vs CPU Lyon Flames. The computer script's favorites. I keep wanting Santa Ana's team logo to be a flying pig. Next up: Dogs of War

2. The Dead Presidents - Last week: Broke the scoreboard vs Algeria Dune Hoppers. Most people's favorites. TDP flexed their muscles and admired themselves in the mirror while the fans ate it up like Tommy's chili cheese dogs. Next up: the Inferno

3. Blacc's Bastards - Last week: 41-14 over Colonial Zoners. A team I don't know had a solid victory over another team I don't know. Good enough to take the 3 spot. Next up: Vereeenging.

4. Al Qahira Inferno - Last week: 26-3 over West Yorkshire Bandits. Okay, I do know the West Yorkshire, and historically, they've been a good team. Well done, Inferno (pun intended). Next up: TDP

5. Flashdancing Platypi - Last week: 52-13 over Sterling Bulldawgs. Sterling was pretty good last season. I hear they may be fighting with decline this season. Decline might be harder to fight than flashdancing platypi. Next up: P-Funk Allstars

6. Toro Nation - Last week: 3-50 loss to Nairobi Death Squid. I think the Death Squid are pretty good. And I'm basing that on the fact I have never been to Nairobi, and a death squid sounds horrible. Horrible, horrible, horrible. ...I think I'm gonna go write a movie about it. Next up: Covington.

7. Vereeenging Zombie Monkeys - Last week: 0-128 loss to Kenya Diggits. The computer was pretty high on Vereeenging. So much so that I'm not gonna drop them much, despite the fact they got their diggits kenya'd. Why? Cuz they got attitude. Next up: Blacc's Bastards.

8. Mayotte Metal Militia - Last week: Broke the scoreboard vs the CPU Alexandria Crimson Evil Aces. A playoff team last season in an Elephant conference that was like a giant flaming blender from Hell. May be surfing the decline wave this season, trying to stay afloat. Well, probably more than stay afloat. They'll probably cause plenty of damage along the way. Next up: Barcelona.

9. Dogs of War - Last week: Broke the scoreboard vs the West Nile Mosquitos. One of the youngest teams in the conference last season, now hoping for their turn to bust some heads. Next up: Santa Ana Swine Flu.

10. Covington Black Knights - Last week: Broke the scoreboard vs the CPU Longreach Wildcats. Covington was poop-slapped with chemistry penalties last season. How they do this season depends on how their recruiting went. Imo a playoff team, but the computer thought otherwise. But the computer thought the same for the Dogs, so we'll see... Next up: Toro Nation.

11. Zimbabwe Rebels - Last week: 24-27 loss to the Fulham Flying Hellfish. I think Fulham might be good. Next up: San Antonio.

12. San Antonio Venom - Last week: Broke the scoreboard vs the Patagonia Punishers. A good start. Next up: Zimbabwe Rebels.

13. P-Funk Allstars - Last week: 36-0 over the BURUNDI Bucsh Warriors. Where would hip-hop be if folks like Snoop Dogg didn't have the P-Funk as a go-to for all their best ideas? Somebody say, "Is there funk after death?" I say, "Is Seven Up?" Next up: the Platypi.

14. Barcelona Blaze - Last week: Broke the scoreboard vs the Hungry Hungry Hippos. The Blaze have a chip on their shoulder that says "badass" and are looking to climb the rankings. But they're about to grab onto a razor sharp rung. Next up: Mayotte.

15. Nigerian Nightmares - Last week: 3-181 vs the Nile Crocodilios. Nigerian had a rough go last season, as one of the lowest avg leveled teams. We'll see if they aged well this off-season, but game one was not the start they'd want. If they want to demonstrate improvement and make a statement, next one's a do-or-die. Next up: Montreal.

16. Montreal Clown Suit Wearers - Last week: Broke the scoreboard vs the Zimbabwe Bulls. Kind of. It's a long walk from Montreal to Africa. But I'm sure the Clown Suits help. Next up: the Nightmares.
 
drezplace
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Great write up arcadecowboy. Yet the chemistry thing killed us last season, but hopefully (I do mean Hopfully) that will not be the case this season.
 
HANDSaLIVE
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Uhhh thanks for the number 1 spot. Hopefully my coordinators can keep it.
 
Balls Models
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any significance to the bolded font?

top 3 elephant look to me like (no order) presidents, inferno, platypi.

 
ecrana
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Great write-ups. Man does this conference look more competitive... GG to Flashdancing. Didn't know what to expect from you guys and it showed.
Edited by ecrana on Apr 9, 2010 13:52:19
 
immagonnawin
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Originally posted by ecrana
Great write-ups. Man does this conference look more competitive... GG to Flashdancing. Didn't know what to expect from you guys and it showed.


GG to you as well. Good luck from here on out.
 
arcadecowboy
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Originally posted by Balls Models
any significance to the bolded font?

top 3 elephant look to me like (no order) presidents, inferno, platypi.



just the "veteran" teams that were in AAA#2 Elephant last season.
 
arcadecowboy
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This copy and paste is probably going to be a format disaster, but interesting nonetheless, imo.

Ranking by avgerage effective level.

Rank Team Players Avg Level Avg Value Eff Level
1 Santa Ana Swine Flu 40 65 968.82 74
2 Covington Black Knights 46 69 941.33 73
3 Mayotte Metal Militia 52 68 932.8 73
4 Dogs of War 53 63 919.74 72
5 Flashdancing Platypi 48 59 916.32 72
6 San Antonio Venom 32 66 913.35 72
7 The Dead Presidents 55 63 912.02 72
8 Zimbabwe Rebels 55 62 909.08 71
9 Al Qahira Inferno 52 62 894.7 70
10 Barcelona Blaze 45 63 873.46 67
11 Toro Nation 48 59 863.66 66
12 Vereenging Zombie Monkeys 43 61 849.32 64
13 Nigerian Nightmares 46 59 846.82 64
14 Blacc's Bastards 50 55 838.96 63
15 P-Funk Allstars 48 56 834.79 62
16 Montreal Clown Suit Wearers 0 0 0 0
 
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