Warrior General Games

Welcome to Issue 3!! We made it!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MdLUx_F2FUA

That's right, it's another Issue of the Sport's Page! The only rankings and predictions worth reading on GLB!

So here we are at the third week of games in season 12.
We have got 7, 2-0 teams in the Zeta and three undefeated teams still left in Alpha.
And how about those GOW's?!
In Alpha, the Lumberjacks held the lead over the Freight Train at half time, but only to let them score 35 points in the second half to take home the win and keep their #1 ranking.
Over in Zeta, the Tunguska Meteors were leading the Bishops 34-20 in the 4th quarter with 12 1/2 minutes left on the clock and then the Bishops rolled off 21 straight points to win the game.
Great games guys!

So we just added in four more teams to the Hot Chick Lounge.
Why? They just had no chance of ever making the post season, so send these teams down.
The Tomsk Assassins and the Aachen Spartans enter the lounge in Alpha and the Secretville Offtopics and the Buffalo Range Roamers join them from Zeta.
Enjoy your time in the lounge, where you will have the best seats in the house to watch real teams play out the rest of the season and good luck in season 13.

So, will we have new #1 teams in the league this week?
Who will remain undefeated and which will get defeated?
How much wood can a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Don't even text me these questions, just read the Sport's Page and find out, chuckle heads!!

And if Megan Fox is reading this, please quit calling and stalking me. It was a one night stand, so get over it!


Hey you!!...........................LET'S DO THIS SHIT!!


You may or may not agree with them, but this is how I see them.

****ALPHA CONFERENCE POWER RANKINGS****

LW = Last Week ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched

#1 Ukraine Freight Train (2-0) LW1 - No talking, just fighting!
But I will throw this out there, you Freight Train’ers are 0-2 against the Funky Bunch in the regular season.
Uh-oh, I think the smack war has just been declared.
Good luck, Freight Train. It is an honor to play you guys once again.
Next opponent: at #2 Banja Luka Funky Bunch (2-0)

#2 Banja Luka Funky Bunch (2-0) LW2 - Just keep doing what has worked for you guys when you play the Freight Train………….cheat.
It’s a big battle here and you guys have never lost in the regular season to the Ukraine Toy Train.
Keep the whammy on them!
Good luck, Funky Bunch’ers.
Next opponent: #1 Ukraine Freight Train (2-0)

#3 Odessa Outrage (2-0) LW4 - The Aachen Spartans are next?
I’m going back to bed…….Zzzzzzzzzzzz………..
Next opponent: at #15 Aachen Spartans (0-2)

#4 Lithuanian Lumberjacks (1-1) LW3 - Well it looks like the Freight Train ended up steam rolling you guys , 55-33. It was a great effort though. So wipe those tears away real quick, because the Vikings are coming to town and it should be another tough game.
But never fear, SA is here! And with me I bring a fight song just for you Lumberjacks to get you guys all fired up for your next game…………
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5zey8567bcg
Next opponent: #10 Vestfold Vikings (1-1)

#5 The Gods (1-1) LW7 - How do those tiger skin toga’s feel? I’ll bet they keep you guys warm and snug on a chilly October night. Well done getting the first win of season 12.
And now you guys get to go to the House of Pain for a shot at win #2.
I remember a massage parlor in Hong Kong called the House of Pain, never ask for a happy ending there.
Next opponent: at #12 House Of Pain (0-2)

#6 Excellence Express X Factor (1-1) LW8 - Well that big win over Furious George should lift some spirits on the X Factor and just in time too. A big five game stretch against 60+ rated teams lies ahead and you guys will need to get these wins early to keep yourselves in the top half of the conference.
Next opponent: #8 Sparta Baby Chickens (1-1)

#7 Cincinnati Tigers (1-1) LW5 - Ouch! The Gods skinned you Tigers pretty good, but at least the next game against the Devil Bats gives you guys a nice day or two to lick your wounds and get ready for the Freight Train in week 4.
Next opponent: at #16 Deimon Devil Bats (0-2)

#8 Sparta Baby Chickens (1-1) LW10 – These are some deadly Baby Chickens. They pecked the Sharpshooters into a 50-6 win and now comes a big test in the X Factor.
The first rule of the Sparta Baby Chickens is that you never speak of the Sparta Baby Chickens…………..that just doesn’t work, does it.
Next opponent: at #6 Excellence Express X Factor (1-1)

#9 Tallinn Nightmare (1-1) LW11 - 255-0? Wow, you guys really scared the bajeezus out of the Spartans. But those Spartans are nothing like the 300 Spartans that stood up to Xerxes and his million man march.
I think they are more like these Spartans……….
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LuNDkxVTGSk
Up next are the Sharpshooters, so this could be a really good chance of getting a second win.
Next opponent: at #13 West Charleville Sharpshooters (0-2)

#10 Vestfold Vikings (1-1) LW13 - Great win, Vikings! You got in your longboats and raped, pillaged and plundered your way to a 182-0 win over the Tomsk Assassins, nicely done.
But wait just a minute, raping, pillaging and plundering the Assassins is more like raiding a pre-school. It’s time for a much bigger test. Up next are the Lithuanian Lumberjacks and these burly, beard wearing, axe swinging bastards don’t take raping, pillaging and plundering lightly.
Next opponent: at #4 Lithuanian Lumberjacks (1-1)

#11 Furious George (1-1) LW6 - CPU moves down. Way down.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/10Seanna/Seanna-32.jpg
Next opponent: at #14 Tomsk Assassins (0-2)

#12 House Of Pain (0-2) LW9 - So far the HOP has scored only 6 points in their first two games. You guys aren’t living up to your names yet. Maybe you guys should change your name from the House of Pain to the House of Happy Endings.
Next opponent: #5 The Gods (1-1)

#13 West Charleville Sharpshooters (0-2) LW12 - The Sharpshooters went chicken hunting and they were the ones that got shot, plucked and stuffed. A 50-6 loss puts them at 0-2 and the next 4 games are against teams rated at 60 or better. You guys really need to get some wins in this stretch or the season could be over before the half way mark.
Next opponent: #9 Tallinn Nightmare (1-1)

#14 Tomsk Assassins (0-2) LW14 - Unless by some miracle they get a complete, high level roster, these guys have earned entrance into the Hot Chick Lounge.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/02Athena/Athena-12.jpg
Next opponent: #11 Furious George (1-1)

#15 Aachen Spartans (0-2) LW15 - It was inevitable that these guys would end up in the Hot Chick Lounge.
Enjoy your stay.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/02Taya/Taya-05.jpg
Next opponent: #3 Odessa Outrage (2-0)

#16 Deimon Devil Bats (0-2) LW16 - CPU? Just click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/07Chanel/Chanel-16.jpg
Next opponent: #7 Cincinnati Tigers (1-1)


*****WEEK 3 ALPHA CONFERENCE PREDICTIONS*****

So I’ll keep track of my predictions week by week just to see if I am any dam good. In the Game of the Week's (GOW) I'll go up against my old pal, the On Line Magic 8 Ball http://av.vet.ksu.edu/flash/8ball/
Yes, I really do consult an On Line Magic 8 Ball.

Here's my prediction record week by week.

Week 1: 6-2 Week 2: 8-0

Overall: 14-2
SA’s GOW: 1-1
Magic 8 Ball’s GOW: 1-1


#9 Tallinn Nightmare (1-1) at #13 West Charleville Sharpshooters (0-2) = Tallinn Nightmare – Sharpshooters appear to be cross eyed. I’m taking the Nightmare.
Game Rating: 3/6 beers

#8 Sparta Baby Chickens (1-1) at #6 Excellence Express X Factor (1-1) = Excellence Express X Factor – The EEXF will be like KFC in this game.
Game Rating: 4/6 beers

#5 The Gods (1-1) at #12 House Of Pain (0-2) = The Gods – The Gods go to 2-1 after this one.
Game Rating: 3/6 beers

#10 Vestfold Vikings (1-1) at #4 Lithuanian Lumberjacks (1-1) = Lithuanian Lumberjacks – Tough match up, but I think the Lumberjacks will come out on top in this one.
Game Rating: 5/6 beers

#3 Odessa Outrage (2-0) at #15 Aachen Spartans (0-2) = Odessa Outrage – Odessa still undefeated.
Game Rating: 1/6 beers

#11 Furious George (1-1) at #14 Tomsk Assassins (0-2) = Tomsk Assassins – Does anyone really care?
Game Rating: 2/6 beers

#7 Cincinnati Tigers (1-1) at #16 Deimon Devil Bats (0-2) = Cincinnati Tigers – Like there is really a choice here.
Game Rating: 1/6 beers

#1 Ukraine Freight Train (2-0) at #2 Banja Luka Funky Bunch (2-0) = Banja Luka Funky Bunch – I gotta’ stay with the home team or Chad and BigNath will make me re-live my days in prison………..in the showers.
Game Rating: 6/6 beers


*Game Of The Week* (GOW)
#1 Ukraine Freight Train (2-0) at #2 Banja Luka Funky Bunch (2-0) -
Great match up in the 3rd week of play! #1 vs #2!
These two teams have history……..
Season 7: Banja Luka – 49, Ukraine – 21
Season 9: Banja Luka – 41, Ukraine – 13
Scrim Season 10: Banja Luka – 45, Ukraine – 31
Scrim Season 11: Ukraine – 69, Banja Luka – 14
Funky Bunch holds the 3-1 lead over the Freight Train.
This one is supposed to be a battle for the #1 spot, but I say………it’s a Grudge Match, baby!
There is only one way legal to settle this score………………DANCE OFF!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qkj2HhFxPUU
Magic 8 Ball says: http://av.vet.ksu.edu/flash/8ball
Question: Will the Freight Train beat the Funky Bunch?
8 Ball's answer: Don’t count on it
SA's Pick: Banja Luka Funky Bunch
Magic 8 Ball Pick: Banja Luka Funky Bunch


23/48 beers! – Holy crap! We have 4 games that are worth popping open a beer or two over.
First we have the #9 Nightmares up against the #13 Sharpshooters!
Second, the #8 Baby Chickens are looking to best the #6 X Factor!
Third, we have the #10 Vestfold Vikings in a fight to the death with the #4 Lithuanian Lumberjacks!
And fourth, it is the battle of the week with the #2 Banja Luka Funky Bunch slugging it out with the #1 Ukraine Freight Train!
I think we will need to make an extra beer run or two for this week’s match up’s!
What a way to start of the Saturday with GLB action and a case of beer to drink.
Sounds like my morning, every morning.


Let’s do this shit!!

Good luck to all the Alpha teams in week 3!

____________________________________________________________________________


****ZETA CONFERENCE POWER RANKINGS****

LW = Last Week Ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched

#1 Warsaw War Gods (2-0) LW1 - Two big wins over two good teams means that you War Gods have earned yourselves a little R&R.
So we are sending you on an all expense paid trip to Secretville!
You don’t even need to play the game, just show up and you get a day of rest plus a win.
Next opponent: at #14 Secretville Offtopics (0-2)

#2 Kentucky Bootleggers (2-0) LW2 - You guys almost let that last game slip away. Next time try not drinking your own shine before the game is over. I think most of the Bootleggers were puking on the sidelines when the 4th quarter started.
That’s good homemade booze, but you really pay for it later.
http://i378.photobucket.com/albums/oo227/jason41470/707-night-at-lavatories.jpg
Next opponent: at #11 Mombasa Wombats (1-1)

#3 Vatican City Bishops (2-0) LW3 - Woah! That was a close game! The Meteors somehow let you guys roll off 21 straight points in the 4th to take that one. Looks like those blessings and prayers must have worked because the Lord let you guys pull off a miracle.
You probably won’t need them for the next game against the Pangs though.
Next opponent: at #12 Hungary Pangs (0-2)

#4 Serbia Swarm (2-0) LW4 - Another Zeta team at 2-0. How many of you guys are there?!
But up next it’s 2-0 vs 2-0. The Berlin Vikings are waiting in………Berlin. What they are doing in Berlin, they only know. Prolly raping, pillaging and plundering some German beer maidens……..
http://i14.ebayimg.com/04/i/000/e8/6c/edee_10.JPG
Next opponent: at #7 Berlin Vikings (2-0)

#5 Border Reivers (2-0) LW5 - After two strong wins to start season 12, the Reivers get a day of rest with the Springfield Meltdowns.
So enjoy your one day holiday………….
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fcwIEupH7UU
Next opponent: at #16 Springfield Meltdowns (0-2)

#6 Kaunas Archangels (2-0) LW8 - Here is your first real test of the season. The Beograd Black Hand come to town to see just how good you guys really are. The first two games were against cupcakes, but now we’ll see what you can do against a good team.
Just don’t let the Black Hand smack you around, they usually leave a mark………….
http://i378.photobucket.com/albums/oo227/jason41470/ass-with-handprints-on-it.jpg
Next opponent: #8 Beograd Black Hand (1-1)

#7 Berlin Vikings (2-0) LW10 - Two wins in two games is the way to start the season off. The Bombers were the latest victim of these Vikings. But the Serbia Swarm are coming to town after winning both of their first two games.
Pick up a couple cans and use generously in this game……………
http://www.overstockdrugstore.com/product_images/z/046500016721.jpg
Next opponent: #4 Serbia Swarm (2-0)

#8 Beograd Black Hand (1-1) LW6 - Aw man! What a great game that was!
The Bootleggers were real lucky to escape Beograd with that win. It was a great try fellas’.
But let’s get over the loss quick because that was only the first of six straight tough games.
The Archangels are up next and we need to give them the Black Hand backhand slap!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j2seiHua3Fc
Next opponent: at #6 Kaunas Archangels (2-0)

#9 Bratislava Zabijaks (1-1) LW7 - Well they aren’t pigs, but you can still kill the Range Roamers like they were pigs.
Have fun, Zabijacks.
Next opponent: #13 Buffalo Range Roamers (0-2)

#10 Tunguska Meteors (1-1) LW9 - The last time a meteor got bombed it was by Sir Bruce Willis in Armageddon. But these Bombers aren’t as rough and tough as Bruce Willis. They are more cute and cuddly, like Bruce Vilanch.
http://cm1.theinsider.com/media/0/367/51/L68e9n3Nctg9AfsaJHgM.0.0.0x0.400x477.jpeg
Enjoy the win.
Next opponent: #15 New Jersey Bombers (0-2)

#11 Mombasa Wombats (1-1) LW11 - Well back to work, Wombats. The Roamers gave you a win and a nice breather, but now the Bootleggers are here and ready to distribute a loss with their fine brand of bath tub brew.
Don’t drink it without straining it first.
Next opponent: #2 Kentucky Bootleggers (2-0)

#12 Hungary Pangs (0-2) LW12 - Oooohh, it’s not looking good right now. The Bishops are up next and you guys have yet to win a game.
Looks like it’s 0-3 until next week.
Next opponent: #3 Vatican City Bishops (2-0)

#13 Buffalo Range Roamers (0-2) LW13 - Sorry Roamers, but it’s time to send you to the Lounge.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/04Teresa/Teresa-43.jpg
Next opponent: at #9 Bratislava Zabijaks (1-1)

#14 Secretville Offtopics (0-2) LW14 - Enjoy the Hot Chick Lounge.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/06Teresa/Teresa-27.jpg
Next opponent: #1 Warsaw War Gods (2-0)

#15 New Jersey Bombers (0-2) LW15 - Bombers still getting bombed.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/11Jamie/Jamie-16.jpg
Next opponent: at #10 Tunguska Meteors (1-1)

#16 Springfield Meltdowns (0-2) LW16 - No comment, just click the pic.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2006/08Whitney/Whitney-36.jpg
Next opponent: #5 Border Reivers (2-0)


*****WEEK 3 ZETA CONFERENCE PREDICTIONS*****

Here's my Zeta prediction record week by week.

Week 1: 7-1 Week 2: 6-2

Overall: 13-3
SA’s GOW: 0-2
Magic 8 Ball’s GOW: 1-1


#4 Serbia Swarm (2-0) at #7 Berlin Vikings (2-0) = Serbia Swarm - Close match up, but the Swarm should prevail.
Game Rating: 6/6 beers

#8 Beograd Black Hand (1-1) at #6 Kaunas Archangels (2-0) = Beograd Black Hand - the Black Hand should rebound and take this one.
Game Rating: 5/6 beers

#2 Kentucky Bootleggers (2-0) at #11 Mombasa Wombats (1-1) = Kentucky Bootleggers – Bootleggers get their 3rd win.
Game Rating: 5/6 beers

#3 Vatican City Bishops (2-0) at #12 Hungary Pangs (0-2) = Vatican City Bishops – Bishops go to 3-0.
Game Rating: 2/6 beers

#1 Warsaw War Gods (2-0) at #14 Secretville Offtopics (0-2) = Warsaw War Gods – Are you serious? Do I really need to pick the winner?
Game Rating: 2/6 beers

#13 Buffalo Range Roamers (0-2) at #9 Bratislava Zabijaks (1-1) = Bratislava Zabijaks – Pretty obvios who will win this one.
Game Rating: 2/6 beers

#15 New Jersey Bombers (0-2) at #10 Tunguska Meteors (1-1) = Tunguska Meteors – Meteors get back on the winning track.
Game Rating: 1/6 beers

#5 Border Reivers (2-0) at #16 Springfield Meltdowns (0-2) = Border Reivers – Welcome to 3-0, Reivers.
Game Rating: 1/6 beers


*Game Of The Week* (GOW)
#4 Serbia Swarm (2-0) at #7 Berlin Vikings (2-0) -
We have two, 2-0 teams facing off against each other in the GOW this week!
The Berlin Vikings take on the Serbia Swarm!
There will be raiding and stinging and buzzing and burning, everything a football game needs to make it a great one!
The winner pulls away from the log jam of 2-0 teams in Zeta.
The loser just gets his log jammed!
Let’s get this sim started already!!
Magic 8 Ball says: http://av.vet.ksu.edu/flash/8ball
Question: Will the Swarm beat the Vikings?
8 Ball's answer: Most Likely
SA's Pick: Serbia Swarm
Magic 8 Ball Pick: Serbia Swarm


24/48 beers! – Alright you chuckle heads! We have three games that are beer worthy this time around!
We have the Beograd Black Hand battling it out with the Kaunas Archangels!
The Kentucky Bootleggers fighting the Mombasa Wombats!
And the Serbia Swarm will be challenging the Berlin Vikings in the GOW!
No it’s not your birthday. No it’s not Christmas. And no it is not Hanukkah.
It’s just one more exciting week of GLB fun at it’s best, so drink up and enjoy the games!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UPJFS26gckk

Let’s do this shit!!


Good luck to all the Zeta teams in week 3!

haha, time to prove you wrong!

all i know is ukraine finally gets a break after this game, we had a hell of a schedule to start with.

thanks again for doing this sa!

The Vatican Agrees with you assessment.

Good work my son

looking to make it 4-1 over you Freight Train'ers!
Good luck Numone


great job SA!

Great job SA, nice write-up

Good write-up, again. Our PR GM is useless. He just trolls with his other lame ass team.

SA...you are the best!

Awesome stuff. Thanks

Originally posted by tlsmith
Good write-up, again. Our PR GM is useless. He just trolls with his other lame ass team.

Mike?

But seriously, I appreciate you doing these. Probably wouldn't be much of a reason for me to keep coming here otherwise. But if we lose this game, I'll be shocked.

Ha, they have Train's in prison too!

Nice work as always.

Originally posted by GMathiasf
Mike?

But seriously, I appreciate you doing these. Probably wouldn't be much of a reason for me to keep coming here otherwise. But if we lose this game, I'll be shocked.

Remember when he was on the 21st Century Dreadnaught and he actually implored himself to post every other day with intelligent information? Those were the days.

Originally posted by SAVAGE OPS
Ha, they have Train's in prison too!


yes..................I know.

Originally posted by GMathiasf
Mike?

But seriously, I appreciate you doing these. Probably wouldn't be much of a reason for me to keep coming here otherwise. But if we lose this game, it will be tlsmith's fault.

fyp, as well.

Originally posted by GMathiasf
Mike?

But seriously, I appreciate you doing these. Probably wouldn't be much of a reason for me to keep coming here otherwise. But if we lose this game, I'll be shocked.

that was a tough game to pick, but I went with Beograd because I'm a little more familiar with the team.
But you guys could very well win it. Should be a good one though. Good luck to you guys.