WARNING: This is for entertainment purposes only. If you plan on getting your panties in a bunch, please don't waste your time in reading it.
PTI - OPL Edition [Season 9 Kick Off Special]
Michael Wilbon: Pardon the interruption but I'm Michael Wilbon. Tony, star FB Mike Ock says he's having trouble getting the ladies; you have any advice for him?
Tony Kornheiser: I'm Tony Kornheiser and yes, the good ones like to be paid up front!
Michael Wilbon: Not those kinds of ladies, you dope!
Tony Kornheiser: Oh... I can't imagine what other ones you'd be talking about.
Michael Wilbon: Welcome to PTI boys and girls, in todays episode we talk about the Season that was Season 9, LaShontell McFumbles, the meat grinder that is Zeta, and the Magellan Cup heats up.
Michael Wilbon: But we begin today with the news that WSI and OPL are no more.
Michael Wilbon: Tony, you said before they were the pride and joy of OPL, what do you have to say about them now?
Tony Kornheiser: I take it all back.
Michael Wilbon: That fast huh?
Tony Kornheiser: Yeah and let me tell you why. I was infatuated with the fact they were making this league shine.
Tony Kornheiser: I ignored the fact that they wern't even a true Oceania team in the first place.
Michael Wilbon: While that is true, you have to think it does get boring beating up on scrubs season after season.
Tony Kornheiser: I say good riddance. We should have seen this coming.
Michael Wilbon: They will be missed.
Tony Kornheiser: As they're getting thumped in USAPL.
Tony Kornheiser: Moving on to Season that was Season 9. The meat ginder that is Zeta has a new head hancho, WSI walked away with another championship and guts, guts and more guts. Michael, what if anything was most memorable about Season 9?
Michael Wilbon: It was a great Season Tony. I love watching these Zeta conference battles, you just don't know how its going to turn out. There is no clear favorite and the battles continue late into the season.
Tony Kornheiser: Yeah VooDoo has become pretty darn impressive.
Michael Wilbon: You can say that again. I had them winning it all.
Tony Kornheiser: I did to, especially after that shellacking they served up on Osaka. 62-0 good lord that was painful to watch.
Michael Wilbon: Yeah and with WSI gone, that Trophy is definitely on Zeta's radar.
Tony Kornheiser: Oh Zeta will win it, its just a matter of who.
Michael Wilbon: I wouldn't go that far.
Michael Wilbon: Speaking of Zeta, its become quite obvious that this division has become quite top heavy.
Michael Wilbon: Tony with all the restructuring going on, do you think it would be logical to maybe even the playing field amongst both conferences.
Tony Kornheiser: No.
Michael Wilbon: Why not.
Tony Kornheiser: Because thats sucking the fun out of it. We're just a few Seasons away from our AAA show where we were complaining how these blow outs are borning.
Tony Kornheiser: Now we have one of the most competitive conferences in all of GLB and we want to ruin it.
Michael Wilbon: I agree with you there, but do you think its unfair when teams with 11 wins are being snubbed in Zeta while teams barely above .500 are making it in Alpha?
Tony Kornheiser: They'll get better, they always do. Who knows, in two seasons we might be talking about how Alpha is the meat grinder.
Michael Wilbon: That's true I guess...
Michael Wilbon: Moving on to your boy Tony. LaShontell McJackson, or should I say LaShontell McFumbles.
Michael Wilbon: Tony your boy is gone, off to the SAPL. You going to miss him?
Tony Kornheiser: You know I love me some LaShontell.
Michael Wilbon: Yeah your slupage was pathetic.
Tony Kornheiser: But he has to be one of the most epic failures to ever grace OPL.
Michael Wilbon: Wow, comin down hard on your boy.
Tony Kornheiser: I mean i'd understand him being 3rd in the depth chart and not getting many plays...
Tony Kornheiser: But when he does he stinks up the joint??
Michael Wilbon: Yeah alot a talk for a guy who can't even hold onto the ball.
Tony Kornheiser: I hear he's already fumbling it up in SAPL.
Michael Wilbon: Maybe less yapping and more carrying...
Tony Kornheiser: Something like that.
Tony Kornheiser: Well its time for the game where I am always 100% correct.
Tony Kornheiser: Odds Makers with your metrosexual host, Tony Reali.
Tony Reali: Greetings gentleman, first touch up on something you've already discussed...
Tony Reali: What are the odds Zeta wins this years championship?
Michael Wilbon: Well over the last handful of years its been Alphas cup with a few spurts of Zeta.
Michael Wilbon: In a championship game you have the best of the best, who's to say Alpha's best isnt as good as Zeta's representative?
Tony Kornheiser: ME! This wasnt Alpha's cup as much as it was WSI's cup. WSI is gone!
Tony Kornheiser: I said it once and i'll say it again, Alpha has no chance. Its Zeta's turn and they're licking their chops! 100%
Michael Wilbon: That's too extreme for me...
Tony Kornheiser: You're going to play it safe like always.
Michael Wilbon: No. I play it smart. Its 1 game, either team could win. Alpha has a 50% chance of winning just like Zeta has a 50% chance.
Tony Kornheiser: Thats weak!
Tony Reali: Tony already making guarantees, get the crow ready.
Tony Reali: Next, the odds VooDoo repeats as the 1st seed?
Tony Kornheiser: VooDoo is a really good squad.
Michael Wilbon: Very solid.
Tony Kornheiser: But Zeta has a crop of solid clubs including some impressive new comers.
Michael Wilbon: This is true.
Tony Kornheiser: I still think they're the team to beat and give them the slight edge over the rest of the pack. 35%
Michael Wilbon: Im with you on this one Tony. Until you're removed from the top you're still the favorite. 30%.
Tony Reali: That one was a bit friendlier.
Tony Reali: Next up, the odds Denver LastDinosaur keeps his MVP crown?
Michael Wilbon: Big ups to Denver for continuing to dominate the OPL.
Tony Kornheiser: This guys a monster. I feel like today is repeat myself day, but i'll say it again.
Tony Kornheiser: Denver is the best defensive player to ever play in OPL.
Michael Wilbon: Ohhh, bringing up the ol' Denver vs. Avalanche debate huh?
Tony Kornheiser: Im not bringing it up, im killing it once and for all!
Tony Kornheiser: One of these two guys currently holds a Defensive MVP trophy and one doesnt.
Michael Wilbon: Avalanche didn't get one?
Tony Kornheiser: NOPE! Denvers still eating sacks for breakfast and Avalanche has all but disappeared into the mist of USAPL.
Tony Kornheiser: Denver is the NEW pride and joy of OPL, and no one will see this crown until he retires! 100%
Michael Wilbon: While I agree Denver will be a tough cookie to outperform, I do believe there are possibilities of teams gutting and people having outrageous performances.
Tony Kornheiser: So what are you saying?
Michael Wilbon: Im saying because of stat padding against guts there is a slight possibility someone leap frogs Denver.
Michael Wilbon: Im still staying high on this one though, 85%.
Tony Reali: There's the Tony we all know. A confident man today are we?
Tony Reali: Lastly, what are the chances our old friend Pagan Fire Eaters make the playoffs?
Tony Kornheiser: They catch a break because they're in Alpha.
Tony Kornheiser: If they were in Zeta I would say not a chance.
Tony Kornheiser: But I could see them slipping into 6th or 7th seed. I say 25%
Michael Wilbon: Yeah me too. Its fun to see them finally up here. We all knew they'd get here someday.
Michael Wilbon: Imma go a bit higher and say 35%. They're a good little team.
Michael Wilbon: Stat boy who's the winner?
Tony Reali: You can never pass up on a guarantee.
Tony Reali: And Mr. Kornheiser has dished out not 1 but 2 guarantees today. Check one for Zeta and one for Denver and one for Kornheiser as today's winner.
Michael Wilbon: That's game is rigged!
Tony Kornheiser: This game is 100% over!
Tony Kornheiser: 1 minute left lets go to big finish.
Michael Wilbon: Let's do it.
Tony Kornheiser: The Megellian Cup heats up with lots of smack talk coming from SAPL. Wilbon your thoughts?
Michael Wilbon: They need to shut their traps until they can actually win one or two.
Michael Wilbon: Osaka has left OPL to slup up the dunces in SAPL. Tony you kind of liked these guys right?
Tony Kornheiser: Yeah but they belong in a league that's all talk and nothing more.
Tony Kornheiser: Wibon the new BDC video is out on http://www.socalbdc.com you had a chance to look at it?
Michael Wilbon: Yeah it was HILARIOUS!
Michael Wilbon: Tony, we're hearing alot of confidence coming from the PMD camp. Think they can hang out alot longer then 1 season this time?
Tony Kornheiser: Hopefully, that last run was pathetic.
Tony Kornheiser: Guam Tigers guarantee of a 20-0 season fell short about 17 wins.
Michael Wilbon: We knew they didn't have a shot...
*HORN*
Michael Wilbon: That's the horn, we'll try and do better the next time.
Michael Wilbon: I'm Michael Wilbon.
Tony Kornheiser: And i'm Tony Kornheiser.
Michael Wilbon: Same time tomorrow knuckleheads.
Tony Kornheiser: Goodnight Canada!
PTI - OPL Edition [Season 9 Kick Off Special]
Michael Wilbon: Pardon the interruption but I'm Michael Wilbon. Tony, star FB Mike Ock says he's having trouble getting the ladies; you have any advice for him?
Tony Kornheiser: I'm Tony Kornheiser and yes, the good ones like to be paid up front!
Michael Wilbon: Not those kinds of ladies, you dope!
Tony Kornheiser: Oh... I can't imagine what other ones you'd be talking about.
Michael Wilbon: Welcome to PTI boys and girls, in todays episode we talk about the Season that was Season 9, LaShontell McFumbles, the meat grinder that is Zeta, and the Magellan Cup heats up.
Michael Wilbon: But we begin today with the news that WSI and OPL are no more.
Michael Wilbon: Tony, you said before they were the pride and joy of OPL, what do you have to say about them now?
Tony Kornheiser: I take it all back.
Michael Wilbon: That fast huh?
Tony Kornheiser: Yeah and let me tell you why. I was infatuated with the fact they were making this league shine.
Tony Kornheiser: I ignored the fact that they wern't even a true Oceania team in the first place.
Michael Wilbon: While that is true, you have to think it does get boring beating up on scrubs season after season.
Tony Kornheiser: I say good riddance. We should have seen this coming.
Michael Wilbon: They will be missed.
Tony Kornheiser: As they're getting thumped in USAPL.
Tony Kornheiser: Moving on to Season that was Season 9. The meat ginder that is Zeta has a new head hancho, WSI walked away with another championship and guts, guts and more guts. Michael, what if anything was most memorable about Season 9?
Michael Wilbon: It was a great Season Tony. I love watching these Zeta conference battles, you just don't know how its going to turn out. There is no clear favorite and the battles continue late into the season.
Tony Kornheiser: Yeah VooDoo has become pretty darn impressive.
Michael Wilbon: You can say that again. I had them winning it all.
Tony Kornheiser: I did to, especially after that shellacking they served up on Osaka. 62-0 good lord that was painful to watch.
Michael Wilbon: Yeah and with WSI gone, that Trophy is definitely on Zeta's radar.
Tony Kornheiser: Oh Zeta will win it, its just a matter of who.
Michael Wilbon: I wouldn't go that far.
Michael Wilbon: Speaking of Zeta, its become quite obvious that this division has become quite top heavy.
Michael Wilbon: Tony with all the restructuring going on, do you think it would be logical to maybe even the playing field amongst both conferences.
Tony Kornheiser: No.
Michael Wilbon: Why not.
Tony Kornheiser: Because thats sucking the fun out of it. We're just a few Seasons away from our AAA show where we were complaining how these blow outs are borning.
Tony Kornheiser: Now we have one of the most competitive conferences in all of GLB and we want to ruin it.
Michael Wilbon: I agree with you there, but do you think its unfair when teams with 11 wins are being snubbed in Zeta while teams barely above .500 are making it in Alpha?
Tony Kornheiser: They'll get better, they always do. Who knows, in two seasons we might be talking about how Alpha is the meat grinder.
Michael Wilbon: That's true I guess...
Michael Wilbon: Moving on to your boy Tony. LaShontell McJackson, or should I say LaShontell McFumbles.
Michael Wilbon: Tony your boy is gone, off to the SAPL. You going to miss him?
Tony Kornheiser: You know I love me some LaShontell.
Michael Wilbon: Yeah your slupage was pathetic.
Tony Kornheiser: But he has to be one of the most epic failures to ever grace OPL.
Michael Wilbon: Wow, comin down hard on your boy.
Tony Kornheiser: I mean i'd understand him being 3rd in the depth chart and not getting many plays...
Tony Kornheiser: But when he does he stinks up the joint??
Michael Wilbon: Yeah alot a talk for a guy who can't even hold onto the ball.
Tony Kornheiser: I hear he's already fumbling it up in SAPL.
Michael Wilbon: Maybe less yapping and more carrying...
Tony Kornheiser: Something like that.
Tony Kornheiser: Well its time for the game where I am always 100% correct.
Tony Kornheiser: Odds Makers with your metrosexual host, Tony Reali.
Tony Reali: Greetings gentleman, first touch up on something you've already discussed...
Tony Reali: What are the odds Zeta wins this years championship?
Michael Wilbon: Well over the last handful of years its been Alphas cup with a few spurts of Zeta.
Michael Wilbon: In a championship game you have the best of the best, who's to say Alpha's best isnt as good as Zeta's representative?
Tony Kornheiser: ME! This wasnt Alpha's cup as much as it was WSI's cup. WSI is gone!
Tony Kornheiser: I said it once and i'll say it again, Alpha has no chance. Its Zeta's turn and they're licking their chops! 100%
Michael Wilbon: That's too extreme for me...
Tony Kornheiser: You're going to play it safe like always.
Michael Wilbon: No. I play it smart. Its 1 game, either team could win. Alpha has a 50% chance of winning just like Zeta has a 50% chance.
Tony Kornheiser: Thats weak!
Tony Reali: Tony already making guarantees, get the crow ready.
Tony Reali: Next, the odds VooDoo repeats as the 1st seed?
Tony Kornheiser: VooDoo is a really good squad.
Michael Wilbon: Very solid.
Tony Kornheiser: But Zeta has a crop of solid clubs including some impressive new comers.
Michael Wilbon: This is true.
Tony Kornheiser: I still think they're the team to beat and give them the slight edge over the rest of the pack. 35%
Michael Wilbon: Im with you on this one Tony. Until you're removed from the top you're still the favorite. 30%.
Tony Reali: That one was a bit friendlier.
Tony Reali: Next up, the odds Denver LastDinosaur keeps his MVP crown?
Michael Wilbon: Big ups to Denver for continuing to dominate the OPL.
Tony Kornheiser: This guys a monster. I feel like today is repeat myself day, but i'll say it again.
Tony Kornheiser: Denver is the best defensive player to ever play in OPL.
Michael Wilbon: Ohhh, bringing up the ol' Denver vs. Avalanche debate huh?
Tony Kornheiser: Im not bringing it up, im killing it once and for all!
Tony Kornheiser: One of these two guys currently holds a Defensive MVP trophy and one doesnt.
Michael Wilbon: Avalanche didn't get one?
Tony Kornheiser: NOPE! Denvers still eating sacks for breakfast and Avalanche has all but disappeared into the mist of USAPL.
Tony Kornheiser: Denver is the NEW pride and joy of OPL, and no one will see this crown until he retires! 100%
Michael Wilbon: While I agree Denver will be a tough cookie to outperform, I do believe there are possibilities of teams gutting and people having outrageous performances.
Tony Kornheiser: So what are you saying?
Michael Wilbon: Im saying because of stat padding against guts there is a slight possibility someone leap frogs Denver.
Michael Wilbon: Im still staying high on this one though, 85%.
Tony Reali: There's the Tony we all know. A confident man today are we?
Tony Reali: Lastly, what are the chances our old friend Pagan Fire Eaters make the playoffs?
Tony Kornheiser: They catch a break because they're in Alpha.
Tony Kornheiser: If they were in Zeta I would say not a chance.
Tony Kornheiser: But I could see them slipping into 6th or 7th seed. I say 25%
Michael Wilbon: Yeah me too. Its fun to see them finally up here. We all knew they'd get here someday.
Michael Wilbon: Imma go a bit higher and say 35%. They're a good little team.
Michael Wilbon: Stat boy who's the winner?
Tony Reali: You can never pass up on a guarantee.
Tony Reali: And Mr. Kornheiser has dished out not 1 but 2 guarantees today. Check one for Zeta and one for Denver and one for Kornheiser as today's winner.
Michael Wilbon: That's game is rigged!
Tony Kornheiser: This game is 100% over!
Tony Kornheiser: 1 minute left lets go to big finish.
Michael Wilbon: Let's do it.
Tony Kornheiser: The Megellian Cup heats up with lots of smack talk coming from SAPL. Wilbon your thoughts?
Michael Wilbon: They need to shut their traps until they can actually win one or two.
Michael Wilbon: Osaka has left OPL to slup up the dunces in SAPL. Tony you kind of liked these guys right?
Tony Kornheiser: Yeah but they belong in a league that's all talk and nothing more.
Tony Kornheiser: Wibon the new BDC video is out on http://www.socalbdc.com you had a chance to look at it?
Michael Wilbon: Yeah it was HILARIOUS!
Michael Wilbon: Tony, we're hearing alot of confidence coming from the PMD camp. Think they can hang out alot longer then 1 season this time?
Tony Kornheiser: Hopefully, that last run was pathetic.
Tony Kornheiser: Guam Tigers guarantee of a 20-0 season fell short about 17 wins.
Michael Wilbon: We knew they didn't have a shot...
*HORN*
Michael Wilbon: That's the horn, we'll try and do better the next time.
Michael Wilbon: I'm Michael Wilbon.
Tony Kornheiser: And i'm Tony Kornheiser.
Michael Wilbon: Same time tomorrow knuckleheads.
Tony Kornheiser: Goodnight Canada!
Edited by shutd0wn on Jun 18, 2009 15:25:33
Edited by shutd0wn on Jun 18, 2009 14:19:36
Edited by shutd0wn on Jun 18, 2009 14:17:56
Edited by shutd0wn on Jun 18, 2009 14:16:43
Edited by shutd0wn on Jun 18, 2009 14:15:31
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no mention of St Marys..... damn, my panties are in a bunch.......
