4 undefeated teams left in Alpha after one fell off the list. Only two undefeated teams in Zeta.
It's the quarter mark of the season now, and their is still a whole lotta football going on!
The conferences are starting to get filtered out on who has got what it takes and who are the fakes.
It's time to get this party started! Here are the rankings and predictions for week 5!
________________________________________________________________________________________________
You may or may not agree with them, but this is how I see them.
****ZETA POWER RANKINGS****
LW = Last Week ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched
#1 Macedonia Trojans (4-0) LW 1 - OK, OK, OK! We get it, Trojans. Beating the snot out of some weaker teams may be fun for you guys, but it is quite boring for us.
Time to take a train to the Ukraine.
Next opponent: at #7 Ukraine Freight Train (3-1)
#2 Istanbul Hellhounds (4-0) LW 3 - The Hell Hounds just edged the Funky Bunch 36-34 in the GOW to stay undefeated. A last minute FG saved them from taking their first loss of the season.
Don't get too comfy. Another big match up is here already. This time with the Stoners.
Next opponent: #6 Estonia Stoners (3-1)
#3 The Gods (3-1) LW 2 - Well, Gods..................it's wedgie time!!
The Gods dropped their first game of the season to the Banja Luka Blackshirts, 37-41. The Gods were really never in it until scoring 20 unanswered points in the 4th quarter. But it still wasn't enough to overcome the early deficit.
At least the Pale Riders are up next. That should un-wedge your undies.
Next opponent: at #12 WMD Pale Riders (1-3)
#4 Cool Runnings (3-1) LW 5 - Cool Runnings had a great time in St Petersburg! The beaches, the sun, the cool night air, the fun and the food was to die for. Not to mention scoring 251 points on a bunch of helpless CPU toaster ovens. Ahhhh, what joy that brings!
Tough game up next with the Funky Bunch.
Next opponent: #7 Banja Luka Funky Bunch (2-2)
#5 Estonia Stoners (3-1) LW 6 - The Stoners must have taken some bong hits before the WMD game. 105-24 is pretty gnarly dude.
But the Hell Hounds are up next, so a word of advice......................don't inhale.
Next opponent: at #2 Istanbul Hellhounds (4-0)
#6 Ukraine Freight Train (3-1) LW 7 - The Train turned the Renegades of Funk into the Renegades of Stunk with a 70-27 whooping.
Don't get too cocky, Ukraine. just because you are 3-1 and seem to have a never ending stream of really hot female tennis stars, doesn't mean it will be like that every time.
For instance................the Trojans are next.
Next opponent: #1 Macedonia Trojans (4-0)
#7 Banja Luka Funky Bunch (2-2) LW 4 - Ouch! 34-36 loss to Istanbul puts the roller disco Bunchers down to #7. Still a lot of games left to get you guys caught up and back in the thick of things.
Another big game against Cool Runnings is next.
Next opponent: at #4 Cool Runnings (3-1)
#8 Vancouver Jive Turkeys (2-2) LW 8 - The Jive Turkeys took a 21-10 lead at halftime and never looked back in their victory over Providence.
You guys are 2-2 now and should be strutting around like Fly Guy:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4wI-BBNxwI
The Boracs are up next.
Next opponent: #10 Banja Luka Boracs (2-2)
#9 Banja Luka Blackshirts (2-2) LW 9 - What a big win for the Blackshirts! 41-37 over the Gods.
If you guys can do that to the Gods, I wonder what you guys can do up against the Black hawks?
Next opponent: #13 Providence Black Hawks (1-3)
#10 Banja Luka Boracs (2-2) LW 10 - The Boracs creamed the Luzitian Dynasty, 66-7. Back to .500 now and starting to show what they are made of.
Up next are the Jive Turkeys and a rankings battle. Here's the perfect opportunity to move up and out some space between you and the rest of the 2-2's.
Next opponent: at #8 Vancouver Jive Turkeys (2-2)
#11 Renegades of Funk (1-3) LW 11 - Alright Renegades. You've been blown away in all three of your losses. 16-76, 3-41, 27-70. If you're going to lose, might as well really lose so at least you're not pulling your hair out over a close loss.
You guys need a break, so here is one named the Luzitian Dynasty.
Next opponent: at #14 Luzitian Dynasty (0-4)
#12 WMD Pale Riders (1-3) LW 12 - Well WMD has also been blown out in all three of there losses, just like ROF above.
But just like the Seinfeld Soup Nazi says........................NO BREAK FOR YOU!
Ok so he says soup, but soup is for flaming drunks named Chad.
The Gods are here next.
Next opponent: #3 The Gods (3-1)
#13 Providence Black Hawks (1-3) LW 13 - Providence is still hanging in there. Three double digit losses, but have yet to be truly blown out. You guys need a win badly. This season only one win is guaranteed (Destroyers) and if you don't string some wins together, it will be an early exit.
The Blakshirts are waiting for ya'.
Next opponent: at #9 Banja Luka Blackshirts (2-2)
#14 Luzitian Dynasty (0-4) LW 14 - Well Luzit and Vladdy. As they used to sing at the end of "The Carol Burnett Show" (man I am old to remember that show, but a great and hilarious show).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DDAx473AFpA
We might be seeing you guys go down to BBB if this keeps up.
The ROF are next. Maybe a win will come with them.
Next opponent: #11 Renegades of Funk (1-3)
#15 Wroclaw Wrecking Crew (0-4) LW 15 - The Wrecking Crew have yet to Wreck anything. But, lookie what is coming up next for you blue collar wannabe's.
It's an all expense paid vacation to beautiful St Petersburg, Russia.
Yes, that's right, St Petersburg! The city that cost thousands of lives to build. The city that was built over a toxic swamp. The city that invented river dancing (those bastards!).
So enjoy the memories of the dead and the noxious fumes and crappy dancing. And while you're there, try the Piroshki's, they're the best!
http://www.restorate.ru/imgNews/2007/11/8/text-2409-3853-pirojki-big.jpg
If you guys can't beat the CPU Destroyers, it's nothing but hot chick pics for you the rest of the season.
And some of us might prefer that.
Next opponent: at #16 St. Petersburg Destroyers (0-4)
#16 St. Petersburg Destroyers (0-4) LW 16 - I would like to say something here, but who cares.
On to the hot chick pic!
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2001/11marsha/Marsha-04.jpg
Next opponent: #15 Wroclaw Wrecking Crew (0-4)
*****WEEK 5 PREDICTIONS*****
Here's my prediction record week by week.
Week 2: 5-3, Week 3: 7-1, Week 4: 5-3, Week 5:
Overall: 17-7
GOW: 1-2
8 Ball GOW: 2-1
#11 Renegades of Funk (1-3) at #14 Luzitian Dynasty (0-4) = Renegades Of Funk - Oh wow. This one could go either way, but I'm taking ROF.
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#13 Providence Black Hawks (1-3) at #9 Banja Luka Blackshirts (2-2) = Banja Luka Blackshirts - Both teams really need this win. Bur the Blackshirts should end up taking it.
Game Rating: 3/6 beers
#10 Banja Luka Boracs (2-2) at #8 Vancouver Jive Turkeys (2-2) = Vancouver Jive Turkeys - Here's a good match up. Both teams look like they could make the playoffs, buyt this one should go to the J.T.'s.
Game Rating: 4/6 beers
#15 Wroclaw Wrecking Crew (0-4) at #16 St. Petersburg Destroyers (0-4) = Wroclaw Wrecking Crew - The winner of this years Zeta Toilet Bowl is.................the Wre.....*blurp*.......*blerch*........sorry, I just threw up in my mouth a little when I tried to say their name.
Game Rating: 1/6 beers
#5 Estonia Stoners (3-1) at #2 Istanbul Hellhounds (4-0) = Istanbul Hell Hounds - After eeking out a win against the Funky Bunch, the Hell Hounds are looking sharp.
Game Rating: 6/6 beers
#3 The Gods (3-1) at #12 WMD Pale Riders (1-3) = The Gods - Don't even hesitate..........take the Gods.
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#1 Macedonia Trojans (4-0) at #6 Ukraine Freight Train (3-1) = Macedonia Trojans - Really good match up, but the Trojans will be too much for the Train.
Game Rating: 6/6 beers
#7 Banja Luka Funky Bunch (2-2) at #4 Cool Runnings (3-1) = Cool Runnings - Cool Runnings will end up with the W.
Game Rating: 5/6 beers
*Game Of The Week*
#5 Estonia Stoners (3-1) at #2 Istanbul Hellhounds (4-0) - Two GOW's in a row for Istanbul! Don't take those Stoners lightly.
#5 vs #2! A top 4 ranking is at stake in this one. Estonia would move up with a W and the Hell Hounds would remain in the Top 4 if they won.
This one has it all!
Hounds from the depths of hell!
Hippies, pot smoking slackers and a huge case of the munchies!
It's like there is a party in my pants and everyone is invited!!
Let's do this shit!!
Magic 8 Ball says: Istanbul Hell Hounds - Signs point to yes.
29/48 beers! - Oh yeah!! 29 beers this week! Woot woot!! 29 beers and the games to match!
Stoners/Hell Hounds, Funky Bunch/Cool Runnings, Trojans/Freight Train, Boracs/Jive Tirkeys!! Four, count'em, four great match ups for week numero cinco for Cinco De Mayo!!
Let's do this shit!
Good luck to all the teams in Zeta Conference!
____________________________________________________________________________
****ALPHA POWER RANKINGS****
LW = Last Week Ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched
#1 Kazan Golden Horde (4-0) LW 1 - Can you say, "Kazan Golden Smexies"?
It looks like it is shaping up that way.
One of the two teams that have a shot at beating the Horde is up next.
Get ready for those Gunzenhausen Wolfpack.
Next opponent: at #3 Gunzenhausen Wolfpack (4-0)
#2 Macedonia Diadochi (4-0) LW 2 - Macedonia knocked off one undefeated team and they are steamrolling their competition.
Another big game is waiting for ya' though. The Joe's are in town and ready to play some Dodgeball!
Next opponent: #6 Average Joe's (3-1)
#3 Gunzenhausen Wolfpack (4-0) LW 3 - What a close one! 27-27 at the end of the 3rd quarter and the Wolfpack end up with the win, 41-37.
Now it's time to really test yourselves. Take on the #1 team and get the win and that could vault you guys to the #1 top spot.
Lose and you suck.
Ready to welcome the #1 Kazan Golden Horde.
Next opponent: #1 Kazan Golden Horde (4-0)
#4 Kiev Pit Bulls (4-0) LW 4 - Who let the dogs out? That damn Mad Dog44 did, that's who!
These dawg's are rolling! 4-0 and looks like that won't change for the next two games.
Enjoy a two game vacation Pit Bullies!
The Impalers and the Gryphons are back to back. Go knock up some willing pooch in heat while your there.
Next opponent: at #15 Wallachia Impalers (1-3)
#5 Valhalla Einherjar (3-1) LW 5 - Wake up call!!
You guys are good, but the Diadochi are fucking good!
A 17-69 ass whooping sounded that, loud and clear.
But you guys are still on the playoff track. Amsterdam is up next and a chance to get back to winning.
Next opponent: #10 Amsterdam Hallucinations (1-3)
#6 Average Joe's (3-1) LW 7 - The Joe's pantsed the Gryphons in front of the entire class, 105-14. No messing around there. The Joe's are like MacGyver, you can make a win out of anything.
Let's see if you guys can carry that over to game 5, the Macedonia Diadochi.
Next opponent: at #2 Macedonia Diadochi (4-0)
#7 Iron Curtain Psychos (2-2) LW 6 - Psychos drop to 2-2 after a loss to the Pit Bulls. Trying to win by only kicking field goals is a brave strategy that just didn't pay off.
Go for W #3 against the Royal Guards.
Next opponent: #13 St. Petersburg Royal Guards (1-3)
#8 Vienna River Bandits (2-2) LW 12 - The River bandits earn win number two over the Royal Guards, 38-23.
Enjoy it. Really savor it. Soak in all the winning juices.
Because it could be the last one you get for a long........long........time.
Next opponent: #14 Wildflecken Wolverines (1-3)
#9 Krakow Plumbers Crack (1-3) LW 8 - Well Crack, it's just been a really crappy start. 1-3 is not where everyone expected you to be at the quarter mar5k of the season.
But, there is redemption ahead with Greece and Vienna both up next.
Next opponent: at #11 Greece Lightning (1-3)
#10 Amsterdam Hallucinations (1-3) LW 9 - Well I think I hear the Dutch crying. Maybe we should call them Waaaaahh-msterdam.
But once you guys get past the beastly six game murderers row stretch, you will be set up for a monster comeback.
Next opponent: at #5 Valhalla Einherjar (3-1)
#11 Greece Lightning (1-3) LW 10 - Well, if Average Joe's are the MacGyver of Alpha, then Greece Lightning is the MacGruber of Alpha. Nothing has gone right.
After winning their first game they have lost all three games since then.
And guess what? Nothing will go right in the next game either, with the Crack up next.
Next opponent: #9 Krakow Plumbers Crack (1-3)
#12 Bohemia Gryphons (1-3) LW 11 - It looks like the Gryphons are trying to help out the economy. Score one TD, score the next three free!
How nice of them.
A win could be next for them when the Hungthemselves Hitmen come to town.
Next opponent: #16 Hungarian Hitmen (0-4)
#13 St. Petersburg Royal Guards (1-3) LW 13 - The Royal Guard drop another game and go to 1-3. Not much has gone St Petersburgs' way so far this season. And it doesn't look like their luck is about to change with ICP up next.
Next opponent: at #7 Iron Curtain Psychos (2-2)
#14 Wildflecken Wolverines (1-3) LW 14 - FINALLY!! After coming so close, the Wolverines finally get that W notched upon their lipstick case. 34-10 over the Greece Lightning gets them that elusive W.
W #2 could be next when you take on the Vienna River Bandits.
Next opponent: at #8 Vienna River Bandits (2-2)
#15 Wallachia Impalers (1-3) LW 16 - The Impalers win! The Impalers win! The Implalers win!
Enjoy the taste of victory. And I mean a taste. It may be the only win this season.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2001/11lisa/Lisa-04.jpg
Next opponent: #4 Kiev Pit Bulls (4-0)
#16 Hungarian Hitmen (0-4) LW 15 - Ugh.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2001/10rachel/Rachel-12.jpg
Next opponent: at #12 Bohemia Gryphons (1-3)
*****WEEK 5 PREDICTIONS*****
Here's my prediction record week by week.
Week 2: 7-1, Week 3: 7-1, Week 4: 6-2, Week 5:
Overall: 20-4
GOW: 3-0
8 Ball: 2-1
#1 Kazan Golden Horde (4-0) at #3 Gunzenhausen Wolfpack (4-0) = Kazan Golden Horde - Here we go! This is a match up! Going to take the Horde in this one.
Game Rating: 6/6 beers
#6 Average Joe's (3-1) at #2 Macedonia Diadochi (4-0) = Macedonia Diadochi - No show, no Joe. Take the Diadochi.
Game Rating: 6/6 beers
#10 Amsterdam Hallucinations (1-3) at #5 Valhalla Einherjar (3-1) = Valhalla Einherjar - A tough one to call, but I will go with Valhalla.
Game Rating: 3/6 beers
#9 Krakow Plumbers Crack (1-3) at #11 Greece Lightning (1-3) = Krakow Plumber's Crack - Krakow has got to get a win here.
Game Rating: 3/6 beers
#13 St. Petersburg Royal Guards (1-3) at #7 Iron Curtain Psychos (2-2) = Iron Curtain Psycho's - Go to town you Psycho bastards!
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#14 Wildflecken Wolverines (1-3) at #8 Vienna River Bandits (2-2) = Wildflecken Wolverines - Wolverines should get this one to make them 2-3.
Game Rating: 3/6 beers
#16 Hungarian Hitmen (0-4) at #12 Bohemia Gryphons (1-3) = Bohemia Gryphons - Who knows, stranger shit has happened.
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#4 Kiev Pit Bulls (4-0) at #15 Wallachia Impalers (1-3) = Kiev Pit Bulls - Like the Impalers will really have a shot at the win.
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
*Game Of The Week*
#1 Kazan Golden Horde (4-0) at #3 Gunzenhausen Wolfpack (4-0) - It's the GOW on Monday Morning Football!
The biggest match up of the season thus far.
The Horde want to stay on top! The Wolfpack want to be the Top! Only one way to settle this one!
CAGE MATCH! Only way to win is to climb out of the cage....................or score more points than the other team.
Let's do this shit!!
Magic 8 Ball says: Gunzenhausen Wolfpack - It is certain.
27/48 beers! - Average Joe's vs the Macedonia Diadochi is the only other worthwhile match up, other than the GOW. So looks like we can get fairly good and sloshed with these 27 beers! What a way to start the week off on a Monday morning!
Good luck to all the teams in Alpha Conference!
It's the quarter mark of the season now, and their is still a whole lotta football going on!
The conferences are starting to get filtered out on who has got what it takes and who are the fakes.
It's time to get this party started! Here are the rankings and predictions for week 5!
________________________________________________________________________________________________
You may or may not agree with them, but this is how I see them.
****ZETA POWER RANKINGS****
LW = Last Week ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched
#1 Macedonia Trojans (4-0) LW 1 - OK, OK, OK! We get it, Trojans. Beating the snot out of some weaker teams may be fun for you guys, but it is quite boring for us.
Time to take a train to the Ukraine.
Next opponent: at #7 Ukraine Freight Train (3-1)
#2 Istanbul Hellhounds (4-0) LW 3 - The Hell Hounds just edged the Funky Bunch 36-34 in the GOW to stay undefeated. A last minute FG saved them from taking their first loss of the season.
Don't get too comfy. Another big match up is here already. This time with the Stoners.
Next opponent: #6 Estonia Stoners (3-1)
#3 The Gods (3-1) LW 2 - Well, Gods..................it's wedgie time!!
The Gods dropped their first game of the season to the Banja Luka Blackshirts, 37-41. The Gods were really never in it until scoring 20 unanswered points in the 4th quarter. But it still wasn't enough to overcome the early deficit.
At least the Pale Riders are up next. That should un-wedge your undies.
Next opponent: at #12 WMD Pale Riders (1-3)
#4 Cool Runnings (3-1) LW 5 - Cool Runnings had a great time in St Petersburg! The beaches, the sun, the cool night air, the fun and the food was to die for. Not to mention scoring 251 points on a bunch of helpless CPU toaster ovens. Ahhhh, what joy that brings!
Tough game up next with the Funky Bunch.
Next opponent: #7 Banja Luka Funky Bunch (2-2)
#5 Estonia Stoners (3-1) LW 6 - The Stoners must have taken some bong hits before the WMD game. 105-24 is pretty gnarly dude.
But the Hell Hounds are up next, so a word of advice......................don't inhale.
Next opponent: at #2 Istanbul Hellhounds (4-0)
#6 Ukraine Freight Train (3-1) LW 7 - The Train turned the Renegades of Funk into the Renegades of Stunk with a 70-27 whooping.
Don't get too cocky, Ukraine. just because you are 3-1 and seem to have a never ending stream of really hot female tennis stars, doesn't mean it will be like that every time.
For instance................the Trojans are next.
Next opponent: #1 Macedonia Trojans (4-0)
#7 Banja Luka Funky Bunch (2-2) LW 4 - Ouch! 34-36 loss to Istanbul puts the roller disco Bunchers down to #7. Still a lot of games left to get you guys caught up and back in the thick of things.
Another big game against Cool Runnings is next.
Next opponent: at #4 Cool Runnings (3-1)
#8 Vancouver Jive Turkeys (2-2) LW 8 - The Jive Turkeys took a 21-10 lead at halftime and never looked back in their victory over Providence.
You guys are 2-2 now and should be strutting around like Fly Guy:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4wI-BBNxwI
The Boracs are up next.
Next opponent: #10 Banja Luka Boracs (2-2)
#9 Banja Luka Blackshirts (2-2) LW 9 - What a big win for the Blackshirts! 41-37 over the Gods.
If you guys can do that to the Gods, I wonder what you guys can do up against the Black hawks?
Next opponent: #13 Providence Black Hawks (1-3)
#10 Banja Luka Boracs (2-2) LW 10 - The Boracs creamed the Luzitian Dynasty, 66-7. Back to .500 now and starting to show what they are made of.
Up next are the Jive Turkeys and a rankings battle. Here's the perfect opportunity to move up and out some space between you and the rest of the 2-2's.
Next opponent: at #8 Vancouver Jive Turkeys (2-2)
#11 Renegades of Funk (1-3) LW 11 - Alright Renegades. You've been blown away in all three of your losses. 16-76, 3-41, 27-70. If you're going to lose, might as well really lose so at least you're not pulling your hair out over a close loss.
You guys need a break, so here is one named the Luzitian Dynasty.
Next opponent: at #14 Luzitian Dynasty (0-4)
#12 WMD Pale Riders (1-3) LW 12 - Well WMD has also been blown out in all three of there losses, just like ROF above.
But just like the Seinfeld Soup Nazi says........................NO BREAK FOR YOU!
Ok so he says soup, but soup is for flaming drunks named Chad.
The Gods are here next.
Next opponent: #3 The Gods (3-1)
#13 Providence Black Hawks (1-3) LW 13 - Providence is still hanging in there. Three double digit losses, but have yet to be truly blown out. You guys need a win badly. This season only one win is guaranteed (Destroyers) and if you don't string some wins together, it will be an early exit.
The Blakshirts are waiting for ya'.
Next opponent: at #9 Banja Luka Blackshirts (2-2)
#14 Luzitian Dynasty (0-4) LW 14 - Well Luzit and Vladdy. As they used to sing at the end of "The Carol Burnett Show" (man I am old to remember that show, but a great and hilarious show).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DDAx473AFpA
We might be seeing you guys go down to BBB if this keeps up.
The ROF are next. Maybe a win will come with them.
Next opponent: #11 Renegades of Funk (1-3)
#15 Wroclaw Wrecking Crew (0-4) LW 15 - The Wrecking Crew have yet to Wreck anything. But, lookie what is coming up next for you blue collar wannabe's.
It's an all expense paid vacation to beautiful St Petersburg, Russia.
Yes, that's right, St Petersburg! The city that cost thousands of lives to build. The city that was built over a toxic swamp. The city that invented river dancing (those bastards!).
So enjoy the memories of the dead and the noxious fumes and crappy dancing. And while you're there, try the Piroshki's, they're the best!
http://www.restorate.ru/imgNews/2007/11/8/text-2409-3853-pirojki-big.jpg
If you guys can't beat the CPU Destroyers, it's nothing but hot chick pics for you the rest of the season.
And some of us might prefer that.
Next opponent: at #16 St. Petersburg Destroyers (0-4)
#16 St. Petersburg Destroyers (0-4) LW 16 - I would like to say something here, but who cares.
On to the hot chick pic!
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2001/11marsha/Marsha-04.jpg
Next opponent: #15 Wroclaw Wrecking Crew (0-4)
*****WEEK 5 PREDICTIONS*****
Here's my prediction record week by week.
Week 2: 5-3, Week 3: 7-1, Week 4: 5-3, Week 5:
Overall: 17-7
GOW: 1-2
8 Ball GOW: 2-1
#11 Renegades of Funk (1-3) at #14 Luzitian Dynasty (0-4) = Renegades Of Funk - Oh wow. This one could go either way, but I'm taking ROF.
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#13 Providence Black Hawks (1-3) at #9 Banja Luka Blackshirts (2-2) = Banja Luka Blackshirts - Both teams really need this win. Bur the Blackshirts should end up taking it.
Game Rating: 3/6 beers
#10 Banja Luka Boracs (2-2) at #8 Vancouver Jive Turkeys (2-2) = Vancouver Jive Turkeys - Here's a good match up. Both teams look like they could make the playoffs, buyt this one should go to the J.T.'s.
Game Rating: 4/6 beers
#15 Wroclaw Wrecking Crew (0-4) at #16 St. Petersburg Destroyers (0-4) = Wroclaw Wrecking Crew - The winner of this years Zeta Toilet Bowl is.................the Wre.....*blurp*.......*blerch*........sorry, I just threw up in my mouth a little when I tried to say their name.
Game Rating: 1/6 beers
#5 Estonia Stoners (3-1) at #2 Istanbul Hellhounds (4-0) = Istanbul Hell Hounds - After eeking out a win against the Funky Bunch, the Hell Hounds are looking sharp.
Game Rating: 6/6 beers
#3 The Gods (3-1) at #12 WMD Pale Riders (1-3) = The Gods - Don't even hesitate..........take the Gods.
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#1 Macedonia Trojans (4-0) at #6 Ukraine Freight Train (3-1) = Macedonia Trojans - Really good match up, but the Trojans will be too much for the Train.
Game Rating: 6/6 beers
#7 Banja Luka Funky Bunch (2-2) at #4 Cool Runnings (3-1) = Cool Runnings - Cool Runnings will end up with the W.
Game Rating: 5/6 beers
*Game Of The Week*
#5 Estonia Stoners (3-1) at #2 Istanbul Hellhounds (4-0) - Two GOW's in a row for Istanbul! Don't take those Stoners lightly.
#5 vs #2! A top 4 ranking is at stake in this one. Estonia would move up with a W and the Hell Hounds would remain in the Top 4 if they won.
This one has it all!
Hounds from the depths of hell!
Hippies, pot smoking slackers and a huge case of the munchies!
It's like there is a party in my pants and everyone is invited!!
Let's do this shit!!
Magic 8 Ball says: Istanbul Hell Hounds - Signs point to yes.
29/48 beers! - Oh yeah!! 29 beers this week! Woot woot!! 29 beers and the games to match!
Stoners/Hell Hounds, Funky Bunch/Cool Runnings, Trojans/Freight Train, Boracs/Jive Tirkeys!! Four, count'em, four great match ups for week numero cinco for Cinco De Mayo!!
Let's do this shit!
Good luck to all the teams in Zeta Conference!
____________________________________________________________________________
****ALPHA POWER RANKINGS****
LW = Last Week Ranking
* = Play Off spot clinched
#1 Kazan Golden Horde (4-0) LW 1 - Can you say, "Kazan Golden Smexies"?
It looks like it is shaping up that way.
One of the two teams that have a shot at beating the Horde is up next.
Get ready for those Gunzenhausen Wolfpack.
Next opponent: at #3 Gunzenhausen Wolfpack (4-0)
#2 Macedonia Diadochi (4-0) LW 2 - Macedonia knocked off one undefeated team and they are steamrolling their competition.
Another big game is waiting for ya' though. The Joe's are in town and ready to play some Dodgeball!
Next opponent: #6 Average Joe's (3-1)
#3 Gunzenhausen Wolfpack (4-0) LW 3 - What a close one! 27-27 at the end of the 3rd quarter and the Wolfpack end up with the win, 41-37.
Now it's time to really test yourselves. Take on the #1 team and get the win and that could vault you guys to the #1 top spot.
Lose and you suck.
Ready to welcome the #1 Kazan Golden Horde.
Next opponent: #1 Kazan Golden Horde (4-0)
#4 Kiev Pit Bulls (4-0) LW 4 - Who let the dogs out? That damn Mad Dog44 did, that's who!
These dawg's are rolling! 4-0 and looks like that won't change for the next two games.
Enjoy a two game vacation Pit Bullies!
The Impalers and the Gryphons are back to back. Go knock up some willing pooch in heat while your there.
Next opponent: at #15 Wallachia Impalers (1-3)
#5 Valhalla Einherjar (3-1) LW 5 - Wake up call!!
You guys are good, but the Diadochi are fucking good!
A 17-69 ass whooping sounded that, loud and clear.
But you guys are still on the playoff track. Amsterdam is up next and a chance to get back to winning.
Next opponent: #10 Amsterdam Hallucinations (1-3)
#6 Average Joe's (3-1) LW 7 - The Joe's pantsed the Gryphons in front of the entire class, 105-14. No messing around there. The Joe's are like MacGyver, you can make a win out of anything.
Let's see if you guys can carry that over to game 5, the Macedonia Diadochi.
Next opponent: at #2 Macedonia Diadochi (4-0)
#7 Iron Curtain Psychos (2-2) LW 6 - Psychos drop to 2-2 after a loss to the Pit Bulls. Trying to win by only kicking field goals is a brave strategy that just didn't pay off.
Go for W #3 against the Royal Guards.
Next opponent: #13 St. Petersburg Royal Guards (1-3)
#8 Vienna River Bandits (2-2) LW 12 - The River bandits earn win number two over the Royal Guards, 38-23.
Enjoy it. Really savor it. Soak in all the winning juices.
Because it could be the last one you get for a long........long........time.
Next opponent: #14 Wildflecken Wolverines (1-3)
#9 Krakow Plumbers Crack (1-3) LW 8 - Well Crack, it's just been a really crappy start. 1-3 is not where everyone expected you to be at the quarter mar5k of the season.
But, there is redemption ahead with Greece and Vienna both up next.
Next opponent: at #11 Greece Lightning (1-3)
#10 Amsterdam Hallucinations (1-3) LW 9 - Well I think I hear the Dutch crying. Maybe we should call them Waaaaahh-msterdam.
But once you guys get past the beastly six game murderers row stretch, you will be set up for a monster comeback.
Next opponent: at #5 Valhalla Einherjar (3-1)
#11 Greece Lightning (1-3) LW 10 - Well, if Average Joe's are the MacGyver of Alpha, then Greece Lightning is the MacGruber of Alpha. Nothing has gone right.
After winning their first game they have lost all three games since then.
And guess what? Nothing will go right in the next game either, with the Crack up next.
Next opponent: #9 Krakow Plumbers Crack (1-3)
#12 Bohemia Gryphons (1-3) LW 11 - It looks like the Gryphons are trying to help out the economy. Score one TD, score the next three free!
How nice of them.
A win could be next for them when the Hungthemselves Hitmen come to town.
Next opponent: #16 Hungarian Hitmen (0-4)
#13 St. Petersburg Royal Guards (1-3) LW 13 - The Royal Guard drop another game and go to 1-3. Not much has gone St Petersburgs' way so far this season. And it doesn't look like their luck is about to change with ICP up next.
Next opponent: at #7 Iron Curtain Psychos (2-2)
#14 Wildflecken Wolverines (1-3) LW 14 - FINALLY!! After coming so close, the Wolverines finally get that W notched upon their lipstick case. 34-10 over the Greece Lightning gets them that elusive W.
W #2 could be next when you take on the Vienna River Bandits.
Next opponent: at #8 Vienna River Bandits (2-2)
#15 Wallachia Impalers (1-3) LW 16 - The Impalers win! The Impalers win! The Implalers win!
Enjoy the taste of victory. And I mean a taste. It may be the only win this season.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2001/11lisa/Lisa-04.jpg
Next opponent: #4 Kiev Pit Bulls (4-0)
#16 Hungarian Hitmen (0-4) LW 15 - Ugh.
http://www.bullz-eye.com/gnd/2001/10rachel/Rachel-12.jpg
Next opponent: at #12 Bohemia Gryphons (1-3)
*****WEEK 5 PREDICTIONS*****
Here's my prediction record week by week.
Week 2: 7-1, Week 3: 7-1, Week 4: 6-2, Week 5:
Overall: 20-4
GOW: 3-0
8 Ball: 2-1
#1 Kazan Golden Horde (4-0) at #3 Gunzenhausen Wolfpack (4-0) = Kazan Golden Horde - Here we go! This is a match up! Going to take the Horde in this one.
Game Rating: 6/6 beers
#6 Average Joe's (3-1) at #2 Macedonia Diadochi (4-0) = Macedonia Diadochi - No show, no Joe. Take the Diadochi.
Game Rating: 6/6 beers
#10 Amsterdam Hallucinations (1-3) at #5 Valhalla Einherjar (3-1) = Valhalla Einherjar - A tough one to call, but I will go with Valhalla.
Game Rating: 3/6 beers
#9 Krakow Plumbers Crack (1-3) at #11 Greece Lightning (1-3) = Krakow Plumber's Crack - Krakow has got to get a win here.
Game Rating: 3/6 beers
#13 St. Petersburg Royal Guards (1-3) at #7 Iron Curtain Psychos (2-2) = Iron Curtain Psycho's - Go to town you Psycho bastards!
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#14 Wildflecken Wolverines (1-3) at #8 Vienna River Bandits (2-2) = Wildflecken Wolverines - Wolverines should get this one to make them 2-3.
Game Rating: 3/6 beers
#16 Hungarian Hitmen (0-4) at #12 Bohemia Gryphons (1-3) = Bohemia Gryphons - Who knows, stranger shit has happened.
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
#4 Kiev Pit Bulls (4-0) at #15 Wallachia Impalers (1-3) = Kiev Pit Bulls - Like the Impalers will really have a shot at the win.
Game Rating: 2/6 beers
*Game Of The Week*
#1 Kazan Golden Horde (4-0) at #3 Gunzenhausen Wolfpack (4-0) - It's the GOW on Monday Morning Football!
The biggest match up of the season thus far.
The Horde want to stay on top! The Wolfpack want to be the Top! Only one way to settle this one!
CAGE MATCH! Only way to win is to climb out of the cage....................or score more points than the other team.
Let's do this shit!!
Magic 8 Ball says: Gunzenhausen Wolfpack - It is certain.
27/48 beers! - Average Joe's vs the Macedonia Diadochi is the only other worthwhile match up, other than the GOW. So looks like we can get fairly good and sloshed with these 27 beers! What a way to start the week off on a Monday morning!
Good luck to all the teams in Alpha Conference!
Last edited May 2, 2009 14:11:23
