Season 8 is finally upon us. After the long offseason and plenty of smack talk from several bored agents, we can finally get down to the business of finding the next EEAA2 Zeta Conference Champion. Despite the buzz in the forums, there is no one team in the conference that looks to dominate the entire field, as this is a very evenly matched group.
Week 1 begins the season with the GLB traditional out of conference matchups. So far in the preseason, Alpha has looked very capable against the Zeta teams, but Zeta will be looking to prove that scrimmages mean nothing and only the regular season and postseason matter. Without further ado, let's take a look at the teams that make up Zeta and get an idea of who's who and what's what in this very tough conference.
Sebastian Jani-Dates: The highest rated team in the conference, the Jani-Dates look to improve on last season's debacle. Coming off of an 0-16 season, there's nowhere to go but up, and team owner Kutzy has thrown it all in with the Even boys to make a run for the championship. This is Daniel Snyder's Dream Team, a single agent with all of the right players whose signing suddenly makes the Dates look like the team to beat. The chemistry hit came early and is already disappearing fast, so anyone looking to take advantage will have to do so early. The overall quality of the players will make chemistry a non factor, for the most part.
Jefferson City Bucks - Another team to watch out for, the Bucks are hungry after losing the conference championship to the Macedonian Lions. The roster showcases a lot of high level talent, and they've shown that they know how to win games. The offense is fully capable of focusing either way, forcing opposing defenses to play a guessing game when planning out their tactics. The Bucks will almost certainly make another deep playoff run this season.
Macedonian Lions - Last season's EEA3 League Champion, the Lions find themselves in the enviable position of being promoted into this league ready to compete again. They also have the privilige of facing the Sebastian Jani-Dates early in the season, at a time when team chemistry might still be a bit of a factor. They do come into the league with a bit of a bullseye on their foreheads, as many of their former opponents have come here as well, and will gameplan especially fervently against the Lions. Macedonian's chances at a second trophy will be determined by how well they handle the teams that want revenge.
Kazakhstan Dragons - The Dragons are no stranger to the league, having been promoted in the previous season after winning the EEA4 Zeta Conference championship. Despite being at a disadvantage, Kazakhstan played well enough to get themselves into the playoffs, but couldn't advance to the next round. This season, they will try to change that outcome, and so far look to be in good shape to contend with the best of the league. A few good pickups in free agency should help the cause, but they will have some work to do to overcome the personnel issues that come along with recruiting, such as the big chemistry hit, and the CPU punter. That said, if there was any position I would rather have a high level CPU player in if I had to, it would be the punter.
Bratislava Butchers - Last season, the Butchers were primed to win it all, until their fiercest rival, the Secretville Offtopics, pulled out an amazing overtime win to end Bratislava's undefeated season in the EEA4 Zeta Conference championships. One look at the starting roster and you can see that this is not last year's Butchers, but a new and improved version hungry to prove a point. Key offseason pickups and a team first attitude from the agents allowed Bratislava to keep the core of the team intact while vastly improving the starting lineup without taking a huge chemistry hit. As a Butcher, all I can say is, we don't have any expectations of dominating this league the way we did last season, but we aren't planning on laying down, either. We're here to compete.
Hill Valley Deloreans - Hill Valley moved into this league last season feeling pretty good about their performance in EEA4, having only lost three games to two teams. They didn't have the juice to compete as well as they would have liked last season, barely missing the playoffs. This season they have the benefit of experience in this league, and will make things tough on the newly promoted teams. The EEA4 promotees remember Hill Valley's success there, however. Without Cosa Nostra around to focus some of their vengeful attitudes upon, the Deloreans may find themselves targeted by default.
Czechoslovakia Mates - The disappointment of last season will be forgotten as the new season brings new possibilities. Chess requires a great deal of patience and planning, and the Czech Mates know that football is nothing more than human chess. A few offseason moves here, an AI tweak or two there, and suddenly you've turned a 6-10 team into a playoff contender. Whether the Mates have been successful with this strategy is still very much up in the air, but close losses to superior teams in the preseason does bode well for their future. They say there's no such thing as a good loss, but I don't subscribe to that theory.
Secretville Offtopics - After beating the unbeatable Butchers to secure their place in the EEA4 League Championship, the Offtopics were defeated in a close game by Alpha's Vinius Velociraptors. Everyone's favorite British wig-dog and company now look to continue their excellence here in the killing fields of EEAA2. The Offtopics are one of those teams that have as good a chance as anyone of making a deep run into the playoffs, but the competition is much more intense here. With very little roster movement to speak of, Secretville looks much the same as they did last year, which is still a very tough team to beat.
Maribor Triforce - The only team to beat the Macedonian Lions last season, the Triforce couldn't spark that magic twice when they lost a brutal defense-heavy playoff game in the second round. The rematch is set for week two of this season, and a Triforce win could set an interesting tone for the whole conference. This is a very good team that will find itself competing with a lot of other very good teams, all vying for a decent playoff seed behind the conference big dogs.
Mombasa Wombats - During the last regular season, the Wombats beat the Bucks and the Triforce and played a tough game against the Lions, but the Bucks triumphed in the playoff rematch against Mombasa. The Wombats' promotion to the next level sets up some very interesting matchups against these teams. Like the Triforce, they will contend for a bottom berth toward the end of the season. From what I can tell by their chemistry, they have made few moves and will keep the core of their team intact as they make their run at the postseason.
Warsaw Wolfpack - Last season's losses for the Wolfpack all came at the hands of the EEA4 opponents they must face again, a situation that has to be a little worrying for an otherwise fine team. Warsaw started last season with big chemistry hits from recruiting, and this season will begin that way again. Against the multitude of lesser opponents EEA4 provided, their poor chemistry wasn't much of a factor, but with so many close games ahead against equal or better teams, the Wolfpack may find themselves having a hard time winning.
WhatsaMatta U Fighting Elk - After a 0-5 start last season, the Elk managed to squeak their way into the playoffs on the basis of a few tiebreakers. Their luck ran out in the first round, but the new season has them ready to take on the next wave of promotees. The Elk performed okay in the preseason, with a strong game against Arkadak, but could have beaten the Black Belts had their defense been a little tighter. However, as I have stated before, the preseason means little, so only time will tell what the Elk really have in their tank.
South City Chiefs - After a 14-2 season, the Chiefs got rolled under the Offtopic bus on the way to the championship. The Chiefs may have been the team to inspire the Italy Guardians to hire BigRagu's Hitmen away from EEAA2, handing them a frist round defeat before the Secretville loss. This season, the Chiefs may be an overlooked contender, having already lost two tough scrimmages against Alpha. They have the ability to win games, but still have something to prove in the eyes of most of the league.
Prague Beersteins - The Beersteins had a nice season going in EEA3, but ran into the Texas Red Dragons on the way. Their solid performance led to their promotion, but the Beersteins won't see many of their old opponents. Prague was an Alpha team last season, so the rest of the promotees from their conference are in our Alpha now. The Beersteins essentially wipe the slate clean with the move, since hardly anyone has played against their AI, nor have they seen much of their opponents' AI. Prague is a mystery, wrapped in an enigma...
Cypriot Freedom - The slow buildin' slowbuilders are in a tough spot this season. Usually, when you look at your schedule at the beginning of the season, you tend to look first for the guaranteed wins. This gives you something to build on as you look at your "maybe we can win" games. Unfortunately, this conference has a severe shortage of guaranteed wins, so the first thing you see is Cypriot. Sorry, guys, I think you are one of this season's chump teams. Don't take it personnally when you get run over, it just is what it is. I apologize in advance for any jokes I make at your expense throughout the season as I do the write-ups, it's just really hard to find any humor in this league right now.
Maladorous Football Beavers - Same goes to you, BigRagu. Someday I hope you'll enlighten those of us who were still slogging it out in EEA4 last season as to what exactly possessed you to totally rebuild the Hitmen. In the meantime, I look forward to the guaranteed win, but I take no satisfaction in it.
So, there's the Season 8 Preview Special. I look forward to week 2, when conference play starts in earnest and we can all commence with the smack talk. Until then, good luck Zeta, let's get us an Alpha sweep. Well, except for you guys, Freedom and Beavers. Just do your best, okay?
Week 1 begins the season with the GLB traditional out of conference matchups. So far in the preseason, Alpha has looked very capable against the Zeta teams, but Zeta will be looking to prove that scrimmages mean nothing and only the regular season and postseason matter. Without further ado, let's take a look at the teams that make up Zeta and get an idea of who's who and what's what in this very tough conference.
Sebastian Jani-Dates: The highest rated team in the conference, the Jani-Dates look to improve on last season's debacle. Coming off of an 0-16 season, there's nowhere to go but up, and team owner Kutzy has thrown it all in with the Even boys to make a run for the championship. This is Daniel Snyder's Dream Team, a single agent with all of the right players whose signing suddenly makes the Dates look like the team to beat. The chemistry hit came early and is already disappearing fast, so anyone looking to take advantage will have to do so early. The overall quality of the players will make chemistry a non factor, for the most part.
Jefferson City Bucks - Another team to watch out for, the Bucks are hungry after losing the conference championship to the Macedonian Lions. The roster showcases a lot of high level talent, and they've shown that they know how to win games. The offense is fully capable of focusing either way, forcing opposing defenses to play a guessing game when planning out their tactics. The Bucks will almost certainly make another deep playoff run this season.
Macedonian Lions - Last season's EEA3 League Champion, the Lions find themselves in the enviable position of being promoted into this league ready to compete again. They also have the privilige of facing the Sebastian Jani-Dates early in the season, at a time when team chemistry might still be a bit of a factor. They do come into the league with a bit of a bullseye on their foreheads, as many of their former opponents have come here as well, and will gameplan especially fervently against the Lions. Macedonian's chances at a second trophy will be determined by how well they handle the teams that want revenge.
Kazakhstan Dragons - The Dragons are no stranger to the league, having been promoted in the previous season after winning the EEA4 Zeta Conference championship. Despite being at a disadvantage, Kazakhstan played well enough to get themselves into the playoffs, but couldn't advance to the next round. This season, they will try to change that outcome, and so far look to be in good shape to contend with the best of the league. A few good pickups in free agency should help the cause, but they will have some work to do to overcome the personnel issues that come along with recruiting, such as the big chemistry hit, and the CPU punter. That said, if there was any position I would rather have a high level CPU player in if I had to, it would be the punter.
Bratislava Butchers - Last season, the Butchers were primed to win it all, until their fiercest rival, the Secretville Offtopics, pulled out an amazing overtime win to end Bratislava's undefeated season in the EEA4 Zeta Conference championships. One look at the starting roster and you can see that this is not last year's Butchers, but a new and improved version hungry to prove a point. Key offseason pickups and a team first attitude from the agents allowed Bratislava to keep the core of the team intact while vastly improving the starting lineup without taking a huge chemistry hit. As a Butcher, all I can say is, we don't have any expectations of dominating this league the way we did last season, but we aren't planning on laying down, either. We're here to compete.
Hill Valley Deloreans - Hill Valley moved into this league last season feeling pretty good about their performance in EEA4, having only lost three games to two teams. They didn't have the juice to compete as well as they would have liked last season, barely missing the playoffs. This season they have the benefit of experience in this league, and will make things tough on the newly promoted teams. The EEA4 promotees remember Hill Valley's success there, however. Without Cosa Nostra around to focus some of their vengeful attitudes upon, the Deloreans may find themselves targeted by default.
Czechoslovakia Mates - The disappointment of last season will be forgotten as the new season brings new possibilities. Chess requires a great deal of patience and planning, and the Czech Mates know that football is nothing more than human chess. A few offseason moves here, an AI tweak or two there, and suddenly you've turned a 6-10 team into a playoff contender. Whether the Mates have been successful with this strategy is still very much up in the air, but close losses to superior teams in the preseason does bode well for their future. They say there's no such thing as a good loss, but I don't subscribe to that theory.
Secretville Offtopics - After beating the unbeatable Butchers to secure their place in the EEA4 League Championship, the Offtopics were defeated in a close game by Alpha's Vinius Velociraptors. Everyone's favorite British wig-dog and company now look to continue their excellence here in the killing fields of EEAA2. The Offtopics are one of those teams that have as good a chance as anyone of making a deep run into the playoffs, but the competition is much more intense here. With very little roster movement to speak of, Secretville looks much the same as they did last year, which is still a very tough team to beat.
Maribor Triforce - The only team to beat the Macedonian Lions last season, the Triforce couldn't spark that magic twice when they lost a brutal defense-heavy playoff game in the second round. The rematch is set for week two of this season, and a Triforce win could set an interesting tone for the whole conference. This is a very good team that will find itself competing with a lot of other very good teams, all vying for a decent playoff seed behind the conference big dogs.
Mombasa Wombats - During the last regular season, the Wombats beat the Bucks and the Triforce and played a tough game against the Lions, but the Bucks triumphed in the playoff rematch against Mombasa. The Wombats' promotion to the next level sets up some very interesting matchups against these teams. Like the Triforce, they will contend for a bottom berth toward the end of the season. From what I can tell by their chemistry, they have made few moves and will keep the core of their team intact as they make their run at the postseason.
Warsaw Wolfpack - Last season's losses for the Wolfpack all came at the hands of the EEA4 opponents they must face again, a situation that has to be a little worrying for an otherwise fine team. Warsaw started last season with big chemistry hits from recruiting, and this season will begin that way again. Against the multitude of lesser opponents EEA4 provided, their poor chemistry wasn't much of a factor, but with so many close games ahead against equal or better teams, the Wolfpack may find themselves having a hard time winning.
WhatsaMatta U Fighting Elk - After a 0-5 start last season, the Elk managed to squeak their way into the playoffs on the basis of a few tiebreakers. Their luck ran out in the first round, but the new season has them ready to take on the next wave of promotees. The Elk performed okay in the preseason, with a strong game against Arkadak, but could have beaten the Black Belts had their defense been a little tighter. However, as I have stated before, the preseason means little, so only time will tell what the Elk really have in their tank.
South City Chiefs - After a 14-2 season, the Chiefs got rolled under the Offtopic bus on the way to the championship. The Chiefs may have been the team to inspire the Italy Guardians to hire BigRagu's Hitmen away from EEAA2, handing them a frist round defeat before the Secretville loss. This season, the Chiefs may be an overlooked contender, having already lost two tough scrimmages against Alpha. They have the ability to win games, but still have something to prove in the eyes of most of the league.
Prague Beersteins - The Beersteins had a nice season going in EEA3, but ran into the Texas Red Dragons on the way. Their solid performance led to their promotion, but the Beersteins won't see many of their old opponents. Prague was an Alpha team last season, so the rest of the promotees from their conference are in our Alpha now. The Beersteins essentially wipe the slate clean with the move, since hardly anyone has played against their AI, nor have they seen much of their opponents' AI. Prague is a mystery, wrapped in an enigma...
Cypriot Freedom - The slow buildin' slowbuilders are in a tough spot this season. Usually, when you look at your schedule at the beginning of the season, you tend to look first for the guaranteed wins. This gives you something to build on as you look at your "maybe we can win" games. Unfortunately, this conference has a severe shortage of guaranteed wins, so the first thing you see is Cypriot. Sorry, guys, I think you are one of this season's chump teams. Don't take it personnally when you get run over, it just is what it is. I apologize in advance for any jokes I make at your expense throughout the season as I do the write-ups, it's just really hard to find any humor in this league right now.
Maladorous Football Beavers - Same goes to you, BigRagu. Someday I hope you'll enlighten those of us who were still slogging it out in EEA4 last season as to what exactly possessed you to totally rebuild the Hitmen. In the meantime, I look forward to the guaranteed win, but I take no satisfaction in it.
So, there's the Season 8 Preview Special. I look forward to week 2, when conference play starts in earnest and we can all commence with the smack talk. Until then, good luck Zeta, let's get us an Alpha sweep. Well, except for you guys, Freedom and Beavers. Just do your best, okay?
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