I have called you all here today, because there are a few things I wanted to get off my chest. Comments have been made about me, and the team I play on. I would like all of my fans to know that they will not be disappointed this season. I will continue shutting up Wr’s on our path to glory. And you, my faithful fans, will join me in a glorious celebration when I’m enshrined in canton….moving on, lets start the Q&A
Q: how do you feel about the loss to the eter..
MC: Wait! Shutup. Before you start asking stupid questions, I would like to address the logo on my shirt. That’s right, “I Support Nephyte”. You know why? Because I just do. Nephyte and I have a lot in common. So, im starting a new legion called the Nephyters.
We are the Nephyters. Ok, continue.
Q: How do you feel about your postseason loss the The Eternity.
MC: They cheated. Plain and simple. Didn’t you watch the game? They were’ holding jerseys the whole damn time. Not to mention the backs lubbed themselves up with His & Hers KY. I went to go make a tackle and that little N**ga slipped right threw me. Bullshit, that game was fixed. GLB wanted the eternity in the championship just for ratings….
Q: How do you feel about the return of the Current?
MC: lol. Tell those boys this: F T C has a new meaning here in Canada A#4. FEAR.THE.CARTER. Booya bitches, next question.
Q: Uhm, yes Mr. Carter, is there any WR that you look forward to facing this year.
MC: First off, you need to refer to me as THE Mr. Carter. Respect; don’t get shit twisted girl. As far as Wr’s go, I look forward to facing Dan Dan. Ima knock that fool’s teeth out next time he tries one of those fade routes. And Ozmosis, gotta keep his ass in check too. Watch ur legs Ozmosis, ima getchyo ass if you ain’t carefull. It’s gonna be hard to run routes with my cleats stuck in your ass.
Q: What about the leviathans, where do you see you’re team at the end of season?
MC: You mean before or after we hoist the trophy? Cuz I know what ima be doing after we put that thing in our closet. Ahh, you know what im saying Blanket? You know what Im sayin…..bitches get ready cuz the Anaconda is comin’ to town. Splam! Splam, ima give it ya good girl. You too news reporter. I see you’re little sweet white ass getting excited over there. THE penis is made of chocolate and ejaculates money baby, you know you want it. I’ll see you after the show gurl.
Q: THE Mr. Carter, do you have any career goals this season.
MC: I don’t know, but I do know I’d love to tap that white ass over there. Come on girl, come sit next to THE Mecca Carter.
(reporter goes up stage and sits next to THE Mecca Carter)
Q: THE MR….
MC: Shutup. What’s your name gurl?
Reporter: Suzy (giggles)
MC: Well suzy, ever seen the Anaconda?
MF3K: Mecca, please keep it appropriate.
MC: No worries.
Q: THE Mr. Carter, can u tell us about how you prepare yourself, or how you manage to be so good at what you do?
MC: 3 Parts greatness, 2 parts awesome baby. And a whole lotta white bitches! They’re like medicine, huh Suzy? Nah, seriously though, you can’t prepare this kinda greatness. It just comes straight out the box, ya know? I mean, the doctor slapped me on the ass when I was born and said, “Damn, that’s a nice ass”. It just happens that way. This is pure perfection right here. Can’t teach it, nope.
Q: Any words of encouragement for your fellow DB’s?
MC: Yeah, keep yo heads up. Don’t let the man get you down. Riot and get paid N****s! Bring home the chedda’ and spend it on strippas! And Goldsmith, ur wife is a perfect dime, son! Better keep that shit away from a playa playa before she falls for a real balla! I saw her givin’ me the ole “I wanna suck you” eyes last season after our game. Keep that shit on check. Don’t hate the playa, hate the game.
MC: To close this out, I just want Canada A#4 to be scared, be on the look out cuz THE Mecca Carter is on the creep. Our secondary is full of real ballhawks. Throw to the outside; get picked, throw inside and get lit-the-fuck-up. QB’s beware, we’re gunnin for your asses. Our LB’s are gonna bomb on you. Best wear a flak jacket cuz we breaking ribs this season baby. Peace!
MC: Lets go Suzy; ima teach ur cute little white ass ‘bout some real “Black-Snake Moan”
Q: how do you feel about the loss to the eter..
MC: Wait! Shutup. Before you start asking stupid questions, I would like to address the logo on my shirt. That’s right, “I Support Nephyte”. You know why? Because I just do. Nephyte and I have a lot in common. So, im starting a new legion called the Nephyters.
We are the Nephyters. Ok, continue.
Q: How do you feel about your postseason loss the The Eternity.
MC: They cheated. Plain and simple. Didn’t you watch the game? They were’ holding jerseys the whole damn time. Not to mention the backs lubbed themselves up with His & Hers KY. I went to go make a tackle and that little N**ga slipped right threw me. Bullshit, that game was fixed. GLB wanted the eternity in the championship just for ratings….
Q: How do you feel about the return of the Current?
MC: lol. Tell those boys this: F T C has a new meaning here in Canada A#4. FEAR.THE.CARTER. Booya bitches, next question.
Q: Uhm, yes Mr. Carter, is there any WR that you look forward to facing this year.
MC: First off, you need to refer to me as THE Mr. Carter. Respect; don’t get shit twisted girl. As far as Wr’s go, I look forward to facing Dan Dan. Ima knock that fool’s teeth out next time he tries one of those fade routes. And Ozmosis, gotta keep his ass in check too. Watch ur legs Ozmosis, ima getchyo ass if you ain’t carefull. It’s gonna be hard to run routes with my cleats stuck in your ass.
Q: What about the leviathans, where do you see you’re team at the end of season?
MC: You mean before or after we hoist the trophy? Cuz I know what ima be doing after we put that thing in our closet. Ahh, you know what im saying Blanket? You know what Im sayin…..bitches get ready cuz the Anaconda is comin’ to town. Splam! Splam, ima give it ya good girl. You too news reporter. I see you’re little sweet white ass getting excited over there. THE penis is made of chocolate and ejaculates money baby, you know you want it. I’ll see you after the show gurl.
Q: THE Mr. Carter, do you have any career goals this season.
MC: I don’t know, but I do know I’d love to tap that white ass over there. Come on girl, come sit next to THE Mecca Carter.
(reporter goes up stage and sits next to THE Mecca Carter)
Q: THE MR….
MC: Shutup. What’s your name gurl?
Reporter: Suzy (giggles)
MC: Well suzy, ever seen the Anaconda?
MF3K: Mecca, please keep it appropriate.
MC: No worries.
Q: THE Mr. Carter, can u tell us about how you prepare yourself, or how you manage to be so good at what you do?
MC: 3 Parts greatness, 2 parts awesome baby. And a whole lotta white bitches! They’re like medicine, huh Suzy? Nah, seriously though, you can’t prepare this kinda greatness. It just comes straight out the box, ya know? I mean, the doctor slapped me on the ass when I was born and said, “Damn, that’s a nice ass”. It just happens that way. This is pure perfection right here. Can’t teach it, nope.
Q: Any words of encouragement for your fellow DB’s?
MC: Yeah, keep yo heads up. Don’t let the man get you down. Riot and get paid N****s! Bring home the chedda’ and spend it on strippas! And Goldsmith, ur wife is a perfect dime, son! Better keep that shit away from a playa playa before she falls for a real balla! I saw her givin’ me the ole “I wanna suck you” eyes last season after our game. Keep that shit on check. Don’t hate the playa, hate the game.
MC: To close this out, I just want Canada A#4 to be scared, be on the look out cuz THE Mecca Carter is on the creep. Our secondary is full of real ballhawks. Throw to the outside; get picked, throw inside and get lit-the-fuck-up. QB’s beware, we’re gunnin for your asses. Our LB’s are gonna bomb on you. Best wear a flak jacket cuz we breaking ribs this season baby. Peace!
MC: Lets go Suzy; ima teach ur cute little white ass ‘bout some real “Black-Snake Moan”
