WELCOME TO THE SEASON 15 CHAMPIONSHIP EXTRAVAGANZA!!!
Note--If you want to find out the results of the game, I will post a running commentary that is SPOILER FREE (until, obviously, the end of the post). Because I plan on doing this, PLEASE DO NOT CONGRATULATE ANY TEAMS in your TOPIC SENTENCE if you choose to post about this game in another thread. In fact, let's just keep all of the congratulating in this thread, to avoid any spoilers.
Now, as all of you know, I’ve done quite a few write-ups. And frankly, I’m tired. I’m tired of doing write-ups where I have to pretend that Diablo is going to be challenged, where I have to pretend that Diablo might give up more than 2 TDs.
I’m also tired of Bill Simmons’ shtick, but that’s for another day, in another life.
Well kids, I just took a long nap, and guess what: I don’t have to pretend that Texoma might put up a fight--I know they’re going to put up a fight. This season has been a fairly interesting one. We’ve seen the continued excellence of the Diablo Dots, and the rise of a team who I predicted last year would be in the Finals this season. Not to toot my own horn too much or anything, but let’s just call me “Josephadamus” for the rest of our time together, shall we?
Coming out of the Western Conference, the Texoma Bay Pirates are looking like they’ll be the team to beat for decades, er, seasons to come. Incorporated in Season 8, they have an identical record as the Athens Minotaurs, standing a stout 112-16 over their first 8 seasons. However, they’ve never quite put it all together in the Championship game. Call it bad luck, or call it fate, they’ve continuously ended up in leagues with some of the best teams in Casual history.
Since Season 8, they played in the Leagues Finals in Season 8 (won, lost in the championship), Season 9 (lost to Casual legends Liberty or Death), Season 11 (lost to the KC Flush), Season 12 (lost to Diablo), and Season 15 (beat the Athens Minotaurs). Their Season 8 finale is perhaps one of the greatest in Casual history, as they lost a heartbreaker to the Casual Jail team, 33-30—a 29 yard field goal with 9 seconds left on the clock crushed the hopes of a young Texoma team and left them grasping for answers.
No doubt this play has been running through Peach and Razor’s minds as they plan for the mighty Diablo Dots:
Originally posted by the most devastating thing to ever happen, in real life or GLB
0:09 1st & 10 OPP 12 29 yd field goal attempted by Carlos VanDerHosen, made [FG]
In Season 15, Texoma steamrolled the competition. Like their two owners, they have peach-sweet athleticism to go with their razor-sharp instinct to win. In their first 6 games, they allowed a mere 3 touchdowns, and they finished the season a sterling 16-0, taking down some impressive challengers, including the Gridiron Phantoms, Macon Bacon, the Athens Minotaurs, and the Wellington Spitfires, en route to their second perfect regular season.
In the playoffs, after destroying the Bridgetown RumRunners in a battle of the buccaneers, they beat up on the Macon Bacon 62-13, before taking on the Athens Minotaurs in the Western Conference finals. Only two teams have appeared in every conference finals game in Casual Pro history: Diablo Dots and Athens Minotaurs. For Texoma, this game was about redemption, and vanquishing the ghosts of Season 14. Last year, Athens withstood a late charge, letting Texoma march all the way to the Athens 31 before closing out the game, 16-10.
I like drama, and I like that Texoma had to go through last season’s dream-ender to reach their goal. In the conference finale, Texoma used the strength of their passing attack and Athens’s butter fingers to deliver Western Conference gold to the Pirates, winning 49-27. For the second straight year, the Minotaurs went home with nothing to show for their stellar season.
Owner Joseph Blitz (that's me, you illiterate fool) had nothing but good things to say, however, about the Bucs—“I’ve been expecting the rise of Texoma for at least a season now, and while I wish things had gone differently, I can truthfully say that Texoma is the best representative for the Western conference, and if anyone can take down Diablo, it’s the Pirates.” As Razor said privately after the game, “You guys were the best team we had to battle this season.”
Well I’ve got news for you, Razor. Things are about to get a whole lot more difficult.
As I’ve said many times before, there’s nothing new under the sun to write about Diablo. A ferocious passing attack, an extremely sick special teams unit, and an owner that refuses to lose. Now, I know The Avenger a little bit, and I have to say, there’s a reason that the only other coaches associated with Diablo are scouts or recruiters. The man is a fanatic. He does everything himself. And I mean everything. He even prepares his Dots’ Lunchables for them. So take my word when I say that Diablo is going to be as prepared for this game as they were for the first game of their impressive streak.
As he told me tonight in the pregame press conference, “"We are looking very forward to a very good and experienced but relatively unknown Pirates squad. It will be our toughest game since this streak started back on September 19th, 2009. Everyone pull up their Pirate boots, because these DIABLO DOTS will bring the hell, what more can you ask for!
”
Apparently the Diablo Dots are so good, they were given their own smiley face.
The Dots are on the verge of being only the second casual league team to reach 80 straight wins (Brewed to Perfection reeled off 81 straight before losing their in their second regular season game this season; http://goallineblitz.com/game/team.pl?team_id=5002), and only the fourth team ever to win 80 or more straight games. Judging by the way this team looks, if they win tonight, it could be 100 straight for them.
To quickly recap their legacy:
S12—beat Gridiron Armageddon, 30-16
S13—beat Gridiron Phantoms, 67-0
S14—beat Gridiron Armageddon, 57-10
S15—???????
Hmm, maybe a change in their opponent’s home location will change Diablo’s fate?
Their game against the Wild Thangs in the Eastern Conference championship pitted the Season 15 Casual Addicts Tournament champions with the 3rd place team from that very tournament. The Wild Thangs turned in another excellent season, no doubt due to the coaching/owning of the wild haired Stizz, who told me himself that he was as happy as possible by their performance. “You always want to win,” Stizz said, gently pulling a pick through his afro, “but coming within a few plays of taking down Avenger’s squad bodes well for our future.”
These two teams have met before. In Season 13, the Dots stomped on Texoma 61-9 in the regular season, blowing a game that was 17-9 at halftime out of reach by putting up 44 points in the second half. In Season 12, Texoma fell to Diablo 48-13 in the regular season and were outgunned 79-3 in the Western Conference finals—the very season that Diablo began their record run.
As well, let me remind you that these two teams were involved in a verbal skirmish earlier in the year, as Razor claimed to be the first team in Casual Pro to reach the 1000 lolpoint barrier. Now, I don't know about you, but I think the Minotaurs are pretty good testament to just how lol-able lolpoints are. Clearly, being witty and handsome is just as useful for getting to the Conference finals, season after season.
I expect the Dots to continue to do what they’ve done all year. Using their passing game to secure big gains and relying on their two HBs to pick up first downs and short yardage to keep the chains moving. Their swarming defense will be difficult to pass against, as they surely have the fastest secondary in the league, but from what I’ve seen, Texoma’s wide receivers have the footspeed to match them.
This game may be won by the team that plays most effectively in the air. Texoma’s got a couple of advantages, one of which being that between Peach and Razor, almost all of their players are controlled by 2 people. Now, as anyone who owns an army of Iron Men drones knows, being able to control all of them makes for some pretty neat fireworks, and allows you to have pretty exacting control on your tactics. Texoma is all about making the crucial plays when they need to, so expect this game to be relatively free of errors for both teams.
This is going to be the closest Casual Pro Final ever, and I personally look forward to it. I know both owners and without a doubt, they are standup people. Good luck to both teams. Is this the end of the Diablo reign and the beginning of our pirate overlords, or will Diablo be victorious yet again?
I’m out faster than LeBron's leaving Cleveland.
.ılı. ---------------Upset-O-Meter--------------.ılı.
▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ ▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ █
Not Possible- - - - - - - - - - - - ● - - -Possible
Note--If you want to find out the results of the game, I will post a running commentary that is SPOILER FREE (until, obviously, the end of the post). Because I plan on doing this, PLEASE DO NOT CONGRATULATE ANY TEAMS in your TOPIC SENTENCE if you choose to post about this game in another thread. In fact, let's just keep all of the congratulating in this thread, to avoid any spoilers.
Now, as all of you know, I’ve done quite a few write-ups. And frankly, I’m tired. I’m tired of doing write-ups where I have to pretend that Diablo is going to be challenged, where I have to pretend that Diablo might give up more than 2 TDs.
I’m also tired of Bill Simmons’ shtick, but that’s for another day, in another life.
Well kids, I just took a long nap, and guess what: I don’t have to pretend that Texoma might put up a fight--I know they’re going to put up a fight. This season has been a fairly interesting one. We’ve seen the continued excellence of the Diablo Dots, and the rise of a team who I predicted last year would be in the Finals this season. Not to toot my own horn too much or anything, but let’s just call me “Josephadamus” for the rest of our time together, shall we?
Coming out of the Western Conference, the Texoma Bay Pirates are looking like they’ll be the team to beat for decades, er, seasons to come. Incorporated in Season 8, they have an identical record as the Athens Minotaurs, standing a stout 112-16 over their first 8 seasons. However, they’ve never quite put it all together in the Championship game. Call it bad luck, or call it fate, they’ve continuously ended up in leagues with some of the best teams in Casual history.
Since Season 8, they played in the Leagues Finals in Season 8 (won, lost in the championship), Season 9 (lost to Casual legends Liberty or Death), Season 11 (lost to the KC Flush), Season 12 (lost to Diablo), and Season 15 (beat the Athens Minotaurs). Their Season 8 finale is perhaps one of the greatest in Casual history, as they lost a heartbreaker to the Casual Jail team, 33-30—a 29 yard field goal with 9 seconds left on the clock crushed the hopes of a young Texoma team and left them grasping for answers.
No doubt this play has been running through Peach and Razor’s minds as they plan for the mighty Diablo Dots:
Originally posted by the most devastating thing to ever happen, in real life or GLB
0:09 1st & 10 OPP 12 29 yd field goal attempted by Carlos VanDerHosen, made [FG]
In Season 15, Texoma steamrolled the competition. Like their two owners, they have peach-sweet athleticism to go with their razor-sharp instinct to win. In their first 6 games, they allowed a mere 3 touchdowns, and they finished the season a sterling 16-0, taking down some impressive challengers, including the Gridiron Phantoms, Macon Bacon, the Athens Minotaurs, and the Wellington Spitfires, en route to their second perfect regular season.
In the playoffs, after destroying the Bridgetown RumRunners in a battle of the buccaneers, they beat up on the Macon Bacon 62-13, before taking on the Athens Minotaurs in the Western Conference finals. Only two teams have appeared in every conference finals game in Casual Pro history: Diablo Dots and Athens Minotaurs. For Texoma, this game was about redemption, and vanquishing the ghosts of Season 14. Last year, Athens withstood a late charge, letting Texoma march all the way to the Athens 31 before closing out the game, 16-10.
I like drama, and I like that Texoma had to go through last season’s dream-ender to reach their goal. In the conference finale, Texoma used the strength of their passing attack and Athens’s butter fingers to deliver Western Conference gold to the Pirates, winning 49-27. For the second straight year, the Minotaurs went home with nothing to show for their stellar season.
Owner Joseph Blitz (that's me, you illiterate fool) had nothing but good things to say, however, about the Bucs—“I’ve been expecting the rise of Texoma for at least a season now, and while I wish things had gone differently, I can truthfully say that Texoma is the best representative for the Western conference, and if anyone can take down Diablo, it’s the Pirates.” As Razor said privately after the game, “You guys were the best team we had to battle this season.”
Well I’ve got news for you, Razor. Things are about to get a whole lot more difficult.
As I’ve said many times before, there’s nothing new under the sun to write about Diablo. A ferocious passing attack, an extremely sick special teams unit, and an owner that refuses to lose. Now, I know The Avenger a little bit, and I have to say, there’s a reason that the only other coaches associated with Diablo are scouts or recruiters. The man is a fanatic. He does everything himself. And I mean everything. He even prepares his Dots’ Lunchables for them. So take my word when I say that Diablo is going to be as prepared for this game as they were for the first game of their impressive streak.
As he told me tonight in the pregame press conference, “"We are looking very forward to a very good and experienced but relatively unknown Pirates squad. It will be our toughest game since this streak started back on September 19th, 2009. Everyone pull up their Pirate boots, because these DIABLO DOTS will bring the hell, what more can you ask for!
” Apparently the Diablo Dots are so good, they were given their own smiley face.
The Dots are on the verge of being only the second casual league team to reach 80 straight wins (Brewed to Perfection reeled off 81 straight before losing their in their second regular season game this season; http://goallineblitz.com/game/team.pl?team_id=5002), and only the fourth team ever to win 80 or more straight games. Judging by the way this team looks, if they win tonight, it could be 100 straight for them.
To quickly recap their legacy:
S12—beat Gridiron Armageddon, 30-16
S13—beat Gridiron Phantoms, 67-0
S14—beat Gridiron Armageddon, 57-10
S15—???????
Hmm, maybe a change in their opponent’s home location will change Diablo’s fate?
Their game against the Wild Thangs in the Eastern Conference championship pitted the Season 15 Casual Addicts Tournament champions with the 3rd place team from that very tournament. The Wild Thangs turned in another excellent season, no doubt due to the coaching/owning of the wild haired Stizz, who told me himself that he was as happy as possible by their performance. “You always want to win,” Stizz said, gently pulling a pick through his afro, “but coming within a few plays of taking down Avenger’s squad bodes well for our future.”
These two teams have met before. In Season 13, the Dots stomped on Texoma 61-9 in the regular season, blowing a game that was 17-9 at halftime out of reach by putting up 44 points in the second half. In Season 12, Texoma fell to Diablo 48-13 in the regular season and were outgunned 79-3 in the Western Conference finals—the very season that Diablo began their record run.
As well, let me remind you that these two teams were involved in a verbal skirmish earlier in the year, as Razor claimed to be the first team in Casual Pro to reach the 1000 lolpoint barrier. Now, I don't know about you, but I think the Minotaurs are pretty good testament to just how lol-able lolpoints are. Clearly, being witty and handsome is just as useful for getting to the Conference finals, season after season.
I expect the Dots to continue to do what they’ve done all year. Using their passing game to secure big gains and relying on their two HBs to pick up first downs and short yardage to keep the chains moving. Their swarming defense will be difficult to pass against, as they surely have the fastest secondary in the league, but from what I’ve seen, Texoma’s wide receivers have the footspeed to match them.
This game may be won by the team that plays most effectively in the air. Texoma’s got a couple of advantages, one of which being that between Peach and Razor, almost all of their players are controlled by 2 people. Now, as anyone who owns an army of Iron Men drones knows, being able to control all of them makes for some pretty neat fireworks, and allows you to have pretty exacting control on your tactics. Texoma is all about making the crucial plays when they need to, so expect this game to be relatively free of errors for both teams.
This is going to be the closest Casual Pro Final ever, and I personally look forward to it. I know both owners and without a doubt, they are standup people. Good luck to both teams. Is this the end of the Diablo reign and the beginning of our pirate overlords, or will Diablo be victorious yet again?
I’m out faster than LeBron's leaving Cleveland.
.ılı. ---------------Upset-O-Meter--------------.ılı.
▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ ▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ █
Not Possible- - - - - - - - - - - - ● - - -Possible
Edited by josephblitz on May 14, 2010 23:03:54
Edited by josephblitz on May 14, 2010 23:01:54
